Transcribed By: Victim of Circumstance
Date Added: 2003-05-23

Men in Black
Moe, Larry, Curly
1934

Players:    Dr. Graves - Dell Henderson

            Hiccuping Nurse - Jeanie Roberts (Shown as
            "Nurse")
            Doctor - Bud Jamison
            Messenger Boy - Bobby Callahan (Shown as           
            "M.Boy")
            Coma Pateint - Little Billy(Shown as 
            "C.Patient")
            D.T. Patient - Billy Gilbert
            Whispering Nurse -  Ruth Hiatt (Shown as 
            "W.Nurse")
            Anna Conda - Phyllis Crane(Shown as "A.Conda")


            Scene 1 (Dr. Graves Office)

Dr. Graves: My dear doctors, it is indeed a pleasure to
            welcome you here for the beginning of your 
            practice.  This letter states that in this 
            group there are three of you who are not overly
            bright, but were graduated because you had been  
            in the senior class too many years. Your 
            identity I shall keep secret, and will disclose 
            to know one, on on condition, that you try hard
            and forever devote your life to the glorious 
            cause of duty and humanity.
            (Larry, Moe, and Curly appear from behind a
            group of doctors.)
All Three:  We will!
Larry:      Hello Doc, how are ya? Glad to see ya again.
            (Moe pulls Larry''s hair.)
Moe:        Spread out.
Dr.Graves:  Do you heir by solemnly swear to devote the rest
            of your life to the cause of duty and humanity?
All Three:  For duty and humanity!!
            (Moe, Larry, and Curly gather in a huddle.)
Dr.Graves:  And remember. When you hear your call over the
            Loud Speaker, rush immediately to answer, as 
            seconds mean life!
All Three:  Yes sir.
L.Speaker:  Calling Dr. Howard, Dr. Fine, Dr. Howard.
            Calling Dr. Howard, Dr. Fine, Dr. Howard.
Curly:      Woo-woo-woo-woo-woo-woo-woo!
            (Moe, Larry, and Curly rush out of the office,
            slamming the door behind them breaking the  
            glass.)


            Scene 2 (Hospital Corridor)

            (Moe, Larry, and Curly go into the store room,
            and drive a three-seated bike out and down the 
            hallway.)
L.Speaker:  Dr. Howard report to room 66, Dr. Fine room 72,
            Dr. Howard room 83. Room 66, 72, 83.
L.Speaker:  66, 72, 83.
Moe:        On track 13, all aboard for Philadelphia,
            Chicago, and points west.
L.Speaker:  Emergency call, emergency call, 66, 72, 83.
Curly:      Calling all cars.
Larry:      Calling all cars.
Moe:        Calling all cars.
Moe:        Calling all cars.
Larry:      Calling all cars.
Moe:        Put your hand down!
            (Larry directing traffic down the hallway.)
Larry:      Come on, get goin! Come on there! Calling all cars.
            (Larry walks over to the lady in the 
            wheelchair.)
Larry:      Oh a wise guy eh, I gotta good mind to hand you
            a ticket.  Where''s your drivers licence?
            (Moe slaps Larry in the head.)
Moe:        Spread out! Pull over to the curve you, I wanna
            talk to you. 
            Open your mouth. What''s your name?
Lady:       Anna Conda.
Moe:        Anna Conda what?
A.Conda:    No, no, just Anna Conda.
Moe:        Anna Conda.
Larry:      Anna Conda.
Moe:        Anna Conda 95 and a 8.
Larry:      Anna Conda 95 and a 8.
A.Conda:    That''s awfully low doctor.
Moe:        Yeah, we otta sell. Sell a hundred Anna Conda at
            95 and a 8.
Larry:      A hundred Anna Conda sold! Come on get goin.
Moe:        All right get goin.
Larry:      Break it up!
Moe:        Come on, come on, come on.
            (Curly rolls over on a stretcher covered in a
            bed sheet.)
Curly:      Woo-woo-woo-woo-woo-woo-woo-woo-woo-woo-woo-
            woo-woo, woo-woo-woop-woop-woop-woop.
Moe:        Ohhh, cutie pie?
Curly:      Yeah.
            (Moe slaps Curly.)
Moe:        Get off of that carriage.
Curly:      NO!
            (Larry slaps Curly, then pushes him around.)
Larry:      Get off of that carriage. Come o get outta here,
            get outta there!
Moe:        Take this carriage out.
Larry:      I''ll take it when I''m ready.
Moe:        Are ya ready?
Larry:      Yeah, I''m ready.


            Scene 3 (Hospital Corridor)


            (Scene opens with the repair man just finishing
            up on the broken  glass)
Nurse:      (Laughing) Oh, Dr. Howard, Dr. Fine, Dr. Howard.
            Is it true that an apple a day keeps the doctor 
            away? (Laughs)
Moe:        Yes, that''s true.
Nurse:      Well then, why don''t the patients eat an apple a
            day and save hospital expenses? (Laughs)
Curly:      Pardon me if I laugh, Nyuk, nyuk, nyuk, nyuk,
            nyuk, nyuk, nyuk, nyuk!  That''s a pippin.
Nurse:      Oh, I know what a pippin is.
Larry:      Ya do eh? What''s a pippin?
Nurse:      A pippin is an apple with a skin on the outside.
            (Laughs)
Moe:        Did you ever see an apple with a skin on the     
            inside?
Nurse:      Oh sure I did.
Larry:      You did?...Where?
Nurse:      In home made apple pie. (Laughs)
            (Moe, Larry and Curly faint.)
L.Speaker:  Dr. Howard, Dr. Fine, Dr. Howard.
Curly:      Woo-woo-woop-woop-woop.
L.Speaker:  Calling  Dr. Howard, Dr. Fine, Dr. Howard, Dr.
            Howard report to room 66, Dr. Fine 72, Dr.  
            Howard 83.  Dr. Howard, Dr. Fine, Dr. Howard, 
            report to Dr. Graves office.


            Scene 4 (Dr. Graves Office)

Larry:      Hello captain, you sent for us?
Dr.Graves:  Yes. How''d you find that patient in 66?
Moe:        Under the bed.
Dr.Graves:  How''d you find the patient in 72?

Larry:      Up on the chandelier.
Dr.Graves:  What''d you do for him?
Curly:      Nuthin, what''d he ever do for us?
Dr.Graves:  WHAT ARE YOU WORKING HERE FOR?
All Three:  For duty and humanity!
            (Moe, Larry, and Curly get in a huddle.)
L.Speaker:  Calling Dr. Howard, Dr. Fine, Dr. Howard.
Curly:      Woo-woo-woo-woop-woop.
            (Moe, Larry, and Curly rush out of the office
            again slamming the door and breaking the glass.)


            Scene 5 (Corridor)

            (The boys ride a horse down the corridor.)
Moe:        Giddy up Julius.
Larry:      Giddy up
Curly       Giddy up Julius.
L.Speaker:  Calling Dr. Howard, Dr. Fine, Dr. Howard.
Moe:        What is it?
L.Speaker:  There is a messenger boy down in the lobby to
            see you.
Larry:      Send him up!
M.Boy:      Here I am.
Curly:      What service... Give us the message.
M.Boy:      Can''t, seventy-five cents, collect.
Moe:        Who''s it from?
M.Boy:      It''s from a dame by the name of Nelly.
All Three:  My girl!
Curly:      What does she say?
M.Boy:      She says she loves all three, but she''ll marry
            the one that does the greatest thing for duty 
            and humanity.
All Three:  Thanks.
M.Boy:      Hey, how''s about my money?
Moe:        I''ll tell ya, we''ll toss for it, pay ya double
            or nuthin.
Larry:      Yeah, he''ll call it cause he''s tongue tied.
            (Pointing to Curly.)
M.Boy:      That''ll make it easy.
Larry:      Uh........have you got a coin?
M.Boy:      Sure.
Larry:      That''ll really make it easy! What is it, head or
            tail?
Curly:      Gnug!
M.Boy:      What?
Curly:      Gnug!
Larry:      Is that it?
Curly:      Soitenly!
            (Larry talking to the messenger boy.)
Larry       Oh, then you lose. We`ll split this three ways
            fellas.
Moe         You tellin me?
Curly:      Just a victim of circumstance.


            Scene 6 (Coma Patient''s Room)

            (All three looking at the patient)
Moe:        How is she doctor?
Doctor:     Slight hope.
Curly:      That''s to bad. What''s the matter?
Doctor:     She''s in a coma.
            (Patient sits up.)
Pateint:    I am not, I''m in a bed! (Looks at the boys.)
            Gee, the joint is haunted.
Larry:      How old are you?
Patient:    I''m thirty-five.
Curly:      Nah, you couldn''t get that fresh in thirty-five
            years.
Larry:      Lay down. (Pushing her back.)
Moe:        Gimme that......that thing there. She can''t live
            till morning.
Larry:      Ba-ba-ba-boo, ba-ba-ba-boo.
            (Moe slaps Larry.)
Doctor:     Just a minute, just a minute, what do you
            gentlemen know about 
            medicine?
Larry:      Why we graduated with the highest temperatures
            in our class.
Doctor:     Huh!. Some class.
Curly:      You said it kid, some class.
            (Moe hits Curly in the stomach, and then bonks
            him in the head.)
Moe:        What are you tryin to do?
Doctor:     Why, you don''t even know how to deliver a proper
            anaesthetic.
Moe:        Boys, give the doctor a little anesteisia. Ha ha
          
            ha.  (Larry and Curly hit the doctor with their     
            mallets.)
C.Patient:  A winner every time, no blanks! Say doctor, do
            ya really think 
            I''m gonna get better?
Moe:        I''m very sorry, but I''m afraid you are.
Patient:    Aw thanks doctor, you don''t know how I really
            appreciate it!
Larry:      DOCTOR! Where mighty proud of you, you''ve done a
            wonderful thing for humanity, and when we leave 
            here, we''re goin'' right down to the president''s  
            office and.........
Curly:      We won''t say a word about it!
            (Larry bonks Moe in the head with the mallet,
            and then Moe slaps Curly in the face and eye 
            pokes him.)
Moe:        What are ya buttin in for?
L.Speaker:  Calling Dr. Howard, Dr. Fine, Dr. Howard. Report
            to Dr. Graves office.  (Curly is looking at a  
            nurse, when Moe slaps him, then grabs Larry by 
            the hair.)
Moe:        Remember your oath for duty and humanity. Get   
            goin!


            Scene 7 (Dr. Graves Office)

Larry:      Right away sir, did you call us?
            (Dr.Graves talking on the phone.)
Dr.Graves:  Yes, and just another thing... uh.. uh.. hello.. 
            hello.. hello.. HELLO!!
Larry:      Hello!!
Dr.Graves:  Don''t let that body go out of 84 until the bill
            is paid.
Larry:      I ain`t got nobody!
Dr.Graves:  Yes, it''s in 84.
            (Curly on another phone.)
Curly:      Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes......lines busy.
            Hey there''s nobody on your line.
Moe:        I know, but I''m expecting a call.
Dr.Graves:  Just a minute, go to room 81, there''s a
            dangerous patient there, and hurry.......hurry!
Moe:        Don''t get nervous.
Curly:      The patient ain`t goin no place.
Dr.Graves:  HURRY!!
            (Moe, Larry, and Curly once again rush out of
            the office slamming the door and breaking the 
            glass.  Theboys go into the store room and drive
            
            out in go-carts.)


            Scene 8 (D.T. Patient''s Room)

Dt.Patient: That is the momentous question. I once asked
            Hamlet, and he made this suggestion; he said go 
            for a walk, and I met a dog!! Grrrrrrrrrrr-argh,
            grrrrrrr-argh,argh.Kweeeeeeeeeeeeeeeerrrrrr, 
            kwee, kwee, Pssss. Water........WATER!!! (Curly
            splashes water on him.)  Water.
Larry:      Fellas, lets get him some medicine.
Moe:        Oh yes. (They start mixing liquids.) Adapontash,
            citascram.
Curly:      Citascram.
Moe:        Forsia.
Larry:      Forsia
Moe:        Anna-conna-hon.
Curly:      Anna-conna-hon.
Moe:        Enot.
Larry:      Enot.
Curly:      Enot.
Larry:      That`s it (They pour themselves a glass.)  For 
            duty and humanity!
Dt.patient: RATS!! Ya know, once I was crazy. Ya see that
            button hole? Rats yousta come outta that, and as 
            fast as they`d come out, I`d grab
            um throw`em down, and another one would come  
            out.
Moe:        Hey hey, you ain`t, you ain`t well yet.
Dt.pateint: Why?
Moe:        Theres another one comin out now.
Dt.pateint: You take it, i`ve got enough of em.
Moe:        I`ll be see`in ya.
            (Moe walk to the window.)
Dt.pateint: LOOK!! Great big, giant, green canaries.
Moe:        Green canaries......huh.
            (A green canary lands on Moe`s shoulder, all
            three of the others see it.)
Curly:      Woop-woop-woo-woo-woo!
Dt.Patient: Ohhhhhhhh-ahhhhhhhhh.
            (Moe looks on his shoulder and can see the  
            canary.)
Moe:        Ahhhhh-ahhh-ahh-ah-ahhh-oh....move over you
            got company!


            Scene 9 (Corridor)

Nurse:      Dr. Howard, hiccup, Dr. Fine, hiccup, Dr.

            Howard, hiccup!!
Larry:      Her shoes are too tight.
Curly:      Her colds breakin up.
Nurse:      Hiccup!!
Larry:      Wait a minute, pitch that an octive higher.
Nurse:      HICCUP!
Larry:      Ohh-leee-oh-lay!
Nurse:      HICCUP!
Larry/Curly:Ohhh-laay!.
Nurse:      HICCUP!.
L/M/C:      Ohhhh-lay.
Nurse:      HICCUP!.
L/M/C:      Ohhh-ohhh-leee-oh-lay.
Nurse:      HICCUP!.
L/M/C:      Ohhh-lay.
Nurse:      HICCUP!.
L/M/C:      Ohh-a-lady-oh.
Nurse:      HICCUP, HICCUP!!
L.Speaker:  Dr. Howard, Dr. Fine, Dr. Howard.
L/M/C:      Hiccup, hiccup.
Nurse:      Hiccup, hiccup.


            Scene 10 (Dr. Graves Office)

Dr.Graves:  Terrible disaster at the oil wells, twenty men
            injured. Radium is the only thing that will save 
            their lives.
Curly:      Give us the radium and we`ll get goin.
Dr.Graves:  Its locked up in the safe, I cant get it!
Moe:        Why not?
Dr.Graves:  During the excitement I swallowed the
combonation to the safe, 
            put a burning cigar in my pocket.
Moe:        You got nuthin to worry about.
Dr.Graves:  But you don''t understand, the combination is in
            here. (Pointing to his stomach)
Moe:        You still got nuthin to worry about, we''ll get 
        
            it!
Dr.Graves:  How?
Moe:        We''ll operate!!
Dr.Graves:  Me?
Moe:        Yeah.
Dr.Graves:  You?
Moe:        YEAH!
Dr.Graves:  NO! ........ NO!
Moe:        Boys, give hi the anaesthetic, and see me in the
            operating room later, ha ha ha. GIVE!
            (Larry and Curly hit Dr. Graves with their  
            mallets.)
Dr.Graves:  Uhhhhhh.........


            Scene 11 (Operating Room)

W.Nurse:    Everything''s ready.
Moe:        We''ll make an incision like this.
Curly:      No, we''ll make an insertion like that.
Larry:      No, we''ll make an excursion like this.
All Three:  Tic-tac-toe!
L.Speaker:  Calling Dr. Howard, Dr. Fine, Dr. Howard.
Moe:        Shut up.
L.Speaker:  SHUT-UP YOURSELF!!!
W.Nurse:    Should I give him some more sodium amatol?
Larry:      Nah, give`m a Coca-Cola.
Dr.Graves:  No, Schnapps. (Curly hits him with his mallet.)
            Ohhh.....
W.Nurse:    Stop, we might cut him!!!!
Curly:      What do ya want me to do, kiss him?
Larry:      Wait a minute. Lets plug him, see if he''s ripe!
            Ha ha ha ha.
            (Moe slaps Larry.)
Moe:        Lady, why are we all whispering?
W.Nurse:    I don''t know why your whispering, but I lost my
            voice asking for a raise!
Moe:        Ahhhhhh-ahhhhhhh-ahhhhhh!!!!
Curly:      Woo-woo-woo-woop-woop!!!
            (Passing out the tools.)
Moe:        Tenen.
Larry:      Tenen.
Curly:      Tenen.
Moe:        Anago.
Larry:      Anago.
Curly:      Anago.
Moe:        Tenna-tuner.
Larry:      Tenna-tuner.
Curly:      Tenna-tuner.
Moe:        Anna-conna-puner.
Larry:      Anna-conna-puner.
Curly:      Anna-conna-puner.
Moe:        ANNA-CONNA-PANAR!!!
Curly:      Ohhh....
Larry:      Ohhh....
Moe:        Shift.
Larry:      One.
Curly:      Two.
Moe:        Three.
Larry:      Four.
Moe:        Finana.
Larry:      Finana.
Moe:        Anna-sinic.
Larry:      Anna- sinic.
Moe:        Cotton.
Larry:      Cotton.
Moe:        Cotton..............COTTON!!  Apid.
Larry:      Apid.
Moe:        Annic.
Larry:      Annic.
Moe:        Shift.
Larry:      Hike.
Moe:        Sceesars.
Larry:      Sceesars.
Moe:        Cotton.......................COTTON!!
            (Curly throws the cotton in Moe''s face.)
Larry:      Cotton...................COTTON!!!
            (Moe throws the cotton in Larry''s face.)
Moe:        There it is. Ha ha.
Larry:      He''s got it.
Curly:      He''s got it.
Larry:      Needles.
Moe:        Needles.
Curly:      Needles.
W.Nurse     Needles.
Moe:        Scissors.
Curly:      Scissors.
W.Nurse:    SCISSORS!!!
Moe:        Success.
Curly:      Success.
Moe:        Where are the tool?
Larry:      The tools!!
Curly:      Tools?
            (Dr. Graves gets up, shakes around a little
            realizing that the tools are in his stomach.)
L.Speaker:  Dr.Howard, Dr. Fine, Dr. Howard, are you coming?
Curly:      Woo-woo-woo-woo-woo-woo-woo-woo!!


            Scene 12(Corridor)

L.Speaker:  Calling Dr. Howard, Dr. Fine, Dr. Howard.
Larry:      Get it!!!
            (They all start beating the machine with their
            mallets.)
L.Speaker:  Calling Dr. Howard, Dr. Fine, Dr. Howard,Calling
            Dr. Howard, Dr. Fine, Dr. Howard. Calling Dr. 
            Howard, Dr. Fine, Dr. Howard.
Moe:        Ahhhhhhhhhh-hhh
Larry:      Ahhhhhhh
L.Speaker:  Dr. Howard, Dr. Fine, Dr. Howard. Dr. Howard,
            Dr. Fine, Dr. Howard.
Moe:        Where is that noise coming from?
Curly:      Where is it?
Larry:      Where can it be?
L.Speaker:  Dr. Howard, Dr. Fine, Dr. Howard.
Moe:        Look, there it is!!
            Dr. Howard, Dr. Fine, Dr. Howard.
            (Moe, Larry and Curly take out their pistols and
            shoot it.)
L.Speaker:  Ohhhhhh, they got me.
All Three:  For duty and humanity!!!!!


            The End

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"Ah fair one, come with me to the Cuspidor." - Shemp (THREE HAMS ON RYE, 1950)

Jump to Film or Short: 'FRAIDY CAT - 1951 (SJB) 3 DUMB CLUCKS - 1937 (MLC) 3 OF A KIND - 1944 (SSH) THE 3 STOOGES FOLLIES - 1974 (MLC) 4 FOR TEXAS - 1963 (MLD) 50 YEARS WITH THE STOOGES: THE FUNNIEST GUYS IN THE WORLD - 1983 (MISC) A DUCKING THEY DID GO - 1939 (MLC) A PLUMBING WE WILL GO - 1940 (MLC) ABBOTT AND COSTELLO MEET THE KEYSTONE KOPS - 1955 (SJB) ABSORBING JUNIOR - 1936 (SSH) AN ACHE IN EVERY STAKE - 1941 (MLC) AFRICA SCREAMS - 1949 (SSH_SJB) AIM, FIRE, SCOOT - 1952 (SJB) ALL GUMMED UP - 1947 (MLS) ALL THE WORLD'S A STOOGE - 1941 (MLC) ANOTHER THIN MAN - 1939 (SSH) ANTS IN THE PANTRY - 1936 (MLC) APPOINTMENT FOR LOVE - 1941 (SSH) ARABIAN NIGHTS - 1942 (SSH) ARMY DAZE - 1956 (SJB) ART TROUBLE - 1934 (SSH) BABY SITTERS JITTERS - 1951 (MLS) BACK FROM THE FRONT - 1943 (MLC) BACK TO THE WOODS - 1937 (MLC) THE BAND PLAYS ON - 1934 (STH) THE BANK DICK - 1940 (SSH) BEDLAM IN PARADISE - 1955 (MLS) BEER AND PRETZELS - 1933 (THS) BEER BARREL POLECATS - 1946 (MLC) BEHIND PRISON GATES - 1939 (SSH) THE BIG IDEA - 1934 (THS) A BIRD IN THE HEAD - 1946 (MLC) BLAZING STEWARDESSES - 1975 (MISC) THE BLONDE BOMBER - 1936 (SSH) BLONDIE KNOWS BEST - 1946 (SSH) BLUNDER BOYS - 1955 (MLS) BOMBSHELL - 1933 (STH) BOOBS IN ARMS - 1940 (MLC) BOOBS IN THE WOODS - 1940 (SSH) BOOBY DUPES - 1945 (MLC) BOOTY AND THE BEAST - 1953 (MLS) THE BRAVADOS - 1958 (SJD) BRIDE AND GLOOM - 1947 (SSH) BRIDELESS GROOM - 1947 (MLS) BROADWAY TO HOLLYWOOD - 1933 (SMH_SCH) BUBBLE TROUBLE - 1953 (MLS) BUCK PRIVATES - 1941 (SSH) BUSY BUDDIES - 1944 (MLC) BUTCH MINDS THE BABY - 1942 (SSH) CACTUS MAKES PERFECT - 1942 (MLC) CALLING ALL CURS - 1939 (MLC) THE CAPTAIN HATES THE SEA - 1934 (MLC) CASH AND CARRY - 1937 (MLC) THE CASINO MURDER CASE - 1935 (STH) CAUGHT ON THE BOUNCE - 1952 (SJB) THE CHOKE'S ON YOU - 1936 (SSH) CINDERFELLA - 1960 (SJB) CLOSE RELATIONS - 1933 (SSH) COMMOTION ON THE OCEAN - 1956 (MLS) CONVENTION GIRL - 1935 (SSH) COOKOO CAVALIERS - 1940 (MLC) CORN ON THE COP - 1934 (SSH) CORNY CASANOVAS - 1952 (MLS) CORONER CREEK - 1948 (SJD) CRACKED NUTS - 1941 (SSH) CRASH GOES THE HASH - 1944 (MLC) CRAZY HOUSE - 1943 (SSH) CRAZY KNIGHTS - 1944 (SSH) CREEPS - 1956 (MLS) CRIME ON THEIR HANDS - 1948 (MLS) CUCKOO ON A CHOO CHOO - 1952 (MLS) CUCKOORANCHO - 1938 (SJB) THE CURLY SHUFFLE - 1984 (MISC) DANCING LADY - 1933 (THS) DANGEROUS BUSINESS - 1946 (SSH) DAREDEVIL O'DARE - 1934 (SSH) A DAY IN THE COUNTRY - 1953 (SJB) DEATH ON THE DIAMOND - 1934 (STH) THE DESERT HAWK - 1950 (SJB) DISORDER IN THE COURT - 1936 (MLC) DISORDER IN THE COURT: 60th ANNIVERSARY TRIBUTE - 1990 (MISC) DIZZY & DAFFY - 1934 (SSH) DIZZY DETECTIVES - 1943 (MLC) DIZZY DOCTORS - 1937 (MLC) DIZZY PILOTS - 1943 (MLC) DIZZY YARDBIRD - 1950 (SJB) DOCTOR DEATH: SEEKER OF SOULS - 1973 (SMH) DON'T THROW THAT KNIFE - 1951 (MLS) DON'T WORRY, WE'LL THINK OF A TITLE - 1966 (SMH) DOPEY DICKS - 1950 (MLS) THE DOUGHGIRLS - 1944 (SJD) DUNKED IN THE DEEP - 1949 (MLS) DUTIFUL BUT DUMB - 1941 (MLC) EADIE WAS A LADY - 1945 (SJB) THE ERRAND BOY - 1961 (SJB) EVEN AS IOU - 1942 (MLC) EVERYBODY LIKES MUSIC - 1934 (SSH) FALSE ALARMS - 1936 (MLC) FEUDIN', FUSSIN', AND A-FIGHTIN' - 1948 (SJB) FIDDLERS THREE - 1948 (MLS) LA FIESTA DE SANTA BARBARA - 1935 (STH) FIFI BLOWS HER TOP - 1958 (MLJ) THE FIRE CHASER - 1954 (SJB) FISH HOOKEY - 1910 (SMH) FLAGPOLE JITTERS - 1956 (MLS) THE FLAME OF NEW ORLEANS - 1941 (SSH) FLAT FOOT STOOGES - 1938 (MLC) FLING IN THE RING - 1955 (MLS) FLYING SAUCER DAFFY - 1958 (MLJ) FOR CRIMIN' OUT LOUD - 1956 (MLS) FOR THE LOVE OF PETE - 1936 (SSH) FORSAKING ALL OTHERS - 1934 (STH) FOX FALL 1936 EXHIBITOR'S REEL - 1936 (STH) FOX FALL 1936 STUDIO TOUR - 1936 (STH) FOX MOVIETONE NEWS - 1929 (THS) FOX MOVIETONE NEWS - 1929 (STH) FOX MOVIETONE NEWS - 1961 (MLD) FOX MOVIETONE NEWS - RETURN TO PEYTON PLACE A Smash Hit - 1961 (MLD) THE FRENCH KEY - 1946 (SJD) FRIGHT NIGHT - 1947 (MLS) FROM NURSE TO WORSE - 1940 (MLC) FUELIN' AROUND - 1949 (MLS) FUGITIVE LOVERS - 1934 (THS) G. I. DOOD IT - 1955 (SJB) G. I. WANNA HOME - 1946 (MLC) A GEM OF A JAM - 1943 (MLC) THE GENTLEMAN MISBEHAVES - 1946 (SSH) GENTS IN A JAM - 1952 (MLS) GENTS WITHOUT CENTS - 1944 (MLC) THE GHOST TALKS - 1949 (MLS) GIVE A MAN A JOB - 1933 (SMH) GIVE US WINGS - 1940 (SSH) GLOVE SLINGERS - 1939 (SSH) GOBS OF FUN - 1933 (SSH) GOLD RAIDERS - 1951 (MLS) THE GOOD BAD EGG - 1947 (SJD) GOOD LUCK, MR. YATES - 1943 (MLC) GOOD OLD SOAK - 1937 (STH) GOOF ON THE ROOF - 1953 (MLS) GOOFS AND SADDLES - 1937 (MLC) GRIPS, GRUNTS, AND GROANS - 1937 (MLC) GUNS A POPPIN! - 1957 (MLJ) GYPPED IN THE PENTHOUSE - 1955 (MLS) HALF SHOT SHOOTERS - 1936 (MLC) HALF-WITS HOLIDAY - 1947 (MLC) HAND OF DEATH - 1962 (SJB) HAVE ROCKET -- WILL TRAVEL - 1959 (MLD) HE COOKED HIS GOOSE - 1952 (MLS) HEADIN' EAST - 1937 (SSH) HEADLINE HUNTERS - 1955 (SJB) HEALTHY, WEALTHY AND DUMB - 1938 (MLC) HEARST METROTONE NEWS Vol. 3 # 220 - 1931 (STH) HEAVENLY DAZE - 1948 (MLS) THE HELEN MORGAN STORY - 1957 (SJB) HELLO POP - 1933 (THS) HELLZAPOPPIN' - 1941 (SSH) HENRY THE ACHE - 1934 (SSH) HERE COMES FLOSSIE! - 1933 (SSH) HERE COMES THE BAND - 1935 (STH) HERE'S HOWE - 1936 (SSH) HEY MOE! HEY DAD! - 2015 (MISC) HEY, ROOKIE! - 1944 (SJB) HIGH SCHOOL HERO - 1946 (SJD) HIGHER THAN A KITE - 1943 (MLC) HIS FIRST FLAME - 1935 (SSH) HIT THE ROAD - 1941 (SSH) A HIT WITH A MISS - 1945 (SSH) HOI POLLOI - 1935 (MLC) HOKUS POKUS - 1949 (MLS) HOLD THAT GHOST - 1941 (SSH) HOLD THAT LION! - 1947 (MLS) HOLLYWOOD HOTEL - 1938 (STH) HOLLYWOOD MY HOME TOWN - 1962 (MLC) HOLLYWOOD ON PARADE # B-9 - 1934 (THS) HOLLYWOOD PARTY - 1934 (THS) HOLLYWOOD ROUND-UP - 1937 (SSH) HOME ON THE RAGE - 1938 (SSH) HOOFS AND GOOFS - 1957 (MLJ) HOOK A CROOK - 1955 (SJB) HOOSIER BOY MAKES GOOD - 1941 (SSH) HORSES' COLLARS - 1935 (MLC) HORSING AROUND - 1957 (MLJ) HOT ICE - 1955 (MLS) THE HOT SCOTS - 1948 (MLS) HOT STEEL - 1940 (SJB) HOT STUFF - 1956 (MLS) HOW HIGH IS UP? - 1940 (MLC) HOW'S ABOUT IT? - 1943 (SSH) HOWD' YA LIKE THAT? - 1934 (SSH) HUGS AND MUGS - 1950 (MLS) HULA-LA-LA - 1951 (MLS) HUSBANDS BEWARE - 1956 (MLS) I CAN HARDLY WAIT - 1943 (MLC) I SCREAM - 1934 (SSH) I'LL NEVER HEIL AGAIN - 1941 (MLC) I'M A MONKEY'S UNCLE - 1948 (MLS) I, THE JURY - 1953 (SJB) IDIOTS DELUXE - 1945 (MLC) IDLE ROOMERS - 1944 (MLC) IF A BODY MEETS A BODY - 1945 (MLC) IN THE DOUGH - 1933 (SSH) IN THE NAVY - 1941 (SSH) IN THE SWEET PIE AND PIE - 1941 (MLC) INCOME TAX SAPPY - 1954 (MLS) THE INVISIBLE WOMAN - 1940 (SSH) IT AIN'T HAY - 1943 (SSH) IT'S A MAD, MAD, MAD, MAD WORLD - 1963 (MLD) IT'S IN THE AIR - 1935 (STH) JAIL BIRDS OF PARADISE - 1934 (SMH_SCH) JERKS OF ALL TRADES - 1949 (MLS) JIGGERS, MY WIFE - 1946 (SSH) JITTER BUGHOUSE - 1948 (SJD) JOE PALOOKA MEETS HUMPHREY - 1950 (SJB) KEEP 'EM SLUGGING - 1943 (SSH) KICK ME AGAIN - 1937 (SSH) THE KNIFE OF THE PARTY - 1934 (SSH) KNUTZY KNIGHTS - 1954 (MLS) KOOK'S TOUR - 1970 (MLD) LAFF HOUR - 1956 (MLS) LAZY RIVER - 1934 (STH) THE LEATHERPUSHERS - 1940 (SSH) LET'S MAKE LOVE - 1960 (SJB) LISTEN, JUDGE - 1952 (MLS) LOCO BOY MAKES GOOD - 1942 (MLC) THE LONE WOLF MEETS A LADY - 1940 (SSH) THE LONGEST NIGHT - 1936 (STH) LOOSE LOOT - 1953 (MLS) THE LOST STOOGES - 1990 (THS) LOVE AT FIRST BITE - 1950 (MLS) LOVE IS A HEADACHE - 1938 (STH) LUCKY DEVILS - 1941 (SSH) MAD AT THE WORLD - 1955 (SJB) MAD HOLIDAY - 1936 (STH) MAD LOVE - 1935 (STH) MAKE LOVE, NOT WAR - 1970 (MISC) MALICE IN THE PALACE - 1949 (MLS) MAN OF THE PEOPLE - 1937 (STH) MATRI-PHONY - 1942 (MLC) MEET THE BARON - 1933 (THS) MEET THE CHUMP - 1941 (SSH) MEN IN BLACK - 1934 (MLC) MERRY MAVERICKS - 1951 (MLS) A MERRY MIX-UP - 1957 (MLJ) THE MGM THREE STOOGES FESTIVAL - 1983 (THS) MGM's THE BIG PARADE OF COMEDY - 1964 (THS) MICRO-PHONIES - 1945 (MLC) MILLIONAIRES IN PRISON - 1940 (SSH) A MISSED FORTUNE - 1952 (MLS) MISSISSIPPI GAMBLER - 1942 (SSH) MONEY SQUAWKS - 1940 (SSH) MONKEY BUSINESSMEN - 1946 (MLC) MOONLIGHT AND CACTUS - 1944 (SSH) MOVIE MANIACS - 1936 (MLC) MOVIETONE NEWS - 1933 (THS) MR. DYNAMITE - 1941 (SSH) MR. NOISY - 1946 (SSH) MUMMY'S DUMMIES - 1948 (MLS) MURDER IN THE FLEET - 1935 (STH) MURDER OVER NEW YORK - 1940 (SSH) MUSCLE UP A LITTLE CLOSER - 1957 (MLJ) MUSHROOMS - 1934 (SSH) MUSTY MUSKETEERS - 1954 (MLS) MUTTS TO YOU - 1938 (MLC) MY MUMMY'S ARMS - 1934 (SSH) MY SISTER EILEEN - 1942 (MLC) MYRT AND MARGE - 1933 (THS) NERTSERY RHYMES - 1933 (THS) THE NEW 3 STOOGES - 1965 (MLD) NEWS OF THE DAY Vol. 12 # 272 - 1941 (SSH) NEWS OF THE DAY - Days Are Flying 'Til Christmas - 1959 (MLD) NO CENSUS, NO FEELING - 1940 (MLC) NO DOUGH BOYS - 1944 (MLC) NOT GUILTY ENOUGH - 1938 (SSH) NUTTY BUT NICE - 1940 (MLC) OF CASH AND HASH - 1955 (MLS) OF HUMAN HEARTS - 1938 (STH) OFF AGAIN, ON AGAIN - 1945 (SSH) THE OFFICER'S MESS - 1935 (SSH) OIL'S WELL THAT ENDS WELL - 1958 (MLJ) OILY TO BED, OILY TO RISE - 1939 (MLC) ON THE WAGON - 1935 (SSH) ONE EXCITING WEEK - 1946 (SSH) OPEN SEASON FOR SAPS - 1944 (SSH) OPERATOR 13 - 1934 (STH_SCH) OUT WEST - 1947 (MLS) OUTER SPACE JITTERS - 1957 (MLJ) THE OUTLAWS IS COMING - 1965 (MLD) OUTSIDE THE WALL - 1950 (SJB) A PAIN IN THE PULLMAN - 1936 (MLC) PALS AND GALS - 1954 (MLS) PARDON MY BACKFIRE - 1953 (MLS) PARDON MY CLUTCH - 1948 (MLS) PARDON MY SCOTCH - 1935 (MLC) PARDON MY TERROR - 1946 (MISC) PARIS INTERLUDE - 1934 (STH) PAUL REVERE, JR. - 1933 (SSH) A PEACH OF A PAIR - 1934 (SSH) PEOPLE ARE FUNNY - 1946 (SJD) PEST MAN WINS - 1951 (MLS) PHONY EXPRESS - 1943 (MLC) PICK A PECK OF PLUMBERS - 1944 (SSH) PIES AND GUYS - 1958 (MLJ) PITTSBURGH - 1942 (SSH) PLANE NUTS - 1933 (THS) PLAYING THE PONIES - 1937 (MLC) PLEASED TO MITT YOU - 1940 (SSH) THE PLUNDERERS OF PAINTED FLATS - 1959 (SJB) POP GOES THE EASEL - 1935 (MLC) PRIVATE BUCKAROO - 1942 (SSH) THE PRIZEFIGHTER AND THE LADY - 1933 (THS) PUGS AND KISSES - 1934 (SSH) PUNCH AND BEAUTY - 1936 (SSH) PUNCH DRUNKS - 1934 (MLC) PUNCHY COWPUNCHERS - 1950 (MLS) PURE FEUD - 1934 (SSH) QUIZ WHIZZ - 1958 (MLJ) RAMBLING 'ROUND RADIO ROW # 7 (Series 2 # 1) - 1934 (SSH) RECKLESS - 1935 (STH) RESTLESS KNIGHTS - 1935 (MLC) RHYTHM AND WEEP - 1946 (MLC) RIP, SEW, AND STITCH - 1953 (MLS) ROAD SHOW - 1941 (SSH) ROAST-BEEF AND MOVIES - 1934 (SCH) ROCKIN' IN THE ROCKIES - 1945 (MLC) ROCKIN' THRU THE ROCKIES - 1940 (MLC) THE ROOKIE - 1959 (SJB) RUMPUS IN THE HAREM - 1956 (MLS) RUSTY ROMEOS - 1957 (MLJ) THE SAILOR TAKES A WIFE - 1945 (SJD) SALT WATER DAFFY - 1933 (SSH) SAN ANTONIO ROSE - 1941 (SSH) SAN FRANCISCO - 1936 (STH) SAPPY BULL FIGHTERS - 1959 (MLJ) SAVAGE INTRUDER - 1969 (SJB) SAVED BY THE BELLE - 1939 (MLC) SAY ONE FOR ME - 1959 (SJB) SCHEMING SCHEMERS - 1956 (MLS) SCOTCHED IN SCOTLAND - 1954 (MLS) SCRAMBLED BRAINS - 1951 (MLS) SCREEN SNAPSHOTS Series 13 # 5 - 1933 (THS) SCREEN SNAPSHOTS Series 14 # 1 - 1934 (MLC) SCREEN SNAPSHOTS Series 14 # 2 - 1934 (MLC) SCREEN SNAPSHOTS Series 14 # 6 - 1935 (MLC) SCREEN SNAPSHOTS Series 15 # 7 - 1936 (MLC) SCREEN SNAPSHOTS Series 18 # 9 - 1939 (MLC) SCREEN SNAPSHOTS Series 19 # 5 - 1940 (MLC) SCREEN SNAPSHOTS Series 19 # 6 - 1940 (MLC) SCREEN SNAPSHOTS Series 20 # 3 - 1940 (MLC) SCREEN SNAPSHOTS Series 21 # 2 - 1941 (STH) SCREEN SNAPSHOTS Series 21 # 3 - 1941 (MLC) SCREEN SNAPSHOTS Series 22 # 8 - 1943 (MLC) SELF MADE MAIDS - 1950 (MLS) SENIOR PROM - 1958 (SMH) SERVES YOU RIGHT - 1935 (SSH) SHIVERING SHERLOCKS - 1948 (MLS) SHOT IN THE FRONTIER - 1954 (MLS) THE SILENT CALL - 1961 (SJB) SING A SONG OF SIX PANTS - 1947 (MLS) SING, BABY, SING - 1936 (STH) SINS OF JEZEBEL - 1953 (SJB) THE SITTER DOWNERS - 1937 (MLC) SIX LESSONS FROM MADAME LA ZONGA - 1941 (SSH) SLAPHAPPY SLEUTHS - 1950 (MLS) SLAPPILY MARRIED - 1946 (SJD) SLIPPERY SILKS - 1936 (MLC) SMOKED HAMS - 1934 (SSH) A SNITCH IN TIME - 1950 (MLS) SNOW WHITE AND THE THREE STOOGES - 1961 (MLD) SO LONG MR. CHUMPS - 1941 (MLC) SO YOU WON'T T-T-T-TALK - 1934 (SSH) SOCIETY MUGS - 1946 (SSH) SOCK-A-BYE BABY - 1942 (MLC) SOME MORE OF SAMOA - 1941 (MLC) SOUP TO NUTS - 1930 (THS) SPACE MASTER X-7 - 1958 (SMH) SPACE SHIP SAPPY - 1957 (MLJ) SPEED - 1936 (STH) SPIES AND GUYS - 1953 (SJB) SPOOK LOUDER - 1943 (MLC) SPOOKS! - 1953 (MLS) SQUAREHEADS OF THE ROUND TABLE - 1948 (MLS) STAGE MOTHER - 1933 (STH_SLF) STAR SPANGLED SALESMAN - 1968 (MLD) START CHEERING - 1938 (MLC) STEEL PIER, ATLANTIC CITY, NJ - 1938 (MLC) STONE AGE ROMEOS - 1955 (MLS) STOOGEMANIA - 1986 (MISC) THE STOOGEPHILE TRIVIA MOVIE - 1987 (MISC) STOOGES: THE MEN BEHIND THE MAYHEM - 1994 (MISC) STOP! LOOK! AND LAUGH! - 1960 (MLC) STOP, SADIE, STOP - 1933 (STH) THE STORY ON PAGE ONE - 1959 (SJB) STRANGE AFFAIR - 1944 (SSH) THE STRANGE CASE OF DR. RX - 1942 (SSH) STRICTLY IN THE GROOVE - 1942 (SSH) STUDIO STOOPS - 1950 (MLS) SURPRISE, SURPRISE - 1937 (MLC) SWEET AND HOT - 1958 (MLJ) SWING PARADE OF 1946 - 1946 (MLC) TAKING THE COUNT - 1937 (SSH) TALK ABOUT A LADY - 1946 (SJB) TASSELS IN THE AIR - 1938 (MLC) TERMITES OF 1938 - 1938 (MLC) THANK YOUR LUCKY STARS - 1943 (SJD) THEY STOOGE TO CONGA - 1943 (MLC) THREE ARABIAN NUTS - 1951 (MLS) THREE DARK HORSES - 1952 (MLS) THREE HAMS ON RYE - 1950 (MLS) THREE LITTLE BEERS - 1935 (MLC) THREE LITTLE PIGSKINS - 1934 (MLC) THREE LITTLE PIRATES - 1946 (MLC) THREE LITTLE SEW AND SEWS - 1939 (MLC) THREE LITTLE TWIRPS - 1943 (MLC) THREE LOAN WOLVES - 1946 (MLC) THREE MISSING LINKS - 1938 (MLC) THREE PESTS IN A MESS - 1945 (MLC) THREE SAPPY PEOPLE - 1939 (MLC) THREE SMART SAPS - 1942 (MLC) THE THREE STOOGES 75th ANNIVERSARY SPECIAL - 2003 (MISC) THE THREE STOOGES FAMILY ALBUM - 1998 (MISC) THREE STOOGES FUN-O-RAMA - 1959 (MLJ) THE THREE STOOGES GO AROUND THE WORLD IN A DAZE - 1963 (MLD) THE THREE STOOGES GREATEST HITS! - 1997 (MISC) THE THREE STOOGES IN ORBIT - 1962 (MLD) THE THREE STOOGES MEET HERCULES - 1962 (MLD) THE THREE STOOGES SCRAPBOOK - 1960 (MLD) THE THREE STOOGES SCRAPBOOK - 1963 (MLD) THREE STOOGES SCRAPBOOK, THE: The Spain Mutiny - 1963 (MLD) THE THREE STOOGES - 2000 (MISC) THE THREE TROUBLEDOERS - 1946 (MLC) TIGHT SHOES - 1941 (SSH) TIME OUT FOR RHYTHM - 1941 (MLC) TOO MANY BLONDES - 1941 (SSH) THE TOOTH WILL OUT - 1951 (MLS) TRICKY DICKS - 1953 (MLS) TRIPLE CROSSED - 1959 (MLJ) TROUBLE CHASERS - 1945 (SSH) TURN BACK THE CLOCK - 1933 (THS) TWO-GUN LADY - 1956 (SJB) UNCIVIL WAR BIRDS - 1946 (MLC) UNCIVIL WARRIORS - 1935 (MLC) UP IN DAISY'S PENTHOUSE - 1953 (MLS) VAGABOND LOAFERS - 1949 (MLS) VARSITY SHOW - 1937 (STH) VERY CLOSE VEINS - 1934 (SSH) VIOLENT IS THE WORD FOR CURLY - 1938 (MLC) WAITING IN THE LURCH - 1949 (SJB) WE MUST DO OUR BEST - 1909 (SMH) WE WANT OUR MUMMY - 1939 (MLC) WEDLOCK DEADLOCK - 1947 (SJD) WEE WEE MONSIEUR - 1938 (MLC) WHAM-BAM-SLAM! - 1955 (MLS) WHAT'S THE MATADOR? - 1942 (MLC) WHERE THE PEST BEGINS - 1945 (SSH) WHERE THERE'S A WILL - 1948 (MLS) WHICH WAY TO THE FRONT? - 1970 (SJB) WHILE THE CAT'S AWAY - 1936 (SSH) WHO DONE IT? - 1949 (MLS) WHOOPS, I'M AN INDIAN! - 1936 (MLC) WHY PAY RENT? - 1935 (SSH) THE WINNING TICKET - 1935 (STH) WISE GUYS PREFER BRUNETTES - 1926 (STH) WITH SIX YOU GET EGGROLL - 1968 (SJB) WOMAN HATERS - 1934 (MLC) WOMAN IN HIDING - 1950 (SJB) WOMAN WANTED - 1935 (STH) THE WOODCUTTER'S HOUSE - 1959 (SJB) THE WRONG, WRONG TRAIL - 1934 (SSH) YES, WE HAVE NO BONANZA - 1939 (MLC) THE YOKE'S ON ME - 1944 (MLC) YOU NAZTY SPY! - 1940 (MLC)

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Book of the Day

Schtick Figures (The Cool, the Comical, the Crazy)

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Comic of the Day

The March of Comics # 248 (1963, Western / K. K.)

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