Schtick Figures (The Cool, the Comical, the Crazy)
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Featuring Moe Howard (Solo)
83 min. (Feature Film)
Short order cook Charlie Yuckapuck (Morey Amsterdam) and his waitress best friend Annie (Rose Marie) are fired from the Daredevil Diner after one too many disasters at the expense of owner Mr. Travis (Richard Deacon). The two head for Updyke College to help waitress Magda Anders run the bookstore she inherited from her uncle. On their trail are spies from the Socialist Republic of Klobayashi who have mistaken Charlie for his exact double, missing cosmonaut Yasha Nudnick. Yasha has defected, with plans to turn himself over to U.S. officials at Updyke's international science exposition. Klobayashi spy leader Mr. Big orders his staff to retrieve the space secrets in Nudnick's head, by torture if necessary.
Moe Howard guest stars as Mr. Raines, a lawyer, sporting his trademark sugar-bowl haircut.
A hodgepodge of tired sight gags and bad jokes, not even a few funny cameo appearances are able to inject any sense into this mess.
Irene Ryan's cameo features her as THE BEVERLY HILLBILLIES 'Granny.'
Morey Amsterdam
Charlie Yuckapuck
Rose Marie
Annie
January Jones
Magda Anders
Richard Deacon
Mr. Travis
Moe Howard
Mr. Raines
Michael Ford
Jim Holliston
Richard Deacon
Updyke Police Chief
Henry Corden
Prof. Lerowski
Jack Heller
Mr. Big
Tim Herbert
Comrade Seed
Carmen Phillips
Comrade Olga
Cliff Arquette
Charley Weaver foreign agent
Peggy Mondo
Fat lady foreign assassin
Nick Adams
Foreign agent
Max 'Slapsie' Rosenbloom
Foreign agent
Joey Adams
1st burglar
Andy Albin
2nd burglar
Danny Thomas
Man in diner
Forrest Tucker
Man in diner
Percy Helton
Little fat man in diner
Irene Ryan
Granny Daisy Moses
Milton Berle
Man with rope
Carl Reiner
Man with toupee
Steve Allen
Man in bookstore
Yan Shan Tung
Chinese French woman
Tim Herbert
Semu
Annazette Chase
Student
Arline Hunter
Student
Greg Amsterdam
Student
Darryl Vaughan
Student athlete
LaRue Farlow
Lover
Joe Ploski
Diner customer
Harmon Jones
Director
Aubrey Schenck
Executive Producer
Morey Amsterdam
Producer
Hal Klein
Associate Producer
George Schenck
Adaptation
William Marks
Adaptation
John Hart
Screenplay
Morey Amsterdam
Screenplay
Brick Marquard
Director of Photography
Robert C. Jones
Film Editor
Rolland M. Brooks
Art Director
Howard Hollander
Art Director
Jerry D. Welch
Set Decorator
Burdick S. Trask
Sound
Richard LaSalle
Music Composer
Richard LaSalle
Music Conductor
Dick Harris
Music Editor
Margaret Makau
Costumes
Gustaf Norin
Makeup Artist
Elaine Stone
Hair Stylist
Read Killgore
Assistant Director
Del Harris
Sound Effects
Harry Sundby
Chief Set Electrician
Glenn Ross
Property Master
Frank DeMarco
Special Effects
Lawrence W. Butler
Photographic Effects
Donald C. Glouner
Photographic Effects
Marjorie Mullen
Script Supervisor
There aren't any production notes logged for this episode.
No audio files are available for this episode.
"DON'T WORRY, WE'LL THINK OF A TITLE:" MOSES HORWITZ SOLO FEATURE: RELEASED ON: MAY 01, 1966:
CAST MEMBER NAMES AND THEIR ROLES: {MAIN NAMES ARE IN PARENTHESES BY THEIR STAGE NAMES}:
This feature starts off at the Daredevil Diner where we see Magda Anders {NAME: JANUARY JONES} standing there with a serious look on her face as she is putting a refil on a customer's coffee cup.
We now see Mr. Travis {NAME: RICHARD DEACON} the manager of the Daredevil Diner standing in front of the cash register that shows a sale of 7$.20¢ as he has a serious look on his face as he is completing some paperwork. While Annie {NAME: ROSE MARIE} is in the background taking a customer's order and Magda is now making a frest pot of coffee. We also see Charile Yuckapuck, {NAME: MOREY AMSTERDAM} the diner's short ordure cook busy at decorating a cake for Mr. Travis' birthday. He is now putting on the edge trim of his cake as his icing tube has clogged with icing. He is looking at his decorating tube with a mad look on his face as he is pounding the handle of the tube trying to dislodge the stuck icing as he is now getting the tube to work sending icing flying and is hitting Mr. Travis right in the kisser with the icing.
Mr. Travis is now still working on his paperwork as he is looking up at Charlie with a mad look on his face about being squirted with the icing. Charlie is now looking at Mr. Travis wide-eyed and with a scared look on his face. Annie has now noticed that Charlie has squirted Mr. Travis with the icing as she is standing there completing a customer's order with her mout agait and her eyes bugging out of her head as she has a scared look on her face. We als see Magda standing there holding onto a coffee pot as she also has noticed the icing flinging fiasco as she is also standing there with her mouth agait and a look of hurt and worry on her face.
Mr. Travis is now removing his spectacles from his face as he still has icing on his face and is looking at Charlie with a dumbfounded look on his face. Charlie is now looking at Mr. Travis with a scared look on his face as his eyes are bugging out of his face in scaredness as he is now ducking behind his cake in fear. We now see Annie standing there looking once again at Charlie and Mr. Travis with a really hurt and scared look on her face.
Mr. Travis has now taken his handkerchief and has wiped a bit of icing off of his nowse in a state of madness as he is still standing there with a really perplexed look on his face as he is looking at Charlie.
We now see Magda standing there and huntched over as she is quickly pouring a cup of coffee in a state of panic as she is taking it over to Mr. Travis to cool him off at being mad at Charlie for squirting his with icing.
MAGDA to MR. TRAVIS: (As she is walking over to him in a quick stride and has a perplexed look on her face as she is saying to him in a really carrying tone of voice): "Here you are Mr. Travis, a nice hot cup of coffee, it'll cool you off!"
MR. TRAVIS to MAGDA: (As he is giving her a quick smile as he is taking the cup of coffee from her and says to her in a really happy tone of voice as he still has icing on his kisser): "Thank-you, Magda, I'm glad to see someone around here has some respect for the boss!"
While Mr. Travis was taking the coffee from Magda she was standing there smiling happily as poor Charlie is still taking cover behind his cake in a state of fear as he is looking at Mr. Travis wide-eyed and a look of panic on his face.
MAGDA to MR. TRAVIS: (As she is talking to Mr. Travis in a low and carrying tone of voice as she is deffending Charlie): "I'm sure Charlie didn't mean it, he's just like a little kid."
MR. TRAVIS to MAGDA: (As he is standing there still with icing on his face, holding his cup of coffee and has a mad look on his face as he is slightly yelling at her in madness about Charlie): "Well, tell him to grow-up!"
We now see both Magda and Mr. Travis looking at Charlie. Magda has a look of hurt on her face and Mr. Travis, still with icing on his face and holding onto his coffee cup as he is looking at Charlie with a mean and mad look on his face.
MR. TRAVIS to CHARLIE: (As he is saying to Charlie in a slightly mad but yet slightly forgiving tone of voice): "All right Charlie, get back to work and be more careful from now on."
CHARLIE to MR. TRAVIS: (As he is now standing up from behind his cake with a wide-eyed and scared look on his face as he is using a scared and stammering voice says as he now salutes Mr. Travis): "Yeah, yeah, yes sir, yeah, yeah, yes sir, yes your majesty, yes sir!"
MR. TRAVIS to MADGA: (As he is giving her a perplexed look and is using a serious tone of voice as he is now wiping the rest of the icing from his face and has finished his cup of coffee says to her): "Watch the store!"
We now see Mr. Travis exiting the diner as Charlie is now approaching his short ordure grillé and is picking up his spatula as Annie is now approaching him with a look of worry on her face as she is holding her ordure pad and ink pen as she is patting Charlie on his back. Charlie is now turning around and looking at Annie with a worried look on his face.
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is talking to him in a really mad voice and with a look of madness on her face as she states): "You better watch it Charlie, or old beach head will throw all of us out on our ears." "SCRAMBLE TWO!"
Charlie is now at his grillé as he is cracking a couple of eggs and is scrambling thim with a scared look on his face as Annie is standing next to him with a perplexed look on her face as she is writing on her ordure pad.
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he is busy at his grillé completing his cackle fruit ordure says in a professional voice and a serious look on his face): "Scramble two, coming up!"
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As Charlie is taking a pat of butter and melting it on his grillé as he turns and gives Annie a quick worried glance as he is saying in a mad tone of voice): "Well, he's always making trouble!"
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is looking at Charlie with a mad look on her face as she is still holding her ordure pad and ink pen as Charlie has now turned around as he is glarring at her with his eyes bugging out of his head in a state of panic as Annie is waving her hands in a state of madness and is using a mad tone of voice says): "He's always making trouble, you could start a fight in an empty room, now watch it will ya Charlie, we all need the job!"
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he is holding his spatula and is using hand gestures to show hurt and worry as he is looking at her with a really petrified and scared look on his face as he says to her in a hurtful tone of voice): "I'll watch it, I'll watch it!"
As Charlie was cracking his cackle fruit on the grillé we now see a distinguished looking gentleman walking into the diner smoking a stogie and is taking a seat at the snack bar counter closest to the entrance door, {NAME: DANNY THOMAS}.
ANNIE to MALE CUSTOMER {ONE}: (As he is sitting down with a really happy look on his face as she is approaching him with her ordure pad and a huge smile on her face as she asks): "Oh, what will it be today, sir?"
MALE CUSTOMER {ONE} to ANNIE: (As he is sitting there with a mischievous smile on his face and says in a mischievous tone of voice): "Give me a hamburger, and close the window!"
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she has a determined look on her face as she is shouting at Charlie): "One hamburger......?"
ANNIE to the MALE CUSTOMER {ONE}: (As she is now turning back in his direction and is looking at him with a look of wonderment and says to him in a questionable tone of voice): "And close the window?"
MALE CUSTOMER {ONE} to ANNIE: (In a really serious and low tone of voice says): "That's right!"
CHARLIE to MALE CUSTOMER {ONE}: (As Charlie is now looking at him with a look of dismay on his face and is saying to him in a mischievous voice): "Gee, that's funny, most people ask me to open the window!"
Annie is standing there writing down his hamburger ordure with a really surprised look on her face.
MALE CUSTOMER {ONE} to CHARLIE: (As he is sitting there with his stogie in his mouth, a look of mischief on his face and says in a mischievous voice): "Yeha, well, you close the window this time. The hamburger I had yesterday blew off the plate three times."
We now see Charlie with a really blank and dumb look on his face as Annie is standing there laughing at his hamburger joke.
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is standing there smiling at the customer and says to Charlie in a laughing voice): "Haaa, haaa, haaa, haaa, haaa, haaa, haaa, haaa, okay, hey Charlie one hamburger only this time put meat in it!"
CHARLIE to ANNIE and the MALE CUSTOMER {ONE}: (As Charlie is looking at them with a wicked but yet mischievous look on his face as he is saying to them in a mischievous voice): "That'll be extra!"
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is waving a hand at the customer and is resting her head on her shoulder as she is looking at Charlie smiling and with a huge mischievous grin on her face as she is using a mischievous tone of voice says): "Why not, he's a big spender, haaa-heee!"
Annie is now leaning on the snack bar counter looking at him with a mischievous look on her face as he is looking back at her with a look of dismay on his face as she is waving her hand.
ANNIE to MALE CUSTOMER {ONE}: (As she is looking at him with a suggestive look on her face and is saying to him in a suggestive and helpful tone of voice): "Are you sure you wouldn't like something else, how about some nice, roast chicken?"
MALE CUSTOMER {ONE} to ANNIE: (As he is sitting there holding onto his stogie and is smiling at her in glee as he is saying to her in a happy voice): "Roast chicken, say that sounds good!"
ANNIE to MALE CUSTOMER {ONE}: (As she pats him on his arm and is smiling at him mischievously and is using a mischievous tone of voice says): "Wait, I'll see if we have any!"
We now see the Male Customer {One} sitting at the snack bar counter with a really dumbfounded look on his face.
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is no turining in Charlie's direction with a look of bewilderment on her face as she is asking Charlie in a mischievous but yet questionable tone of voice): "Charlie, we got any roast chicken?"
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he is looking at her with a look of puzzlement on his face as he is waving a finger at her and answers her back in a voice of dismay): "Roast chicken? just a minute, I'll cheque the chicken!"
Charlie is now setting down his spatula and is approaching the oven and is opening it to see if they have any roasted chicken as we see a live chicken come flying out of the over. As we see the chicken flying out of the oven and is hitting the Male Customer {One} in his face causing him to have a really hurt look on his face.
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As Annie is standing by Charlie with a mischievous look on her face as Charlie is standing there with a look of dismay and worry on his face as she says): "Oh, well, I guess we better take roast chicken off the menu!"
MALE CUSTOMER {ONE} to ANNIE and CHARLIE: (As he has a really worried look on his face and is using a worried and scared tone of voice as he is now getting up and running out of the diner): "Boy, I'm not gonna eat in a joint like this!"
CHARLIE to MALE CUSTOMER {ONE}: (As Charlie is looking at him with a mad and perplexed look on his face as he is saying to him in a mad tone of voice): "Good thinking!"
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she has now hit Charlie on his arm and is giving him a mad look as she is whispering to him in a mad voice): "Oh, come on!"
Charlie is now looking at Annie with a really wicked looking grin on his face as she is now walking away from him.
We now see Charlie with a wicked but yet mischievous look on his face as he returns to his grillé.
Annie is now walking in a brisk and happy stride as she is looking at him with a mischievous smile on her face as we see another 'Fat Male Customer', {NAME: PERCY HELTON}, taking his napkin and is tucking it in under his chin.
ANNIE to the LITTLE FAT MALE CUSTOMER: (As she is looking at him in dismay as she is holding her ordure pad in one hand and is propping up her ink pen against he chin as she asks him in a mischievous voice): "Well, what will it be sir, a shave or a haircut?"
LITTLE FAT MALE CUSTOMER to ANNIE: (As he is holding the menu and looking at it with a look of wonderment on his face as he is asking her in a questionable tone of voice): "Do you have any soup on the menu?"
ANNIE to the LITTLE FAT MALE CUSTOMER: (As she now has a really mischievous look on her face and is answering him back in a mischievous tone of voice as she is laughing at him mischievously): "Yeah, we did have, but we wiped it off, haaa, haaa, haaa, haaa, haaa, haaa. Yeah, we have soup. We have chicken soup with vegetables or vegetable soup with chicken."
LITTLE FAT MALE CUSTOMER to ANNIE: (As he looking at her with a really perplexed look on his face as he is asking her in a questionable tone of voice): "What's the difference?"
ANNIE to the LITTLE FAT MALE CUSTOMER: (As she is pointing her ink pen and has a mischievous look on her face and is using a mischieovus voice says): "Only, your chicken plucker knows, haaa, haaa, haaa, haaa, haaa, haaa, haaa, haaa, haaa, haaa!"
LITTLE FAT MALE CUSTOMER to ANNIE: (As he is waving a hand at her and is giving her a slight smile and says to her in a playful tone of voice): "All right, girlie, I'll take any kind of soup you have!"
ANNIE to the LITTLE FAT MALE CUSTOMER: (As she is writing his soup ordure down and is smiling at him mischievously as she is using a happy tone of voice says): "Oh, good!"
We are now on Charlie where we see him standing in front of serving soup pail as he is mixing it up with a look of seriousness on his face.
We now see Annie approaching behind the counter to get the Little Fat Male Customer his soup as we see Charlie moving back the curtain on his window with a look of bewilderment on his face as we are now hearing the roaring of thunder.
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he is now looking out the window with a blank look on his face as he is saying to her nonchalantly): "Humnh, it looks like rain!"
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is ladeling out the soup says to him in full blown mischievous state as she take a quick sniff of the soup says): "Funny, smells like soup!"
We now see Charlie bent over his chopping board with his eyes popping out of his head as he is shrugging his shoulders and is looking at Annie who is walking away with the bowl of soup with a really dumbfounded look on his face.
ANNIE to the LITTLE FAT MALE CUSTOMER: (As she is setting down the bowl of soup in front of him says to him with a happy smile on her and in a happy tone of voice): "There you are, anything else sir?"
LITTLE FAT MALE CUSTOMER to ANNIE: (As he is looking at her with a dazed look on his face as he is saying to her in a mean tone of voice): "I'll have a Minute Steak, New York Cut, hunh, rare on the inside, well done on the outside, hunh, trim off the fat, and no salt!"
Annie is now nodding her head in agreement as she is now writing down the steak ordure.
ANNIE to the LITTLE FAT MALE CUSTOMER: (As she is waving her ink pen at him and has a look mischief on her face as she is saying in a mischievous tone of voice): "Yeah, come in tomorrow for a fitting!"
The Little Fat Male Customer just gave Annie a look of madness as she has now looked at him with look of whatever as she has now given him a worried smile.
Charlie is now taking his spatula and is happily scraping off his grillé as Annie is approaching him in a happy mood.
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is walking up to Charlie and shouts to him in a serious voice): "One steak!:
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he has a look of seriousness on his face and says in a professional voice): "One steak, coming up!"
Annie is now taking a coffee pot from the burner as Charlie is now going into a refrigerated drawer and getting out a Minute Steak as we also see Magda approaching Charlie.
MAGDA to CHARLIE: (As she is now approaching Charlie in a happy mooe as she is saying to him in a serious voice): "Ordure of Hotcakes!"
CHARLIE to MAGDA: (As he is standing in front of his grillé busy at work with a blank look on his face says): "One ordure of hotcakes coming down!"
We now see Mr. Travis standing in front of the snack bar counter with a look of bewilderment on his face as he is standing there with his mouth agait. We now see on the cash register a sale of 2.00$. Magda is now approaching Mr. Travis with a sweet smile on her face.
MAGDA to MR. TRAVIS: (As she is approaching him in a very professional manner says): "Oh, Mr. Travis, I noticed we're running a little low on supplies, you better call Acme and ordure this stuff!"
Magda has now handed to Mr. Travis a slip of paper with the supplies that are needed written on it.
MR. TRAVIS to MAGDA: (As he is now analyzing the supplies list with a serious look on his face as he replies back in a low and monotone voice): "All right, thank-you!"
We now see Mr. Travis walking behind Charlie who is busy at making his griddle cakes as Mr. Travis is looking at the supplies list in a serious state.
MR. TRAVIS to CHARLIE: (As he is holding up an empty salt shaker and has a mad look on his face as he is shouting at Charlie madly): "Charlie, this morning, I told you to fill the salt shakers!"
CHARLIE to MR. TRAVIS: (As Charlie is holding his spatula and is looking at Mr. Travis with a look of worry on his face as he is saying to Mr. Travis in a worried voice as he is pointing at the salt shaker): "Do you think it's easy to push the salt through those little holes?"
MR. TRAVIS to CHARLIE: (As he is looking at Charlie with a look of bewilderment on his face and is saying to Charlie in a worried voice): "You know, sometimes I look at you and wonder, and other times I don't look, I just wonder!"
Charlie now has a look of scaredness and worry on his face as he has now flipped one of his griddle cakes and it goes flying landing on top of Mr. Travis' head. Mr. Travis now has a look of puzzlement on his face as he looks at the griddle cake on his head.
CHARLIE to MR. TRAVIS: (As Charlie is holding his spatula with a devilsh look on his face as he says to him in a worried but yer mischievous voice): "Hey, that looks great on you, wait a minute, here, try some of this greasy kid stuff!" {Charlie has now taken a pat of butter and has put it on the griddle cake on Mr. Travis' head}.
MR. TRAVIS to CHARLIE: (As he is standing there looking at Charlie with a really evil and wicked look on his face as he is saying to Charlie n a mean and sarcastic voice as he is now taking the griddle cake and butter pat from his head and is throwing it on the floor): "Get back to work!"
CHARLIE to MR. TRAVIS: (As Charlie now has a really scared look on his face as he ducking from Mr. Travis in a really hurtful state as he is saying to him in a scared and stammering voice): "Yes sir, yes sir, your majesty!"
We now see Charlie holding onto his spatula with a mischievous look of glee on his face as we see sauntering into the diner the saultery, seductive and beautiful German Secret Agent Comrade Olga. {NAME: CARMEN PHILLIPS}. She is dressed in a knee length sunflower patterend dress, white pocketbook on her arm, long sleeved white turtlneck shirt, several large silver chains around her neck, a white straw hat with flowers on it, {which on the top big flower supported a spy camera}, plus she is also wearing a pair of sun spectacles trimmed with silver rhinestones, as on the left side ear bar there is also a hidden spy camera. Plus she has a really long cigarette holder with a lit cigarette in it.
We now see Charlie wiping of his hands as he has a huge smile on his face as he is walking up to her in a happy manner.
CHARLIE to COMRADE OLGA: (As he is now standing in front of her with a sheepish, but yet slightly embarrassed look on his face says to her in a really happy voice): "Good morning!"
COMRADE OLGA to CHARLIE: (As she is sitting down at the snack bar counter with the cigarette holder in her mouth as she is looking at him in a flirtatious, sultery, and seductive manner says in a saultery voice): "Hi cutie, what looks good in the kitchen?"
CHARLIE to COMRADE OLGA: (As Charlie is now leaning on the snack counter bar with a really happy and sheepish look on his face and is using a sweet mischievous tone of voice): "The dishwasher, he just took a bath!"
COMRADE OLGA to CHARLIE: (As she is looking at him seductively and is using a low and saultery voice says): "Aren't you cute, ah, listen, think I could have duck eggs?"
CHARLIE to COMRADE OLGA: (As he is still leaning on the snack bar counter looking at her with a devilsh look on his face as his eyes are popping out of his head and he has a devilsh smile on his face as he says to her in a mischievous voice): "You could, if you were a duck!"
COMRADE OLGA to CHARLIE: (As she is sitting there with a really saultery and seductive look on her face and is using a seductive and bewitching tone of voice says as she flips her head and is still holding her cigarette holder in a seductive state says): "Oh well, I guess I'll settle for coffee!"
CHARLIE to COMRADE OLGA: (As he is now totally mesmerized by her seductive ways as he is smiling at her sweetly and says to her in a flirtatious voice as he is walking to get her, her cup of coffee as he has a look of glee on his face): "One cup of coffee coming up!"
We now see Comrade Olga sitting there with a really evil look on her face as she is now tapping the left bow of her spectacles twice as she has now taken two photoshots of Charlie.
CHARLIE to COMRADE OLGA: (As he has now given her the cup of coffee as he has a really sheepish but yet a look of love on his face as he is saying to her in a really mesmerized tone of voice): "There you are, honey!"
COMRADE OLGA to CHARLIE: (As she is sitting there using a low and sexy style of voice as she has a devilsh, saultery look on her face): "Thank-you, lover!"
Comrade Olga is now adjusting her spectacles so she can be able to get better photoshots of Charlie as Charlie is standing in front of the waving his hand as he is now nodding his head from side to side as he is smiling at her with a really cute grin on his face. As he is putting his hand up to his face and is waving it in a playful state.
{Before we go any further with Comrade Olga and her gang of German Secret Agents. I just want to quickly mention that the reason they are spying on Charlie is that they think Charlie is a missing cosmonaut by the name of 'Yasha Nudnick', who has a bunch of secret Government documents that they want. Charlie and Yasha are spitting images of one another}.
We are now in the main headquarters of the German Secret Agents where they are observing Charlie {Yasha} who has a really dumb look on his face with a sweet a sheepish smile on his face as they are observing Charlie {Yasha} on a television screen.
We are now seeing a bunch of dead beat looking agents sitting at a long half-moon shapped desk observing Charlie with looks of half asleep bewilderment on their faces. We are now on Adolf Hitler and Field Marshall Goering sitting there with looks of boredom on their faces as they are now about to fall asleep.
We now see the kissers of three more 'good looking secret agents,' {with one of them being a fat female assassinist} all sitting there looking like they are half slaushed out and are about to fall asleep. We are now on the last bunch of good looking dimwits as we see them also totally bored out of their gourds and falling asleep as one of them is "Secret Agent Charlie Weaver" {NAME: CHARLIE ARQUETTE} as he is taking his handkerchief from his pocket and is blowing his nose loudly with it.
We are now on "Commader In Chief" {"MR. BIG"} { NAME: JACK HELLER} as he is sitting there smoking a huge stogie as we see a giant sign on the wall behind him that reads "THE" BUTTON and the Commander's body guard is standing with a blank and half asleep look on his face. He is now thoroughly observing Charlie, {Yasha} as he has now come to the {wrong} conclusion.
MR. BIG to COMRADE OLGA: (As he is in a total state of glee and is shouting to her in a low and gleeful voice): "Yes, that's him, Yasha Nudnick, the missing cosmonaut, good work Comrade Olga, Comrade Olga?"
We now see Comrade Olga sitting there with a really saultery look on her face as she is tapping on her spectacles bow as she is now taking several more photoshots of Charlie, {ooops, Yasha Nudnick, as they call him}.
MR. BIG to COMRADE OLGA. (As she has now sent several more photoshots of Charlie {Yasha} to him): "I understand, now don't let him out of your sight, photograph everyone he talks too!"
CHARLIE to COMRADE OLGA: (As Charlie is looking at her with a really mesmerized look of love on his face as he is saying to her in a carrying tone of voice): "I think your glasses need a grease job!"
MR. BIG to CHARLIE {YASHA}: (As he is sitting at his desk with a look of evil wonderment on his face says in a mean tone of voice): "I'm glad you agree, disguise yourself, I'll send Comrade Seed along to help you, good luck!"
We now see Comrade Olga sitting at the snack bar counter with a wicked a sultrey look on her face as she is still snapping photoshots of Charlie {Yasha} with her camera spectacles.
MR. BIG to HIS GROUP OF SPIES: (As he is sitting there looking at them with a dazed and mischievous look as he is saying to these dead beat spies in a serious voice): "Comrade Olga has spotted Yasha Nudnick, you have your instructions, remember I want him alive!"
We now see Mr. Big's band of spies sitting at their desks with half tired and beat out looks on their faces as they are raising their hands in agreement to what he has said.
We are now back in the diner where we see Charlie, {Yasha}, standing there with a sweet and sheepish smile on his face as he is holding his hands together as he is flirting with Comrade Olga and now knowing that he is being photoshot thinking he is a wanted cosmonaut spy.
We now see Comrade Olga sitting at the snack bar counter with a mischievous and devious look on her face as she has a finger on the camera button of her spectacles as Charlie, {Yasha} is now standing there with a sweet and mesmerized look on his face as he is taking a small oil can and is oiling her glasses to help eliminate what he thinks is a squeek in her spectacles all the while he is taking photoshots of himself, {unannounced}.
We are now back on the Little Fat Male Customer, the one who ordured the Minute Steak as he is sitting there with a look of madness on his face as he is trying to cut his very tough and overly cooked steak.
LITTLE FAT MALE CUSTOMER to ANNIE: (As he is looking at Annie with a look of madness on his face as he is saying to her in a wicked tone of voice): "Girlie, girlie!"
ANNIE to the LITTLE FAT MALE CUSTOMER: (As Annie is now apporaching him with a smile on her face and says to him in a mischievous but yet professional tone of voice): "Did you call me, sir?"
LITTLE FAT MALE CUSTOMER to ANNIE: (As he is looking at her with a mad but yet slightly mischievous look on his face and says to her in a mischievous tone of voice): "No, I called you, girlie!"
ANNIE to the LITTLE FAT MALE CUSTOMER: (As she is standing there holding her hands with a big smile on her face and says to him in really mischievous voice as she is cocking her head and pointing a finger at him): "Haaa, haaa, haaa, haaa, you noticed, haaa, haaa, haaa, haaa!"
LITTLE FAT MALE CUSTOMER to ANNIE: (As he now has a look of madness on his face and is shouting at her in a state of outrage as he is using hand gestures for madness): "This steak is impossible to cut, it's hard as a rock!"
ANNIE to the LITTLE FAT MALE CUSTOMER: (As she i slooking at him with a look of dismay on her face and is pointing at his steak and says in a mischievous tone of voice): "Oh sir, that's very fine meat. You see, it has a government stamp on it see, wounded at the Battle of Gettysburg!"
LITTLE FAT MALE CUSTOMER to ANNIE: (As he is sitting there looking at Annie with a disgusted look on his face as he is pointing at his horrible steak and is shouting at her in an un-happy and mad voice): "I tell you, this steak is terrible!"
ANNIE to the LITTLE FAT MALE CUSTOMER: (As Annie is now using a quiet and serious tone of voice as she has a hurt look on her face as she is now saluting in a state of pride says): "Oh, please sir, you're talking about a Civil War Veteran!"
We now see Charlie approaching Annie and the Little Fat Male Customer as Charlie has a look of worry on his face as he is saluting back to Annie.
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he is standing there looking at her with a look of wonderment on his face and is using a worried and questionable voice now asks her): "What seems to be the trouble, General?"
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As Annie is standing there with a really perplexed look on her face and is using a painful tone of voice says to Charlie): "Well, the gentleman says he cannot cut his steak!"
We now see Annie standing there looking at Charlie with a look of hurt and dismay on her face as Charlie is looking at the Little Fat Male Customer with a look of wonderment on his face as the Little Fat Male Customer is looking at Annie and Charlie with a look of madness and disgust.
CHARLIE to the LITTLE FAT MALE CUSTOMER: (As Charlie is saying to him with a mischievous tone of voice): "Well, oh, try sticking your fork in the gravy."
We now see Anne taking her arm and is hitting Charlie lightly with it as she is also giving him a look of disgust.
CHARLIE to the LITTLE FAT MALE CUSTOMER: (As Charlie is using hand gestures to support himself as he now has a look of wonderment on his face as he is saying to him in a carrying and slightly stammering voice): "Oh, unhn, unhn, I'll get you the carvin' knife."
As Charlie is now walking away to get the carving knife with a puzzled look on his face as we see Annie standing there nodding her head in agreement with a look of madness on her face as we see the Little Fat Male Customer sitting there still with his napkin tucked under his chin and with on hand on the table as he is now looking at both Charlie and Annie with a look of puzzlement on his face.
LITTLE FAT MALE CUSTOMER to CHARLIE: (As Charlie is now exiting to get the carving knife as the Little Fat Male Customer is looking at Charlie in a state of disgust and is shouting at Charlie in a mad and disgusted voice): "Yeah, you better get me something!"
Charlie is now going back behind the snack bar counter looking at the shelves for the carving knife with a look of seriousness on his face as Comrade Olga is sitting there drinking her coffee and watching Charlie {Yasha} with a look of devilment on her face.
Charlie has now found the carving knife and is setting the different pieces up on the snack bar counter in a very serious mood as he is now putting it together. Charlie has now plugged the carving knife into an electrical outlet and has draped the chord over the snack bar counter as he is now taking it to the Little Fat Male Customer.
CHARLIE to the LITTLE FAT MALE CUSTOMER: (As Charlie is now handing him the carving knife with a look of care on his face as he is saying in a professional voice): "Here you are, sir!"
We now see the Little Fat Male Customer standing up and putting his steak at the head of the table as he is now taking the carving knife from Charlie as he is not only cutting his rock hard steak, he is also now sawing the table into two sections.
As the Little Fat Male Customer was sawing the table into two portions we saw Comrade Olga looking at them with a devilsh look on her face as she now has pushed onto the button in her hand causing the giant flower camera on the top of her hat to flip upwards as she is now taking a couple of more photoshots of Charlie {Yashs} and the going ons at the table. We also see Annie and Charlie standing there with their eyes bugging out of their heads as Annie has her mouth agait and both of them have looks of surprised scaredness on their faces.
The Little Fat Male Customer has now successfully sawed his rock hard steak and the table into two portions as Annie and Charlie are standing there totally dumbfounded. We now see Comrade Olga sitting at the snack bar counter with her head lowered with a evil look on her face as she is now taking several more photoshots inconspicuously of Charlie, {Yasha}, with the flower camera. Comrade Olga has now noticed Mr. Travis as she is now quickly closing up her flower camera and is acting cool and coy with a look of dazement on her face.
MR. TRAVIS to ACME FOODS: (As he has now dialed their number on the telephone and is ordering from them the supplies that they are out of): "Unhn, yes, Acme Foods? Aaaah, this is Mr. Travis of the Daredevil Diner, I'd like to place an ordure. Twenty pounds of sugar, Five Polish hams, Twelve dozen eggs."
As Mr. Travis was placing his supplies ordure with Acme Foods we saw in the background Comrade Olga smoking a cigarette looking coy as Magda is now refreshing a couple of customers coffee cups.
We are now seeing a table with a Male Customer Lover, {NAME: LARUE FARLOW} and a Female Customer Lover as they are looking at one another with loving looks on their faces as they are making goo-goo eyes at one another.
MALE LOVER CUSTOMER to FEMALE LOVER CUSTOMER: (As he is sweetly caressing her chin and is smiling adorningly at her as she is looking back at him adorningly as he says to her): "Honey baby, are you comfortable?"
FEMALE LOVER CUSTOMER to MALE LOVER CUSTOMER: (As they are still sitting there flirting with one another as she says to him in a loving voice): "Just fine, sweetheart lover!"
We are now seeing a giant serving stew pot with a ladel in it as Charlie is now making large meatballs and is tossing them into the pot like he is playing basketball with a happy and mischievous look on his face.
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is now approaching Charlie and is gently tapping him on his arm and is looking at him with a sweet smile on her face as she is saying to him in a happy, mischievous voice): "I hate to break up the ball game, slugger!"
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As Charlie is standing there with a perplexed look on his face as he is saying to her in a mischievous voice as he is still meat ball basketball): "What, is it coach?"
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is now flipping through her ordure pad with a look of wonder on her face as she is saying in a serious tone of voice): "I got a few ordures for ya!"
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he is still happily engulfed in his meat ball basketball and is smiling mischievously as he is saying in a mischievous but yet slightly sarcastic tone of voice): "Well ding, ding ring out the news!"
Annie is standing there with a really serious look on her face as Charlie is standing there in a totally happy state as he is smiling wonderly as he is totally enjoying his meat ball basketball.
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is using a serious tone of voice as she is reading off to Charlie at a rapid paced voice about the ordures as Charlie is now making on final meat ball basket as Annie states): "Are you ready?, Two Ordures Of Hash, One Irish Stew, and One Ham On Rye."
We are now back on the Male Lover and the Female Lover as she is looking at him in a full blown state of love as he is also looking at her in full blown love as he is gently caressing her face.
MALE LOVER CUSTOMER to FEMALE LOVER CUSTOMER: (As he is saying to her in a loving and flirtatious voice): "Ah, gee, baby you look adorable today, your eyes remind of......"
We are now back in the kitchen were we see Charlie with a dazed look on his face as he is cocking his head at Annie as he is now picking up her ordures. Annie is standing there holding her ordure pad and is showing it to Charlie with a look of dismay on her face.
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (In a serious tone of voice): "Two meatballs with gravy."
CHARILE to ANNIE: (As he is looking at her with a dazed look on his face and says seriously): "Got it, what else?"
MALE LOVER CUSTOMER to FEMALE LOVER CUSTOMER: (As they are both sitting there in full blown state of love for one another): "Why I've never see your hair lovlier honey it's so shiney, what do you use on it?"
MR. TRAVIS to ACME FOODS: (As he is standing there reading off his ordure list in a serious voice): "Twelve pounds of chicken fat!"
MALE LOVER CUSTOMER to FEMALE LOVER CUSTOMER: (As they are still sitting there googling all over one another as he is now caressing her hands says): "Oh, you have such beautiful hands and your long tapering fingers are like."
MR. TRAVIS to ACME FOODS: (As he still on the telephone and is completing more of his ordure): "A big bunch of bananas, oh, by the way I need some fish, you're out of herring how about salmon? How's your baracuda?"
FEMALE LOVER CUSTOMER to MALE LOVER CUSTOMER: (As she is sitting there with a really loving look on her face as he is gazing back at her in a total state of love as she is saying): "She's hom with father. Daddie has not been feeling well you know, he's, he's, suffering from a sever case of."
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is giving another ordure with a look of seriousness on her face as she is using a serious voice): "Succatash."
CHARILE to ANNIE: (As he is looking at her with a look of puzzlement on his face as he is looking at the ordure pad as she is looking back at him in madness as he is now saying): "Oh, succatash, I just happen to have it right here."
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As Charlie is presenting to her a pre-made dish of succatash as she is looking at it with a worried and sick like look as she is saying a worried tone of voice): "Hunha, it doesn't look so good!"
MALE LOVER CUSTOMER to FEMALE LOVER CUSTOMER: (As he is sitting there gazzing adorningly at her as he now has one arm on the table and ther other arm drapped on the back of his chair as he is giving her full blown goo-goo eyes as he is saying to her in a loving tone of voice): "Baby, if I had you alone right now I'd."
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As Charlie is now holding his dish of succatash and is showing it to Annie with a dazed look on his face says in a mischievous tone of voice as Annie is standing there with a dazed look on her face as Charlie says mischievously): "Put horseradish on it."
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is now cocking her head and is looking at Charlie with a puzzled look on her face as she is using a sarcastic tone of voice as she is now exiting the kitchen): "Okay, Charlie hurry up with the ordures will you, my customers can't wait to get a belly ache!"
We now see Charlie with a look of dismay on his face as he now takes a sniff of the succatash thinking it smells all right to him.
We now see a clock that reads twelve noon. Mr. Travis is now comparing the time on the clock with his pocket watch. Mr. Travis is now blowing on a whistle as he is holding onto a bull horn.
MR. TRAVIS to ANNIE, MAGDA, and CHARLIE: (As he is now shouting at them through the bull horn in a worried tone of voice and has a worried look on his face): "Now here this, now here this, stand by for the noon hour rush, man your battle stations." Ten-Nine-Eight-Seven-Six-Five-Four-Three-Two- One."
We now see Mr. Travis in a horrible state of panic as he is now grabbing hold of the cash register as Annie and Magda are standing there with looks of worry on their faces as Comrade Olga is sitting at the snack bar counter with a look of dazement on her face as Charlie is standing there with his mouth agait, his eyes bugging out of his face and a really scared look on his face.
TO ME THE NEXT SMALL SCENE IS LIKE A 'SILENT MOVIE':
We are now on a factory that is across the street from them as we hear the break whistle blowing and the employees are rushing out like a bunch of race horses to the diner as we hear playing "CAMPTOWN RACES."
The three hundred employees are now rushing in like a heard of elephants taking their seats as we are hearing playing, "IT'S A HOT TIME IN THE OLD TOWN TONIGHT!" As Mr. Travis is now in a frantic pace tossing menus to the customers as Charlie is now frantically cooking the different ordures as we now see Magda and Annie grabbing them a delivering at a frantic pace as Mr. Travis is standing up front with a dazed look on his face and his arms crossed as he is now watching poor Charlie. Magda, and Annie all working frantically like 'chickens with their heads cut off'. Mr. Travis has now pointed a finger at Magda to hurry her up as she is now carrying six cups of coffee at one and is frantically delivering them. Charlie and Annie are also working at a double-timed frantic pace.
We are now seeing a table of three male employees all with looks of wonderment as one of them is trying to pour himself a glass of water and every time he pours the water it now seems to disappear. {Water Customer: NAME: JOE PLOSKI}.
It is now a production line set-up where we see Charlie with a look of dismay on his face as he is frantically now dishing out the 'Road-Kill' as Annie and Magda are grabbing it at a triple timed state of franticness and is throwing it at the customers.
As Charlie is now frantically dishing out the ordures of 'Road-Kill' we now see Comrade Olga still sitting at the snack bar counter as she has a look of evilness on her face as she is flipping her flower camera and is rappidly snapping photoshots of Charlie, {Yasha}.
We are now back on the table of the three male employess where that one male employee is bound and determined to fill his trick glass with water, it it kills him. He has now admitted defeat as he now slams down the water pitcher onto the tale as well as his fists as we now hear the slamming of piano keys.
Charlie is now frantically dishing out his last three plates of 'Road-Kill' as he is now waving his arms in a gesture of that is enough as we see customers sitting there eating their 'Road-Kill' delicacies, as some are getting up to exit as Magda and Annie are still running frantically delevering plates of 'Road-Kill'. The Male Water Customer is sitting there with a totally disgusted look on his face as with his two table partners.
It is now the end of the noon time rush as we are seeing all of the factory employees getting up at a hurried pace and are rushing over to the cash register to cash out as we now see Mr. Travis working at triple pace speed to get them cashed out and back to work on time.
All the while that Mr. Travis was standing there with a look of happiness on his face as he is franctically pushing different sales keys as we are once again hearing playing in the background, "IT'S A HOT TIME IN THE OLD TOWN TONIGHT!"
The lunch rush is now over as we see the employees going back to work running backwards, at a fast pace as the break whistle is now blowing backwards as we are now seeing the smoke from the whistle going back into it backwards.
END OF THE 'SILENT MOVIE PICTURE:'
We are now back inside of the Daredevil Diner where we see Charlie humming happily as he is filling a buss boy dishes carrying cart with dirty dishes as Annie is refilling the soda pop bar.
START OF MOE HOWARD'S SEGMENT:
◊ We now see Mr. Raines walking into the diner at a rapid pace with a look of seriousness on his face as he is now approaching Charlie.
◊ MR. RAINES to CHARLIE: (As he is shouting at Charlie in a mad tone of voice): "Hello, sir!"
◊ CHARLIE to MR. RAINES: (As Charlie is now wiping off his hands and is looking at Mr. Raines with a look of dismay on his face as he is saying to him in a low tone of voice): "Oh, yes!?"
◊ MR. RAINES to CHARLIE: (As he is walking up to Charlie with a serious look on his face and is asking him in a serious tone of voice): "I'm looking for Miss, aaaah, Anders, Miss Magda Anders. My name is Crumbworth Raines, I'm a lawyer."
◊ We now see Charlie looking at Mr. Raines with a state of petrified fear on his face as he is using a panicking tone of voice as he is looking at Mr. Raines business card. Annie is also now approaching Mr. Raines at a face pace with a petrified look of fear on her face.
◊ CHARLIE to MR. RAINES: (As he is looking at Mr. Raines totally freaked out as he has a really hurtful look on his face as he is saying in a panicking and slightly stammering tone of voice): "She didn't do it. I tell you, she's innocent!"
◊ ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As Annie is now approaching Charlie in a really hurtful and carrying state as she is asking him a really low and hurtful tone of voice): "What's the matter, Charlie?"
◊ CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As Charlie has a really scared and hurtful look on his face as he is pointing at Mr. Raines business card is saying to Annie in a stammering and panicking tone of voice): "This guy is a, is a, Crumbworth Raines, he's, he's a lawyer, he's, he's, looking, looking for Magda."
◊ ANNIE to MR. RAINES: (As Annie is now in a full blown state of panic and fear as she is using hand gestures to support panic as she is saying to him a petrified state of panic and fear): "Oh, she couldn't of possibly done it, she's been with us all day!"
◊ MR. RAINES to CHARLIE and ANNIE: (As he is standing there with a look of hurt on his face as he is using a carrying tone of voice as he is trying to expalin to them why he wants to see Magda): "Oooohm ooooh, ooooh, ooooh, now you don't understand, it's her Uncle George, he's dead!"
◊ We now see Annie and Charlie standing there with looks of panic on their faces as Annie is standing there in total fear as she is starring at him in panic and with her mouth agait as Charlie is standing there horrified with his eyes bugging out of his head.
◊ ANNIE to MR. RAINES: (As she has a really sad and petrified look on her face as she is saying to Mr. Raines in a really painful and stammering voice): "I, I, know she didn't do it, she's innocent!"
◊ MR. RAINES to CHARLIE and ANNIE: (As Mr. Raines has a serious look on his face as he is using a professional and serious voice as he is now being able to tell them why he is there): "Please, let me explain, he died in a little college town about six hundred miles from here!"
◊ CHARLIE to MR. RAINES: (As Charlie is looking at him with a look of wonderment on his face as he is saying in a sarcastic tone of voice): "That prove's we're right, where would she ever get a gun that shoots that far?"
◊ We now see Magda approaching Mr. Raines, Charlie, and Annie as Charlie and Annie are looking at one another with looks of worry on their faces as Mr. Raines is looking at Charlie and Annie with a dazed look on his face as Magda is now meeting them with a perplexed look on her face.
◊ MAGDA to MR. RAINES: (As she is looking at him with a look of dismay on her face as she is asking Mr. Raines in a worried and questionable tone of voice): "Oh, what's the trouble?"
◊ CHARLIE to MAGDA: (As Charlie has a really hurt look on his face as he is using a carrying tone of voice as he is trying to defend her): "S-S-S-H-H-H, don't say anything, Magda, he's a lawyer, we'll protect you!"
◊ MAGDA to MR. RAINES: (As she is looking at Mr. Raines with a worried look on her face as she says in a worried tone of voice): "I don't understand!?"
◊ MR. RAINES to MAGDA: (As he is using a worried tone of voice and is looking at her with a dazed look on his face says): "Neither do I, but if I can get a word in here, you see Miss Anders, your Uncle George died and I'm here about an inheritance."
◊ As Mr. Raines was talking to Magda about her inheritance we now saw Charlie and Annie standing there with surprised look on their faces.
◊ CHARLIE to MR. RAINES: (As Charlie is now reaching out and taking Mr. Raines by his arm with a look of glee on his face as he is now saying in a joyful voice): "An inheritance, doy, that's different, come on sit down Mr. Lawyer, over here!"
◊ MR. RAINES to CHARLIE: (As Mr. Raines is now pulling back in a state of madness as he is shouting in a mad voice): "No, no!"
◊ ANNIE to MR. RAINES: (As she is now grabbing his arm in glee as she is pulling on him and is trying to get him to sit down says to him in a panicking tone of voice): "Yeah, let me take your coat and hat!"
◊ MR. RAINES to CHARLIE and ANNIE: (As he is pushing away from them in madness as he is saying in a mad tone of voice): "Not even that!"
◊ MAGDA to MR. RAINES: (As she is looking at Mr. Raines with a carrying look on her face as she is saying in an apologetic tone of voice): "I'm terribly sorry to here about my Uncle George's death, but frankly I hardly ever knew him. I only saw him once or twice as a little girl."
◊ CHARLIE to MAGDA: (As Charlie has a look of mischief on his face and is saying to her in a mischievous voice): "Oh, was your Uncle a little girl?"
◊ We now see Magda, Annie, and Mr. Raines looking at Charlie with looks of worried madness on their faces.
◊ ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As Annie is hitting Charlie with her elbow and has a look of devilment on her face as she is saying to him in a mad tone of voice): "Come on."
◊ MR. RAINES to CHARLIE and ANNIE: (As he is looking at the two of them with a look of madness as he is shouting at them in a mad tone of voice): "If you don't mind, I'd like to speak to Miss Anders alone!"
◊ ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is looking at Charlie with a gazzed look on her face as she is saying to him a low and mad tone of voice): "I think he wants us to leave!"
◊ CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he has a mad look on his face and is mumbling at her in madness says): "Aaaah, boy, there's a brush if I ever heard one."
◊ We now see Annie and Charlie leaving as Magda is now standing in front of Mr. Raines with a sweet smile on her face.
◊ MR. RAINES to MAGDA: (As he is no looking at her with a serious look on his face as he is saying to her in a professional tone of voice): "Miss Anders, evidently your Uncle George was quiet fond of you, several years ago he drew up a Will, leaving you everything. Now there's not a great deal of money involved here, but he did leave you a very successful book store at Updyke University."
◊ MAGDA to MR. RAINES: (As she has a dazed look on her face and is saying to him in a questionable tone of voice): "Really?"
◊ MR. RAINES to MAGDA: (As he is standing there with a look of happiness on his face as he is saying to her in a really carrying tone of voice): "Yeah, it was doing such good business, that I suggest you re-open it as soon as possible."
◊ MAGDA to MR. RAINES: (As she is standing there looking at him with a look of wonderment on her face as she is saying to him in a perplexed tone of voice): "But, I don't know anything about running a book store."
◊ MR. RAINES to MAGDA: (As he is looking at her with a carrying look on his face and is using a re-assuring tone of voice says to her): "Oh, I don't think it will be difficult for an intelligent girl like yourself, you could find a couple of assistances to help."
◊ MAGDA to MR. RAINES: (As she has a look of glee on her face and is saying to him in an excited tone of voice): "Oh, I'm sure willing to give it a try."
◊ MR. RAINES to MAGDA: (As he is pointing a finger at her and has a serious look on his face as he is saying to her in a really serious and slightly pushie tone of voice): "Well, the sooner the better, if you'd like to go now, I'm driving back to Updyke University. I could give you a lift, it you don't mind riding in a Compact?" {We now see here Mr. Raines smiling sweetly a Magda}.
◊ MAGDA to MR. RAINES: (As she is looking at him with a look of question on her face as she is asking him a favour in a questionable tone of voice): "Could we stop by my place, so I can get my things?"
◊ MR. RAINES to MAGDA: (As he is looking at her with a sweet smile and says to her in a really carrying and agreeable tone of voice): "Why, of course!"
◊ MAGDA to MR. RAINES: (As she is looking at him with a look of seriousness on her face as she is using a sad tone of voice): "Why, I better tell everybody I'm leaving!"
◊ We now see Annie taking away an empty coffee cup from the snack bar counter as Charlie is now putting some more finishing touches on the cake for Mr. Travis' birthday, as Mr. Travis is sitting on a stool in front of the cash register and is completing some paperwork.
◊ We now here Magda in a happy but slightly sad tone of voice shouting out to everyone to tell them about her new position at Updyke University.
◊ MAGDA: (As she is calling them and they are now getting up and running over to her in a state of panic as she is saying in a happy but yet sad tone of voice): "Oh, Mr. Travis, Annie, Charlie?"
◊ Mr. Travis has now approached Magda and Mr. Raines. Charlie and Annie are now approaching her as Charlie has his cake in his hand.
◊ ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is looking at him with a mad look on her face as she is saying to him in a mad tone of voice): "Would you put the cake down, please?"
◊ CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he has a look of dismay on his face as he is saying to her in a mumbling and mad tone of voice): "Oh, all right, all right."
◊ Charlie has now set the cake on the stool that Mr. Travis was sitting on as he and Annie are now approaching Magda, Mr. Raines, and Mr. Travis.
◊ MAGDA to MR. TRAVIS: (As she is using a polite tone of voice and has a polite look on her face says): "Mr. Travis, this is Mr. Raines, he's an attorney and he's, he's just informed me that my Uncle passed away and that he left me a book store at Updyke University, and I'm sorry, but I have to leave immediately!"
◊ MR. TRAVIS to MAGDA: (As he has a look of sadness on his face and is using a sad tone of voice as he is saying to her): "Oh, well, aaaah, we'll miss you Magda, but good luck!"
◊ MAGDA to MR. TRAVIS: (As she is looking at him with a worried look on her face and is saying to him in an apolgetic tone of voice): "Thank-you, oh, I hope I'm not leaving you short handed?"
◊ CHARLIE to MAGDA: (As Charlie has a sad look on his face as he is using a sad but yet proud tone of voice says to her): "Don't worry, me and Annie will take care of everything."
◊ ANNIE to MAGDA: (As Annie has a really sad look on her face and is saying in a slightly crying tone of voice); "Sure!"
◊ MAGDA to ANNIE and CHARLIE: (As she is looking at them with a really sad look on her face as she is using a really sad tone of voice): "Annie, Charlie, you've been such good friends, I sure wish you were going with me?"
◊ ANNIE to MAGDA: (As Annie is now giving Magda a carrying good by hug as she is saying to Magda in a really sad voice): "Oh, we'll miss you too, sweetheart."
◊ CHARLE to MAGDA: (As Charlie is now giving Magda a hug good-bye and is saying to her in a low and carrying tone of voice): "Yeah, we sure will."
◊ We now see Mr. Raines looking at Mr. Travis with a sad look on his face as Mr. Travis is looking at him in a sad look as Mr. Travis was writing down some notes in a calendar note pad.
◊ We now see Charlie coming up from giving Magda her hug as he has one of her earrings on his nose. Annie now has a look of sadness on her face as Charlie is smiling at her proudly but yet slightly crying as we see Magda looking at both of them in a sad look as she is crying.
◊ CHARLIE to MAGDA: (As he is now giving her back her earring and is saying to her in a happy but yet slightly crying tone of voice): "I'm sorry!"
◊ Magda has now left with Mr. Raines from her old position as a waitress at the Daredevil Diner to her new position as a book store proprietor at Updyke University."
THIS END'S MOE'S ENTIRE ROLE HERE: {The paragraphs with the ◊ symbol by them are the ones that involved Moe, he was in this flick for a total of three minutes, four at the most}.
As Magda has now left with Mr. Raines and her new endeavours as a college book store proprietor we now see Mr. Travis standing there looking at Annie and Charlie with a really sad look on his face as Annies and Charlie are standing there crying as Magda has now exited.
MR. TRAVIS to CHARLIE and ANNIE: (As he is standing there with a really sad and hurtful look on his face as Charlie and Annie are now crying): "All right, get back to work!"
CHARLIE to MR. TRAVIS: (As both he and Annie are standing there crying as Charlie is saying to Mr. Travis in a crying tone of voice): "Yes, sir!"
We now see Annie and Charlie standing there with horrified looks of fear and panic on their faces as Mr. Travis is now holding onto his note pad and is in the process of sitting on the stool where the cake is, {as he knows nothing about the cake}.
ANNIE and CHARLIE to MR. TRAVIS: (As they are shouting at him in unison in a horrified state of fear and panic to try and worn him about the cake): "Mr. Travis, I would not......!"
MR. TRAVIS to ANNIE and CHARLIE: (As Mr. Travis has a mad look on his face and is shouting at them in a mad tone of voice as he is waving a hand at them): "Nuts, get back to work!"
We now see Mr. Travis as he is writing an entry into his note book now sitting on the cake as he has notice he now has a look of painful dismay on his face as he is now getting ready to blow his stack at Charlie and Annie.
We now see Mr. Travis in a horrified state of madness as he is now waving a finger in the come here sign signallling Charlie and Annie to him. Charlie and Annie are now approaching Mr. Travis in a really slow walk as they both have really hurt and panicking looks on their faces.
CHARLIE and ANNIE to MR. TRAVIS: (As Charlie is looking at Mr. Travis in fear with his eyes bugging out of his head as Annie is looking at Mr. Travis with a sad and totally petrified out of her gourd look as they are saying in unison in a really scared voice): "Happy Birthday!?"
MR. TRAVIS to ANNIE and CHARLIE: (As he is looking at them with a look of bewilderment on his face as he is shouting at them in a low and quiet tone of voice that in the end turns into a state of demented shoutings as he is trying to support a professional voice): "Annie, Charlie, you've been working with me for a good many years. I've tried to be a good employer. I even understood your foolishness, I'm sure it was well meant. If you don't get out of here this very minute, I'm gonna kill both of you!"
Charlie is standing there totally petrified as he has a look of sheer panic on his face as his eyes are bugging out of his head as we see Annie grabbing Charlie's arm in a devastated acto of fear as she has a horrified look of panic on her face as she has Charlie by the arm and the two of them are now running out of the diner like a 'couple of bats out of hell'.
As Charlie and Annie were running out of the diner we saw Mr. Travis lowering his head in sadness and dismay as he has removed his spectacles and has rubbed his forehead.
Magda is now going to get her wishes alot sooner that she expected. Charlie and Annie are now standing along a road side at "THEIR FIRST AND FEEBLE ATTEMPT AT HITCHING A RIDE". We saw a 1965 Ford Fairlane go whizzing past them as it keeps going. Annie and Charlie are now brushing dust off of themselves.
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he is standing there in a cloud of dust as with Annie and he has a look of dismay on his face as he is saying to Annie in a low and carrying tone of voice): "Shuh, boy I'm glad we got fired. You know that Mr. Travis was a trouble maker!"
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is looking at Charlie with a really disgusted look on her face as she says to him in a disgusted voice): "Unha, yeah, sure!"
HITCHING A RIDE TAKE TWO: We now see a 1965 Chevrolet Malibu go whizzing by as they failed a ride as they are standing there with disgusted looks on their faces.
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As the two of them are now waving dust clouds away as they both have looks of worry on their faces as she is saying to Charlie in a low and worried tone of voice): "Boy, Magda will be surprised to see us so soon, hunh?"
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As Charlie is standing there choking on some dust along with Annie as Charlie has a look of wonderment on his face as he is saying to Annie in a voice of re-assurance): "Why, didn't the lawyer say she needed someone to help her?"
HITCHING A RIDE TAKE THREE: Is once again turning out to be a failure as we now see a 1966 Oldsmobile Toronado go whizzing past them and not stopping. Again is dust cloud city as they are again waving dust from their faces.
HITCHIG A RIDE TAKE FOUR: Here we go again, thumbing a ride part four has now also bombed out as we see another 1966 Ford Fairlane go whizzing by and leaving them in clouds of dust.
We are now in a farm field where we see Comrade Olga sneaking up on Charlie, {Yasha}, as she is standing in the distance from him as she is now holding a Kodak camera and has taken a couple of photoshots of him and Annie.
HITCHING A RIDE PART FIVE: "They are bound and determined to thumb a ride but once again it is a disastorous manner as another 1964 Chevrolet Malibu Classic goes whizzing by and leaving poor Charlie and Annie standing there waving clouds of dust from their faces.
Charlie and Annie are now slowly walking down the road side carrying their luggage cases as they both have looks of disgust on their faces.
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is looking at Charlie with a look of hurt on her face as she says to Charlie in a questionable voice): "Gee, I'm hungry, you got any money?"
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As Charlie has a look of hurt on his face as he is answering her question in a pantamine fashion): "No!" {As he is showing Annie his empty trousers pockets}.
Annie has now given Charlie a look of disgust when she has noticed that Charlie is also penniless. Charlie has now wadded up two giant handkerchiefs and has tossed them along side of the road.
We now see the very devious Comrade Olga still standing in the farm field as she is wickedly snapping photoshots of the entire events of Annie and Charlie, {Yasha}.
HITCHING A RIDE PART SIX: Once again the poor Annie and Charlie have unsuccessfully rode their thumbs for a ride as a 1964 Pontiac Camaro has whizzed by and it is once again dust cloud city.
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is handing Charlie her luggage case and her pocketbook as she has a look of mischief on her face as she is saying to Charlie in a devious voice at their SEVENTH RIDE HITCHING has once again gone capotes as she is raising the hem of her dress and is exposing her bloomers): "Here, I know how to stop a car. I'll show you how they do it in the movies, here!"
Annie is now standing there with her dress raised as she has a smile of evilness on her face.
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he is looking at her with a look of disgust and is saying to her in a really disgusted voice as he has now noticed her bloomers): "Boy, you haven't been out to a movie in a long time!"
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she has now tossed her dress hem down in disgust as she has her hands on her waist in madness as she is saying to Charlie thoroughly disgusted out): "They may not look good, but they're warm!"
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As Charlie is getting in the act on stopping a car for their EIGHTH AND UNSUCCESSFUL THUMB RIDE IS A FAILURE. Charlie has now set their luggage cases on the road and has a look of bewilderment on his face as he is saying to her in a devilsh voice): "Let me show you how to stop a car!"
Charlie has now buttoned his suit jacket and has looked both ways down the road for an automobile as he is laying flat on his back in the middle of the road. We got a quick glimpse of Comrade Olga still holding her camera as she is looking at Charlie, {Yasha} in a state of dismay.
HITCHING A RIDE PART EIGHT: Yes, you guest it, has bombed out as we see a 1964 B.M.W. come whizzing down the road as it is now running over Charlie as it goes whizzing on it's way. As Charlie has now been cremated by the B.M.W. we nos see both Annie and Comrade Olga standing there in their perspective locations with their eyes bugging out of their heads as their mouths are now agait as they are looking at Charlie in states of wondering if he is all right.
Charlie is now sitting up, shaking and with a really scared and painful look on his face as he is now covered with tire tread marks. He has now looked at Annie with a look of oh well, at least I tried. The devious Comrade Olga was busy snapping photoshots of these events.
They have now finally gotten a ride into town where we are on a street merging where on the right side of the street a business that reads: "DUNCAN'S HOT DOGS" 15¢". And on the left side of the street "UPDYKE SAVINGS AND LOAN." Their ride is on a rickety old and rusted out 1920's truck driven by "GRANNY DAISY MOSES" {NAME: IRENE RYAN}.
As GRANNY DAISY MOSES was pulling up in front of their destination we heard playing in the background, {the Theme Song To Beverly Hillbillies}. Yes you guest it, Comarade Olga was there photoshoooting the events.
GRANNY DAISY MOSES was sitting behind the driving wheel smiling happily at them as Charlie is now helping Annie off of the truck in a total state of glee
ANNIE to GRANNY: (As Annie is now smiling happily to Granny and says to Granny in a really carrying voice): "Well, thanks for the lift, Granny!"
GRANNY to ANNIE: (As she is waving a hand at them and has a huge sweet smile on her face as she is saying back in a happy voice): "Any time, kid!"
CHARLIE to GRANNY: (As he is looking at her with a sweet and thankful smile on his face says happily): "Yeah, thank's very much!"
Charlie has now removed his hat as he is waving it at Granny in a state of good-bye as both Annie and Charlie are standing there with huge and grateful smiles on their faces as Granny has now honked her horn once as a way to say your welcome as she now has a mischievous smirk on her face as she is driving away.
Annie and Charlie have now finally now reached their destination as they are standing in front of a store with a business window that reads in "Old English Style Lettering'.
YE OLDE
BOOK SHOPPE
{The book store is now infested with German Spies as they think that Charlie is "Yasha Nudnick' and are spying to hopefully capture him and the missing documents, they won't because they are totally wrong}.
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is looking at him with a gleeful smile and says to him in a gleeful voice): "Well, I guess this is it!"
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he is looking at the business establishment and is saying in a mischievous voice): "Ye Oldie Book Shoppie. Some book store, they don't even know how to spell!"
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is pointing a thumb at the store and is saying to Charlie in a state of dazement as she is explaining to Charlie about the spelling of the words): "That's Old English!"
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he is looking at her with a puzzled look on his face as he is saying to her in a worried voice): "I knew it was old somethin!"
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is pointing at the store with a look of bewilderment on her face as she is saying in a low, monotone voice): "Come on!"
Annie and Charlie are now going into the book store. We now see Comrade Olga sitting in her covertable as she has an evil and devious look on her face as we hear the sounds of chimes and gongs sounding. She has her radio on and is listening to music as the radio announcer, 'Of Sorts', breaks in.
RADIO ANNOUNCER: (As we now hear the voice of one of the German spies saying in a really horrible German Accent): "We interupt the broadcast for a message for Comrade Olga, come in Comrade Olga!"
We now see Comrade Olga with a really sultery and evil look on her face as we hear playing in the background, {The Theme Song to "Get Smart}.
COMRADE OLGA to MR. BIG: (As she is talking to him on the telephone in a low and wicked tone of voice): "Comrade Olga here!"
MR. BIG to COMRADE OLGA: (As he is still using his thick and horrible German accent and is saying evily): "Come in Comrade Seed!" {NAME: TIM HERBERT}
We are now looking at a covered man hole which is the hiding place of Comrade Seed.
COMRADE SEED to MR. BIG: (As he is using a walkie-talkie and is saying in a low and evil voice): "Comrade Seed, here!"
COMRADE OLGA to COMRADE SEED: (As she is speaking to him on the telephone in a really worried and questionable voice as she has a look of wonderment on her face): "Comadre Seed, where are you?"
COMRADE SEED to COMRADE OLGA: (As he is lifting up the cover of the manhole and has a really scared look on his face as he is saying to her in a scared voice): "Back-up your car two feet and you'll find out!"
Comrade Olga has now hung up the telephone and has a worried look on her face as she is reversing her automobile two feet and is exposing the hiding spot of Comrade Seed. We now see Comrade Seed coming out of his hiding spot as he is now quietly putting back the manhole cove and is sneaking over to Comrade Olga's automobile.
Comrade Seed is now in Comrade Olga's automobile as he is looking at her with an evil look as she is looking at him with a look of devilment on her face.
COMRADE SEED to COMRADE OLGA: (As he is looking at her with a devilment look on his face as he is asking her in a wicked voice): "Are you 007684532, formerly, 007684531?"
COMRADE OLGA to COMRADE SEED: (As she is looking at him with a devilsh look and is answering him in a low wicked voice): "Right, Comrade!"
We now see Comrade Seed shaking hands with Comrade Olga as he now has a look on his face like a chipmunk, {his upper lip pulled and his two front teeth are showing only}.
COMRADE SEED to COMRADE OLGA: (As he looking at her with his chipmunk look as she is looking back at hime with a wicked and devious look as he asks her): Olga is it? They told me to contact you here, headquarters said you'd bring me up-to-date."
COMRADE OLGA to COMRADE SEED: (As they are still sitting in her convertable as she is filling him in on the details): "Well, I'm sure he's Nudnick, he's a pretty strange fellow though, he must be carrying a complete record of orbital flight on him."
COMRADE SEED to COMRADE OLGA: (As he is now looking at her with a serious look and is using a serious voice): "That Cosmic Information gathered on his 98 orbital flights around the earth is of the utmost importance of the Space Programme of our beloved country 'Klabiasha.' {He now does the hand salute of his country which is the symbol for hello}.
COMRADE OLGA to COMRADE SEED: (As she is sitting there with a perplexed look on her face and is using a perplexed voice as she is asking him): "I know, so why can't we grab him and get rid of him?"
COMRADE SEED to COMRADE OLGA: (As he is still sitting in her automobile and is looking at her wickedly as he is using a wicked voice): "Mr. Big, says no. If Yasha even suspects we're after him he'll destroy all the records and our government will destroy us!"
COMRADE OLGA to COMRADE SEED: (As she is now looking at him with a really dazed look on her face as she is saying in a worried voice): "Well, he's gone into the book store!"
COMRADE SEED to COMRADE OLGA: (As the two of them are now looking at the book store with evil looks on their faces as he says to her in an evil voice): "Good, many of our Agents use it as a contact pointe. So we can watch every move he makes."
We are now inside of the book store where we see Magda smiling happily at Annie and Charlie as they are now smiling in glee back at her.
MAGDA to ANNIE and CHARLIE: (As she has a look of happiness on her face and is using a happy voice says): "Oh, I'm sorry you were fired, but I'm glad you're here, I could sure use a little help!?
CHARLIE to MAGDA: (As he is standing there with a happy, mischievous look on his face as he is saying to her in a playful voice): "I'll be as little help as possible!"
ANNIE to MAGDA: (As Annie now has a look of devilment on her face and is using a mischievous voice): "He' not kiddin'."
MAGDA to ANNIE and CHARLIE: (As she is now looking down at her desk at a mess of accounting ledger sheets and is saying to them in a worried voice): "Just look at this mess of figures!"
ANNIE to MAGDA: (As she is looking at Charlie with a devilsh look and is using a mischeivous voice): "Humph, look at that mess of a figure!"
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As Charlie is tipping his hat at her and has a mad look on his face says in a wicked voice): "Thank-you!"
MAGDA to ANNIE and CHARLIE: (As she is looking at them with a really dismayed look and is using a worried voice): "I don't know one from the other. I sure wished I studied accounting."
We now see Annie and Charlie standing there smiling at Magda with hurtful but yet carrying smiles.
MAGDA to ANNIE and CHARLIE: (As she has a really carrying look on her face and is saying to them in an apologetic voice): "Oh well, no sense in bothering you two with my problems, why don't you look around the store and get acquainted."
CHARLIE to MAGDA: (As he is pointing a finger at Annie as he is saying to Magda with a sheepish look on his face and a mischievous voice): "We all ready know each other!"
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is looking at him with an icy glare and is using a carrying voice): "Come on, Charlie!"
ANNIE to MAGDA: (As Annie and Charlie are now smiling happily at Magda as they are waving at her in good-bye says): "We'll see you later!"
We now see Annie and Charlie leaving Magda at the front desk working on her accounting ledger sheets as Charlie and Annie are carrying their luggage cases and familiarizing themselves with the lay-out of the book store.
We now see Annie with a look of surprise on her face as she is now looking at a very unusual painting as Charlie is looking in the other direction reading the titles on some of the books. Annie has now tapped Charlie on his shoulder and have him look at the strange picture, {which to the best of my ability is this}:
"An ugly square shaped face with a long nose pointing upwards with one hand being raised. Seven very long and ugly uneven teeth. Two eyes, one is centred in the upper right portion of the face while the second eye is in the lower left portion of the face very close to the chin." {As is on the painting easel up-side-down}.
We now see both Annie and Charlie looking at the weird painting with looks of grimace on their faces as they are turning their heads in all directions as they are trying to figure out what in the world it is.
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As Annie now has her head fully cocked to her right as she is slightly resting it on her shoulder with a look of wonderment on her face as Charlie now has lowered his head so he could see Annie right in the face as he is now asking her in a mischievous voice): "You got a pain in the side?"
Annie has now stood up with a look of madness on her face as she has now stomped on Charlie's right foot in madness as Charlie is looking at her with a look of bewilderment on his face.
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is looking at Charlie with a really mad look as she is shouting at Charlie in a low mad voice): "Come on, what do you suppose it is?"
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As Charlie has a look of dumbness on his face as he is looking at the stupid picture as Annie is glarring at it as Charlie is saying to Annie in a sarcastic voice): "Oh, any idiot would know what that is."
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is now standing there looking at Charlie with a look of dismay on her face as Charlie is standing there with a look of dumbfoundedness as Annie is asking Charlie in a sarcastic voice): "All right idiot, what is it?"
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he is standing there with a dazed look on his face as Annie is standing there with a puzzled look on her face as Charlie says in a mischievous voice): "Sunset at a city dump!"
Annie is now giving Charlie a look of bewilderment as she is now sighing in disbelief at Charlie as he is now walking away with a look of mischief on his face.
We are now seeing more of the haunted old store where were are now seeing a few more pictures.
1: "An ugly lady with a crooked shaped head, long boney nose, long stringy greasy black hair. Very long and boney looking fingers and one giant eye right in the middle of her forehead as she is crying."
2: "An antique style candle holder all bent out of shape and really crooked, with a very short candle in it, the flame is wiggling like it is being blown by the wind. Next to the candle is a very bent and rusty cake baking pan."
We now see Annie and Charlie looking at a stuffed crow sitting on a table as Annie has a look of happiness on her face as Charlie now has a sheepish look on his face.
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she has now tapped Charlie on his shoulder and shows Charlie the figurine): "Hey, how about that?"
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As Charlie is looking at the stuffed crow with a mischievous look on his face as he responds mischiefly): "It's a canary that use to work in a coal mine!"
Annie has now laughed in glee about Charlie's joke. They are now again walking around the book store getting to know it as they are now walking passed several shelves of books and there is also a giant stuffed eagle in flight perched on top of a table light.
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As Annie has now noticed the eagle and has a really scared look on her face as she is looking around the haunted book store says to Charlie in a scared tone of voice): "Eeeekth, oh boy, this place really gives me the creeps. You know, I bet Magda's uncle was a weirdo."
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As Charlie has a scared look on his face and is saying to Annie in a scared voice): Yeah, nutty too!"
Annie and Charlie are now looking over more of the haunted store with really sacred and petrified looks on their faces.
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As Charlie has now noticed a door and out of curiosity has now opened the door as he is saying to Annie in a curious voice): "I wonder what's in here?"
Charlie is now finding out what is behind the door as he is now falling down an entire flight of stairs into the basement quarters. Annie is standing at the top of the stairwell holding onto her luggage case with her head cocked and has a look of hurt and dismay as she is now looking down at Charlie.
CHARLIE: (As he has now discovered the basement the quick way is shouting loudly and painfully): "Ooooh, ooooh, ooooh, ooooh, ooooh, ooooh!"
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is shouting at Charlie in a mad voice as she is looking down the stairwell at Charlie with a hurtful look says to him): "Come on Charlie, stop kiddin' around."
We now see Magda looking around the store for Charlie and Annie as she has now noticed Annie and is now walking up to her at a brisk pace. We now see Magda standing there with a look of dismay on her face as Annie has a look of hurt on her face. Charlie is now coming up the stairwell dirty, hurt, and shaken up badly.
MAGDA to CHARLIE: (As she is looking at Charlie with a look of wonderment as she is saying to Charlie in a hurtful voice): "Oh, there you are!"
CHARLIE to MAGDA: (As he is now staggering slightly from the impact of falling down the stairwell as he is using a shakey voice says to her): "I certainly hope so!"
MAGDA to CHARLIE: (As Magda is now standing there with a really hurtful look on her face as she is saying to Charlie in a sarcastic voice): "That goes to the cellar."
CHARLIE to MAGDA: (As he has a look of hurt and sarcasm on his face and is saying to her in a sarcastic voice): Yeah, thanks a lump!"
MAGDA to CHARLIE and ANNIE: (As we see Charlie and Annie following Magda with looks of happiness on their faces as they are now going to see where they will be living as Magda says to them in a voice of dismay): "Come on, let me show you where you can stay, right in here!"
Magda has now opened a door to a storage room about 40'x40' that is filled with old, beat out tables and desks with beat out chairs on them turned up-side-down. We now see Charlie and Annie looking around the room with looks of worry and dismay.
CHARLIE to MAGDA: (As Charlie is now looking at Magda with a look of wonderment as Magda has a look of happiness on her face as Annie is standing there with a look of madness on her face as Charlie says to Magda): "Well, it's not very pretty, but it's cheerful."
MAGDA to ANNIE: (As Magda is now looking at Annie with a really sweet and carrying voice as she is saying to Annie in a friendly voice): "Annie, you can stay with me in my apartment, and we'll fix this place up for Charlie!"
ANNIE to MAGDA and CHARLIE: (As Annie is giving Charlie a sweet smile as she has patted Magda on her arm and is using a re-assuring voice): "Yeah, we'll make it nice and cozy."
CHARLIE to ANNIE and MAGDA: (As Charlie is looking at the two of them with a sarcastic look on his face as he is saying to them in a sarcastic voice): "Yeah, sure, sure, enha, yeah, sure, it will be swell."
MAGDA to ANNIE and CHARLIE: (As she has a scared look on her face as she is saying in a scared voice): "Besides, I'd like to have somebody staying here at night. I don't know exactly what, but something funny's been going on here!"
Charlie now is looking at Magda with a petrified look of fear and panic.
ANNIE to MAGDA: (As Annie is now looking at Magda with a scared look as Annie is asking Magda in a voice of panic): "Funny, haaa, haaa, or funny peculiar?"
MAGDA to ANNIE: (As Magda is looking at Annie with a scared look and is using a scared voice): "Well, it's hard to explain, but there have been reports of mysterious noises and lights, but it's probably nothing!"
CHARLIE to MAGDA: (As Charlie is looking at her with a really petrified scared look as he saying to her in a scared and shakey voice): "Nothing, don't make mysterious noises and light up."
MAGDA to ANNIE: (As Magda is saying to Annie in a really friendly voice as she has a sweet smile on her face): "Come on Annie, let me show you our apartment."
Annie is now exiting with Magda as she is giving Charlie a quick glance of worry and care. Charlie is now waving his fingers good-bye to Annie in a state of fear and panic.
We now hear snake charming music playing as Charlie has now removed an over covering off of an object which happens to be an Egyptian Sphinx that is of a human head with lion feet, a human shaped body with a lion's tail and has an Egyptian style of hat on his head. Charlie now has a really scared look on his face as his eyes are now popping out of his head as he has now shaken the dust off of the over covering and has blown some dust off of the sphinx as the sphinx has now blown dust back at Charlie. Charlie has now looked back at the sphinx with his eyes bugging out of his head in a state of panic.
It is now the next morning where we see Annie standing behind the main service counter that has a telephone on it and a large roll of brown wrapping paper as she is standing there with a pencil in her hand as she is completing some calculations.
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is coming from behind the counter with a sweet and happy smile on her face as she is asking Charlie in a questionable voice): "Hi Charlie, how did you sleep last night?"
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As Charlie has a sleepy look on his face and is saying to Annie in a really tired voice as he is yawning non-stop): "Unhn, no good, I was up all night trying to get the window open."
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is looking at Charlie with a look of bewilderment as she is saying to Charlie in a sarcastic voice): "There's no window in that room!"
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As Charlie is standing there holding onto a newspaper with a look of perplexness on his face as Annie is standing there looking at Charlie like he is a stupid idiot): "No wonder, I couldn't get it open!"
We now see Annie rolling her eyes at Charlie in a state of dumbness as Charlie is standing there reading the morning newspaper. Charlie is now pointing a finger at a snipping in the morning newspaper as he has a happy and mischievous look on his face as Annie is standing there looking at the newspaper over Charlie's shoulder with a look of dismay on her face.
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (In a happy and mischievous voice): "Hey, wanna see something funny, look a this it says: "PERSONALS:" Dear Joe: Please come home and wire me, haaa, haaa, haaa, haaa, haaa, haaa, the guy must be an electrician."
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is looking at Charlie with a laughing smile on her face as she is saying to Charlie in a laughing tone of voice): "Why don't you cut out the jokes, all ready, yenh, and read some of the important news."
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he is still holding the newspaper and is looking at Annie with a look of wonderment on his face as he is using a mischievous tone of voice): "What news?"
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is using hand gestures to support dismay as she has a dumbfounded look on her face as she is using a sarcastic voice): "Oh, nothing just, aaaah, floods, earthquakes, riots, people starving all over the world, little things like that, you know!"
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As Charlie is still holding the newspaper and has a perplexed look on his face as Annie is standing there with her arms crossed and a mad look on her face as Charlie says to her mischievously): "Sure, what do you expect with McKinley President!"
We now see Annie lowering her head and shaking it in disgust with Charlie as she is also standing there with her arms crossed in a state of madness and disgust as Charlie is looking at the newspaper and is reading the different snippings with a look of bewilderment on his face.
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he has now found a snipping of interest as he is starting to read it to Annie in a serious tone of voice): "Hey, what is this about a missing cosmonaut?"
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is now taking the newspaper from Charlie as she is reading the snipping with a perplexed look on her face as she is using a serious voice): "Let's see: "Yasha Nudnick, famous Cosmonaut from' Socialist Republic Of Klabiasha', still missing!"
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he is standing there with his hands on his waist and has a look of bewilderment and concern on his face as Annie is standing there holding the newspaper with a look of dis-belief on her face as Charlie says in a questionable voice): "Klabiasha, gee, what a hokey name for a country."
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is standing there with a really perplexed look on her face as Charlie is standing there with a dazed look on his face as he is looking at the newspaper as Annie continues reading the snipping in a serious voice as she is pacing to and fro): "Listen: 'Yasha Nudnick the Cosmonaut, whos space capsule came down without him is still missing after four weeks. Washington Officials are still chuckling over the note that Yasha left in his space capsule, it reads: "Defecting to the United States, thanks for the ride, Good Yontiv; Yasha'."
All the while that Annie was reading the snipping slightly laughing se saw Charlie standing there holding his hands together with a devilsh but yet slightly laughing smirk on his face.
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he is standing there with a smirky smile on his face as he is using hand gestures to support himself says in a low, quiet and mischievous voice): "That's nice!"
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is standing there with the newspaper in her hand as she has a mischievous smirk on her face and is reading some more of the same snipping in a slightly laughing voice): "When questioned, the Klabiasha Embassies only statement was we didn't know he was Jewish, {at this pointe we see both Charlie and Annie laughing sarcastically}. Nudnick is believed to have with him all the tapes and records he accumulated during his 98 orbital flight. There is a rumour that Nudnick might make a surprise appearance at the 'Big Science And Space Convention', next week at 'Updyke University'."
Annie has now finished reading the snipping as she has now set the newspaper down on a sales counter and has a hand on the counter and another hand on her waist as she is standing there with her mouth agait, as she is looking at Charlie with a really surprised look on her face.
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As Charlie has a surprised and worried look on his face as he is saying to Annie in a really scared voice): "Hey, that's here!"
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As Annie has a look of dismay on her face and is saying to Charlie in a puzzled voice, as she is slowly walking up to Charlie and is pointing a finger at his with worry): "Listen, if that missing Cosmonaut is any where around this college, this place will be crawling with Secret Agents."
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he has now waved a hand at her is dis-belief as he has a looking of I don't believe it on his face as he is saying to Annie in a don't worry voice):"Enh, you've been seeing to many 'James Bond', movies."
Annie is standing there with one hand on her waist and the other one propped up to her mouth in a state of worry, as we now hear a loud thud in the background as Charlie is looking in it's direction in a total state of fear and panic.
We now see two gentlemen walking out of the book store toting two luggage cases each with looks of dismay on their faces.
{Before we go any further with the luggage case gentlemen, I just would like to say that they are burglars, and are tunneling their way through the lower basment to an adjacent bank and are carrying out the dirt in the luggage cases trying to be as inconspicuous as possible. {BURGLAR ONE NAME: JOEY ADAMS} {BURGLAR TWO NAME: ANDY ALBIN}.
BURGLAR ONE and BURGLAR TWO to CHARLIE: (As they are happily but yet slightly smiling deviously and is saying to Charlie in a really pleasant voice): "Good morning!"
CHARLIE to BURGLAR ONE and BURGLAR TWO: (As Charlie has a really happy look on his face, not knowing anything about the two gentlemen being burglars says to them in a really pleasant voice): "Good, morning!"
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is looking at Charlie with a dazed look on her face as she is asking Charlie in a questionable voice): "Who are they?"
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As Charlie has now shrugged his shoulders and has a look of mischief on his face as he is saying to Annie): "I don't know, I'm new here!"
Charlie and Annie both have cocked their heads in dismay at they watched them exit from the store.
We now see a gentleman walking into the book store dragging a piece of rope, {NAME: MILTON BERLE}. As he is now whistling happily as he is now going to the back of the book store with his rope.
CHARLIE to ROPE MAN: (As Charlie is looking at him in a state of wonderment and is using a questionable voice): "Hey, Mister?"
ROPE MAN to CHARLIE: (As he is turning around and looking at Charlie with a really mad look on his face and is saying to Charlie in a low and wicked voice): "Yeah?"
CHARLIE to ROPE MAN: (As Charlie is standing there with a dazed look on his face as he is pointing a finger at the rope and is asking him in a mad voice): "Why are you pulling that piece of rope?"
ROPE MAN to CHARLIE: (As he is standing there holding his rope and has a scared look on his face as he is answering Charlie sarcastically): "Have you ever tried pushing it?"
We now see the Rope Man tapping his piece of rope as he has given Charlie a look of madness and is now finishing going to the back of the book store. Charlie has now looked at Annie with a gazzed and worried look on his face as she is looking back at him also with a gazzed and worried look on her face.
We now see a bald headed gentleman, {NAME: CARL REINER}, walking into the book store at a brisk pace.
BALD HEADED GENTLEMAN to ANNIE and CHARLIE: (As he is looking at them with a look of mischief and is asking them in a happy and mischievous tone of voice): "I'd like something in a real hair raiser!"
ANNIE to the BALD HEADED GENTLEMAN: (As she and Charlie are now looking at him with sarcastic smiles on their faces as Annie is saying in a really mischievous voice): "Oh, you mean a murder mystery!"
BALD HEADED GENTLEMAN to ANNIE: (As he is smiling at her in happy agreement as he is saying to her in glee); "Yes!"
CHARLIE to the BALD HEADED GENTLEMAN: (As Charlie is now happily taking down a book with a gleeful look on his face as he is handing him the book says): "Oh, yeah, you'll like this, it's called: 'The Most Forgetable Barber I Ever Met'!"
We now see the Bald Headed Gentleman with a look of hurtful dismay on his face as he is taking the book from Charlie's hand.
BALDED HEADED GENTLEMAN to CHARLIE: (As he is looking at Charlie with a mad look on his face as he is saying to Charlie in a mad voice): "No, I don't think......"
We now see the Bald Headed Gentleman now looking at the book with glee as he has found a toupée in the book.
BALD HEADED GENTLEMAN to CHARLIE: (As he is happy with finding the toupée in the book as he is handing Charlie the book and is trying on the toupée): "Say, it feels like my size, that's the right colour too, how much is this book?"
ANNIE to the BALD HEADED GENTLEMAN: (As she is looking at him in a dazed state and asks him in a questionable voice): "How much have you got?"
BALD HEADED GENTLEMAN to ANNIE: (As he is standing there with a really happy look on his face and is using a happy voice as he is looking in a hand mirror and combing out his toupée has handed Annie and Charlie a money roll of at least two hundred dollars): "Oh, about this much?"
ANNIE to the BALD HEADED GENTLEMAN: (As both she and Charlie are smiling at the money wad with glee): "That's enough!"
CHARLIE to the BALD HEADED GENTLEMAN: (As Charlie is standing there with a devious look on his face as he is twitching the money roll backwards and forwards says in a mischievous voice): "Yeah, that will be plenty!"
BALD HEADED GENTLEMAN to ANNIE and CHARLIE: (As he is admiring his new toupée in a hand sized mirror and is exiting the store as 'one happy camper,' says to them gleefully): "I think I'll come back and get my teet capped, beautiful, just beautiful, I look young again."
We now see another gentleman, {NAME: STEVE ALLEN}, walking into the book store holding a hand of a kid.
BOOK STORE MAN IN SPECTACLES: (As he is using a low and quiet tone of voice as he is apologizing to 'Carl Reiner' from bumping into him and is also saying to the boy kid): "Excuse me. Right in here, sweetheart."
BOOK STORE MAN IN SPECTACLES to ANNIE and CHARLIE: (As he is approaching them at a fast pace with a serious look on his face as he is asking them very politely): "Hello, I'd like to get three pounds of hamburger, please?"
CHARLIE to the BOOK STORE MAN IN SPECTACLES: (As Charlie is looking at him with a perplexed look and is using a perplexed voice): "This ain't a butcher shoppe."
ANNIE to the BOOK STORE MAN IN SPECTACLES: (As she is looking at him in dazement as she is saying to him in a low and worried voice): "No, it's a book store."
BOOK STORE MAN IN SPECTACLES to ANNIE and CHARLIE: (As he has a look of bewilderment on his face and is using a mad voice): "A book store......?"
BOOK STORE MAN IN SPECTACLES to the KID: (As he is looking at the kid madly and is using a mad voice as he slightly shouting at the kid): "I told you we were in the wrong place!"
We now see Book Store Man In Spectacles starting to leave with the kid as he is now double-taking back like he has done a second thought.
BOOK STORE MAN IN SPECTACLES to CHARLIE: (As he has now snapped his fingers and has a look of mischief on his face as he is asking Charlie): "Oh, a book store, say do you happen to have a copy of something called: "The Sex Life Of The Armadillo?"
CHARLIE to the BOOK STORE MAN IN SPECTACLES: (As Charlie is looking at him with a bewildered look on his face as he is saying back to him in a quizzical voice): "No, we don't!"
BOOK STORE MAN IN SPECTACLES to CHARLIE: (As he is looking at Charlie with a devilsh look and is handing Charlie a book and says mischievously): "I wish you'd read mine, it's fascinating!"
BOOK STORE MAN IN SPECTACLES to the KID: (As he is exiting the store huntched ove and is waving a finger at the kid and is shouting at him in madness): "Now if you bleach your hair once more, I'm gonna tell your mama, you're gonna be in big trouble kid, let's get outta here."
All the while that Charlie was conversing with the ratherly odd gentleman customers we saw Annie standing there with her head cocked and a look of bewilderment on her face.
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he is watching the spectacles dude exiting with a look of question on his face as he is saying in a really quizzical voice): "Boy, you know, alot of screwy people come into this store!"
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she has a look of wonder on her face as she is saying to him in a worried voice): "Hey, you think they're nuts, there's a guy talking to his pipe."
We now see a close-up of an American Agent as he is communicating with headquarters through a hidden microphone located in his pipe.
FOXEY LOOKING FBI AGENT to HIS PIPE: (As he is talking with is boss in a low and secretive voice): "Yes, following routine twelve, over!"
FOREIGN AGENT, {PROFESSOR}, to HIS GOOD LOOKING CONTACT: (As we now see the back only of the Professor, Foreign Agent, using a horrible German accent responding back to his contact in a serious and low voice): "Good, procede according to instructions, Wilco!" {We now see the Foreign Agent, Professor, lowering the antenna to his walkie-talkie}.
We now see the really Handsome Pipe Agent walking into the book store at a rapid pace up to Charlie and Annie who are standing there with looks of dazement on their faces.
GOOD LOOKING PIPE AGENT to CHARLIE and ANNIE: (As he is looking at them with a perplexed look and is using a serious voice): "May I speak with Miss Anders?"
We now see Magda approaching Annie, Charlie, and the Good Looking Pipe Agent as she is writing down some notes in a notebook.
MAGDA to the GOOD LOOKING PIPE AGENT: (As she is standing there holding her notebook and is looking at him with a serious look on her face and is using a professional voice): "Well, I'm Miss Anders!"
GOOD LOOKING PIPE AGENT to MAGDA: (As he is looking at her with a serious look and is using a professional voice): "I'm James Holliston, I'm a friend of your lawyer, Mr. Raines, he told me you were a little new at this business, and asked me to stop by and see if I could lend a hand!"
MAGDA to MR. JAMES HOLLISTON: {NAME: MICHAEL FORD}: (As she is looking at Mr. Holliston with a sweet and carrying look as she is using a voice of gratitude says to Mr. Holliston): "Oh, that was so nice of Mr. Raines and you too, of course. I have been wrestling with these figures. Oh, Mr. Holliston, these are my two good friends, Annie and Charlie."
We now see Annie and Charlie smiling at Mr. Holliston with carrying and accepting smiles.
MR. HOLLISTON to ANNIE and CHARLIE: (As he is using a serious voice and has a serious look on his face): "Hello!"
ANNIE and CHARLIE to MR. HOLLISTON: (As Charlie has just nodded his head in hello and is saying to him with a really sweet smile on her face as she is using a slightly flirty voice): "How do you do?"
MAGDA to CHARLIE and ANNIE: (As Magda is standing there holding her ledger book and has a happy look on her face as she is using a happy voice says): Mr. Holliston has been kind enough to offer to help me un-tangle this mess."
MR. HOLLISTON to MAGDA: (As he is looking at Magda with a serious look and is using a slight flirty voice): "Well, I'll do what I can, I've had some experience as a bookkeeper."
As Magda was standing there interviewing Mr. Holliston we saw Charlie and Annie standing there smiling at Magda with gleeful smiles as they are now happy that she is getting some assistance with her screwed up accounting ledger sheets.
CHARLIE to MR. HOLLISTON: (As Chalie is waving his hand at him to get his attention and has a sheepish look on his face and is using a mischievous voice): "Hey, did I ever tell ya, that I got a cousin that is a bookkeeper, {Annie is now joining Charlie in unison}, everytime he borrows a book he keeps it."
We now see a Foreign Agent, {Professor Lerowski} {NAME: HENRY CORDEN} standing at the entrance doorwell of the store and is looking from side to side to be sure that he is not being followed, as he has now straightened up his suit jacket and is walking into the book store in a really dignified manner.
FOREIGN AGENT, {PROFESSOR}, to CHARLIE: (As he is now clearing his throat and is getting Charlie's attention as he is looking at Charlie with a dignifide look and is using a dignified voice): "Unhmn!"
CHARLIE to the FOREIGN AGENT, {PROFESSOR}: (As Charlie is looking at him in a state of mischief and is answering him back in a professional voice): "Oh, yes sir?"
FOREIGN AGENT, {PROFESSOR}, to CHARLIE: (As he is looking at Charlie with a sheepish look on his face and is supporting a serious voice asks): "I beg your pardon, where is the section on research books of salt mines?"
CHARLIE to the FOREIGN AGENT, {PROFESSOR}: (As Charlie is looking in the air thinking of the location of the books that the Foreign Agent, Professor wanted as he is saying to him): "Salt mines, next aisle over sir, you'll find them between the salt herring and the salted peanuts."
FOREIGN AGENT, {PROFESSOR}, to CHARLIE: (As he bows down at Charlie in a state of politeness as he says to Charlie in a polite voice): "Thank-you!"
CHARLIE to the FOREIGN AGENT, {PROFESSOR}: (As Charlie is smiling back at him polietly and says in a polite voice): "You're welcome!"
We now see the Foreign Agent, {Professor}, give Charlie a really weird look to see if Charlie is Yasha Nudnick before he goes to the book section on salt mines as Charlie is standing there straightening some books on a portable book cart with a look of bewilderment on his face and with a devilsh smile on his face.
We now see both Magda and Mr. Holliston at the front counter working on the accounting ledger sheets in serious states.
MAGDA to MR. HOLLISTON: (As she is looking at him with a sweet smile and using a gleeful voice): "Mr. Holliston, I can't tell you how much I appreciate all your help, I'd be lost without you!"
MR. HOLLISTON to MAGDA: (As he holding the accounting ledger sheets and is looking at her with a serious look and is saying to Magda in a appreciative voice): I hope so."
MAGDA to MR. HOLLISTON: (As she is standing there with a friendly smile on her face and is saying in a friendly voice): "Unhmn, am I taking you away from something, like your work?"
MR. HOLLISTON to MAGDA: (As he is standing there looking at her sweetly and slightly flirtatious and is using a flirty voice): "As a matter of fact, I just started a three week vacation. I cannot think of a nicer way to spend it that this."
MAGDA to MR. HOLLISTON: (As she has a surprised look on her face and is using a surprised voice): "Haaah, Oh, I almost forgot. I have to run down the street for a minute, would you mind taking over for awhile?"
MR. HOLLISTON to MAGDA: (As he is standing there with a full blown look of flirt on his kisser and is saying to her in a carrying and flirting voice): "of course!"
We now see Magda exiting the book store to go and complete her errand as Mr. Holliston is now busy working on balancing out the accounting ledger sheets.
MAGDA to MR. HOLLISTON: (As she has now turned around with a look of love on her face as she is saying to him in a sweet voice): "Mr. Holliston?"
MR. HOLLISTON to MAGDA: (As he is standing there with a huge smile of love on his face as he says to her in a loving voice): "Call me, Jim!"
MAGDA to MR. HOLLISTON: (As she is standing there smiling at him with a sweet smile and says in a mischievous voice): "Okay, Jim, when you get a chance would you mind stripping off some shelving paper for me?"
MR. HOLLISTON to MAGDA: (As he is looking at her lovingly as he says to her in a really flirty tone of voice): "I'd be glad to, Magda."
We now see Charlie standing there with a happy look on his face about Magda and Mr. Holliston being friends as he is waving good-bye to Magda she gives Charlie a quick smile and waves good-bye as she is exiting from the store as Mr. Holliston is ripping off three feet sheets of shelving paper.
We now see a humongous sized lady walking into the book store, dressed in a queen-sized Moo-Moo, with a giant collection of flowers in her hair on both sides of her head and is toting a humongous sized pocketbook also with a giant collection of flowers on the front of it. {She happens to be the 'Fat Lady Assasin', played by:} {NAME: 'PEGGY MONDO'}.
She is now giving Charlie, {Yasha} a giant smile of glee as she is waving to him all the while thinking she has come upon Yasha Nudnick. We now see Charlie looing at the 'Fat Lady' with a polite look and is waving his hand in a state of get out of here.
We now see the 'Fat Assasin Lady' walking up to Charlie in a sweet and adorning way as is sweetly tapping Charlie on his shoulder as Charlie is busy working on a stack of books on the portable book cart.
CHARLIE to the FAT ASSASIN LADY: (As Charlie is now turning around and greeting her professionally): "Yes, mame?"
FAT ASSASIN LADY to CHARLIE: (As she is standing giggling in happiness as she is saying to Charlie in a giggly voice): "I beg your pardon!"
CHARLIE to the FAT ASSASIN LADY: (As Charlie is standing there looking at her with a worried look as he is saying in a professional voice): "Why, what did you do?"
FAT ASSASIN LADY to CHARLIE: (As she is starring at Charlie and wondering if he Yasha Nudnick as she is in a giggly state): Heee, heee, nothing, hunh, hyunh, hunh, I'm looking for a book, of good poems."
CHARLIE to the FAT ASSASIN LADY: (As Charlie is looking at her in wonderment as he is using a questionable voice as she is standing there giggling): "Poems?"
FAT ASSASIN LADY to CHARLIE: (As she is standing there smiling gleefully and is using a giggly voice says): "Humhna, do you like Kipling?"
CHARLIE to the FAT ASSASIN LADY: (As he is standing there with a bewildered look and is using a bewildere voice): "I don't know, I never, Kippled!"
We now see Charlie and the Fat Assasin Lady standing there laughing hysterically with one another over Charlie's joke. The Fat Assasin Lady has now dropped her humongous sized pocketbook spilling out a wide arrangement of arsenal weapons which included: 'a Colt .38 snub-nosed gat, a 9 millimetre gat, a switchblade, a billyclub, and a live hand grenade'.
We now see Charlie with a really worried and petrified look on his face as he is now bending over and is picking up the hand grenade and is thinking about pulling out the pin.
FAT ASSASIN LADY to CHARLIE: (As she is now standing there with a really worried look on her face as she is using a worried voice and is trying to cover-up her mistake): "Those are some of my son's toys."
CHARLIE to the FAT ASSASIN LADY: (As he is holding the hand grenade and has a really scared look on his face and is using a petrified voice): "Who is you kid, John Dillenger?"
FAT ASSASIN LADY to CHARLIE: (As she is standing laughing out of a state of fright and has a scared and laughing look on her face says): "They do look realy, don't they?"
CHARLIE to the FAT ASSASIN LADY: (As Charlie is standing there with a bewildered look and is using a scared voice): "Yeah, they sure do."
We now see the Fat Assasin Lady grabbing the hand grenade from Charlie in a laughing and nervous state as Charlie was trying to pull the pin with a look of fear on his face.
FAT ASSASIN LADY to CHARLIE: (As she is using a stammering and scared voic as she is now taking the grenade from Chalie and is putting it in the pocket of her Moo-Moo says in a laughing and nervous voice): "No, no, I wouldn't, no, no, don't do that."
We now see Charlie and the Fat Assasin Lady bending over and picking up her humongous pocketbook of assorted arsenal as the Fat Assasin Lady has now split the back of her Moo-Moo wide open along with her bloomers. She is now exiting the book store in a total state of embarrassment as she is holding closed her Moo-Moo and extra giant sized bloomers. Charlie is standing there looking at her with a scared look as we also see Mr. Holliston standing behind the main counter looking at her in a state of scaredness. The Fat Assasin Lady is backing out of the store crying in embarrassment and waving good-bye totally embarrassed out.
Charlie is now standing there yawning and stretching as he now has a look of scaredness on his face as he now has ripped open the back of his suit jacket. We now see Mr. Holliston ripping of some more three feet stripes of shelving paper diligently for Magda. Charlie is now walking away in a state of happiness as he thinks now the ripping noise was shelving paper not his suit jacket as we now see the back of his jacket split wide open.
Mr. Holliston has now looked at his watch as Annie is approaching him with a happy look on her face as he is looking at her with a worried look.
MR. HOLLISTON to ANNIE: (As he is looking at her in a serious way and is asking Annie in a professional voice): "Annie would you mind watching the cash register for a minute?"
ANNIE to MR. HOLLISTON: (As she is smiling at him mischievously and is using a mischievous voice): "Sure, do you mind if I take a few samples?"
MR. HOLLISTON to ANNIE: (As he is looking at her seriously as he is saying to her in a grateful voice): "Thanks!"
We now see Mr. Holliston mysteriously walking to the back of the store as Annie is now going behind the cash register watching him eerily and with a scared look on her face as we saw Mr. Holliston pick-up a book and mysteriously exit with it to another part of the store. We now see the Foreign Agent, {Professor} walking slowly and eerily in the same direction as Mr. Holliston also flipping through a book. Annie is wathcing the whole preceedings from the main counter in a state of wonderment.
MAGDA to ANNIE: (As Magda is now walking briskly into the book store with a happy look on her face as Annie is smiling back at her mischievously and is acting nonchalantly about what she just saw as Magda is using a serious voice): "Hi Annie, well I guess it is about time to close-up."
MAGDA to ANNIE: (As Magda is looking at Annie with a worried look and is using a worried voice as she is asking Annie in a questionable voice): "Annie, where's Jim?"
ANNIE to MAGDA: (As Annie has a look of wonder on her face as she is using a scared voice and trying to hide the shenanigans about what is happening at the back of the store): "Oh, he's around someplace."
We now see Annie with a huge smile on her face as she is leaving the main counter and is walking up to Charlie in a state of fear as Magda is now finishing up some things.
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is approaching Charlie in a happy mood and is saying to Charlie in a gleeful voice): "Charlie, time to close-up."
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (With a look of happiness and is using a happy voice): "All right."
We now see Charlie putting down some books on his portable cart with a serious look on his face. We are now on our second go around with the idiot burlars as they are now happily and mischievously walking into the book store with their luggage cases as they are now going to the back to work on their tunneling to the adjacent bank.
Charlie has now stopped the two burglars as he is putting up his arms in a stop fashion as he has a look dumbfoundedness on his face as the burglars are standing there looking at Charlie with really evil looks on their faces.
CHARLIE to the TWO BURGLARS: (As he has a look of dumbfondedness on his face and is using an apologetic voice): "Sorry fellas, we're just closing up."
BURGLAR ONE to CHARLIE: (As he has now shoved Charlie out of his way with one of his luggage cases says in an evil voice): "Yeah, I know."
We now see the two burglars trying to go to the lower basement to working on their tunneling project as Charlie is looking at them in a worried state.
CHARLIE to the TWO BURGLARS: (As Charlie has a dazed look on his face and is shouting at them): "Wait a minute, you don't understand fellas, we're closing!"
We now see Charlie in a state of worry following behind the burglars to see what in the world is going on.
START OF THE CHARLIE AND BURGLARS MAZE GAME:
We are now starting our grandé maze game as one Burglar is running through the front portion of the store as Charlie is running through the back of the store trying to find them while we see the Second Burglar going in a third and completly oppsite direction, down book aisle four. As the two burglars are now trying to lose Charlie and get back to their tunneling details.
We now see Burglar One nodding his head a Burglar Two as to say the coast is clear as Burglar Two does a quick look down one of the aisles for Charlie. Charlie is now at the front of the book store as he is going East looking for the Two Burglars as the two burglars are now going in a westerly direction. Charlie is now heading south down the third book aisle looking for the two burglars as they are now coming north and are running quickly down the main aisle as one of the burglars turns right towards the main out door while the other burglar turns left going to the direction of the lower cellar. We now see Charlie at the far east part of the store as he is now peaking around the book shelves down the main aisle looking for the two burglars. We now see the two burglars carrying their luggage cases tip toeing quietly in a southern direction towards the main door through aisle three as we see Charlie tip toeing in a northerly direction at the front of the store looking for the burglars. The two burglars have now tip toed down the main aisle heading south. They have now made a quick turn left and are now at the back of the store as they have now noticed for the time being Charlie is now where in sight. They are making a quick tip toeing break for it down the main side aisle of the store. One burglar has now turned right down the main aisle towards the out door. The other burglar has turned left towards the lower cellar while we see Charlie coming out from the second aisle and is walking briskly to the back of the store looking for the two suspicious critters. Charlie has now turned right at the back of the store. The two burglrs are in front of the store and are turning right and are running up the main aisle towards the back of the store. Charlie has now made a quick peak from the second aisle looking down the main aisle towards the front of the store for the burglars. We now see the two burglars walking backwards as one is heading down the main aisle from the front of the store while the other one is coming from the back of the store. The two burglars have now bumped backsides and had a look of panic on their faces. One of burglars is now high tailing it to the right down aisle two while the other burglar has high tailed it to the left down aisle four. Charlie has now made a quick peak down the main side aisle to his left towards the front of the store looking for the burglars as one of the burglars is standing at the front of the store taking a quick peak right down the main aisle towards the back of the store looking for Charlie. The two burglars have now joined forces and have now noticed once again for the time being the coast is Charlie Free. They now have tip toed to the mid-way section of the store while on went righ down a side aisle and the other burglar went to his left down aisle four. We now see Charlie walking down the main side aisle with a perplexed look on his face as he has now stopped at the front of the store with one arm crossed and the other other one propped on top of it with his hand on his chin as he is now thinking where in the world can those two suspicious critters could be. Charlie has now turned around and is heading to the back of the store not knowing it he is being followed by the burglars. The burglars made a qucik run for it to their left down side aisle one for a hopeful break while Charlie is standing there at the mid-way pointe of the second side aisle with his hands in his trousers pockets, as he is looking for them down aisle four. Charlie has now turned around with a look of bewilderment as he has now scratched his head and used hand gestures to say I give up. He is now heading for the front of the store down aisle two. As of now the burglars have won the maze game with Charlie.
END OF CHARLIE AND BURGLARS MAZE GAME:
Charlie is now walking up to the front of the store at a brisk pace with a look of mischief on his face as we see Annie behind the counter finishing up some daily paperwork. Magda is standing there with a worried look on her face as she is putting on her gloves. Mr. Holliston is standing by Magda also with a worried look on his face.
MR. HOLLISTON to ANNIE and CHARLIE: (In a serious manner): "Good night Charlie, Good night Annie."
ANNIE to MAGDA: (As she is still behind the counter finishing her paperwork says to Magda in a serious voice): "I'm gonna stay with Charlie and fix him dinner."
MAGDA to CHARLIE: (As she is smiling sweetly at Charlie and says in a sweet voice): "Good night, Charlie!"
MAGDA to ANNIE: (As she is looking at Annie with a worried look and using a worried voice): "Annie, I'll see you at the apartment."
CHARLIE to MAGDA and MR. HOLLISTON: (In a carrying state says): "Good night!"
MR. HOLLISTON to ANNIE and CHARLIE: (In a serious voice and with a serious look on his face): "Good night!"
We now see Magda holding Jim's arm as they are now exiting the store to retire for the night.
ANNIE to JIM: (As Jim and Magda were exiting the store and Annie is calling back to him in a mischievous manner): "Ooooh, Jim, aaaah, who was that fellow you were talking to, you know, unha-ha, beaver with glasses." {Right here to help express herself Annie has now licked her thumb and has pounded her fists together in mischief}.
We now see Mr. Holliston turning back and is looking at Annie madly and with an evil look as Magda is looking at Annie with a worried look.
ANNIE to MR. HOLLISTON: (As Annie has a devilsh look on her face and mischief in her voice as she is trying to pry some secret information out of Mr. Hollistone): "The one with the foreign accent?"
MR. HOLLISTON to ANNIE: (As he is now glarring at Annie evily and is using a scard voice as he is trying to cover up his tracks about being caught): "I don't know what you are talking about Annie, I don't know anyone like that."
All the while that Annie was behind the counter giving Mr. Holliston the "THIRD DEGREE" Charlie was leaning on the counter giving him an evil look.
ANNIE to MR. HOLLISTON: (As she has a look of defeat on her face and is using a defeat voice): "You don't?"
MR. HOLLISTON to ANNIE: (As he is glarring wickedly and is using a evil voice says): "No, we'll see you tomorrow."
CHARLIE to MR. HOLLISTON and MAGDA: (As Charlie as a wicked look on his face and using a mischievous voice): "Good, night."
Mr. Holliston has now turned to exit the store as he has a hand on Magda's arm as Magda is smiling at Annie and Charlie with a sweet smile. We now see Charlie closing the main doors and is locking up for the night. Annie is now sitting at the main counter lost in her thoughts as she is tapping her pencil on her chin contemplating what she saw in the store betwixt Mr. Holliston and the Foreign Agent.
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As Charlie is standing there giving Annie a dazed look and is saying in a questionable voice): "Well, are you gonna fix dinner, or are ya gonna sit there and stare?"
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is now getting up from the counter with a mad look on her face and is saying to Charlie in a sarcastic voice): "All right, I'm comin', I'm comin'."
We now see Charlie bending over in a state of mischief as he is pointing an arm in the direction of his flat as Annie is now pointing her arm in the same direction with a wicked look on her face says. {"Thank-you"}.
MR. HOLLISTON to MAGDA: (As he is saying to Magda in a worried voice in reference to Annie's question about him and the foreign dude): "I guess she got me confused with someone else."
MAGDA to MR. HOLLISTON: (As she is smiling at him sweetly and is using a carrying voice says about them): "Oh, Annie and Charlie are a bit strange sometimes, but they're really very nice people."
MR. HOLLISTON to MAGDA: (As they are now standing in front of her flat complex as he is looking at her sweetly says): "So are you?"
MAGDA to MR. HOLLISTON: (As she is looking at him in dismay and is answering him slightly mad): "Strange?"
MR. HOLLISTON to MAGDA: (As he is looking at her with a really sweet look and is saying to her in a loving voice): "No, very nice!"
MAGDA to MR. HOLLISTON: (As she is smiling at him sweetly and is saying in a loving voice): "Thank-you, and may I return the complement!"
MR. HOLLISTON to MAGDA: (As he is standing there with goo-goo eyes and is using a carrying voice): "We're beginning to sound like a mutal admiration society."
MAGDA to MR. HOLLISTON: (As she is giving him goo-goo eyes and is saying to him in a really carrying voice): "I have to thank-you once again for your helping me."
MR. HOLLISTON to MAGDA: (As he has one hand rested gently on her arm and is looking at her lovingly): "Believe me, it's been a labour of love."
We are now back inside of the store where we are seeing one dark, dreery and eerie un-covered light bulb hanging from the ceiling. We are now eerily and spookedly walking through the store where we now see 'MUTT AND JEFF' the two idiot burglars sitting together on the basement steps getting ready for another night of digging details as we see them hanging a luncheon pail one one nail just outside of the doorway and are hanging an empty luggage case on another nail. The two burglars are now sitting next to one another chewing on a plug of chaw tobaccie as they are examining a small map.
BURGLAR TWO to BURGLAR ONE: (As Burglar Two is sitting there looking at him with a really worried look on his face as he is asking his partner in a questionable voice): "You sure you know what you are doing?"
BURGLAR ONE to BURGLAR TWO: (As the two idiots are sitting there as Burglar One is saying to his partner in a wicked voice): :Sure, I'm sure, didn't I bring my little boys comapss to cheque?"
We now see Burglar One taking the compass from his coat pocket as it is doing the 'Euphrates Twitch,' not being able to detect directions.
BURGLAR TWO to BURGLAR ONE: (As Burglar Two is watching the compass doing the 'Euphrates Twitch,' as he is saying to his partner in a panicking voice): "It don't look too good to me."
BURGLAR ONE to BURGLAR TWO: (As he is now putting the toy compass back into his coat pocket as he is looking at his partner in sheer madness): "If it's good enough for my kid, it's good enough for you. Come on, let's get to work."
We now see Burglar Two standing up and hitting his head hard on a water pipe as he is yelling loudly in pain, 'ooooh, ooooh, ooooh, ooooh, ooooh'.
BURGLAR ONE to BURGALR TWO: (As he is looking at him in madness is shouting): "S-S-S-H-H-H, S-S-S-H-H-H-, S-S-S-H-H-H!"
We now see burglar two rubbing his head in pain as he is now putting up the wooden board to cover-up their digging details. They are now once again filling their luggage cases with dirt and rocks getting a tad closer to the bank they wanna robe.
We now see 'DING and DONG' busy at their work as Burglar Two is laying on the dirt and is in a slightly lazy mood as he is hap-hazzardly picking at the dirt with a pick axe. He is now throwing rocks into the luggage case one at a time. Burglar One is double timing it as he is throwing large spadefuls of dirt into the luggage case. Burglar One is quickly jumping up and is hitting his head hard on a pipe as he is now tossing his spadeful of dirt behind him in pain.
BURGLAR TWO to BURGLAR ONE: (As he is laying on the dirt with a really mad look and is saying at first in a really quiet tone of voice and is now raising it several crescendos as he is hitting Burglar One with his hat): "Gently, gently, gently!"
BURGLAR ONE to BURGLAR TWO: (As Burglar One is now waving his hands at Burglar Two in madness is saying to him in a really mad voice): "S-S-S-H-H-H; S-S-S-H-H-H; S-S-S-H-H-H; S-S-S-H-H-H; S-S-S-H-H-H; S-S-S-H-H-H; gently; gently; gently; gently; gently; gently!"
We are now back in side of Charlie's haunted flat where we now see a really eeire looking rocking chair, as is is sitting rocking to and fro by itself. Charlie is sitting at his table holding a newspaper that he was reading as he now looks at the haunted chair with a scared look. Annie is in front of the stove preparing spaghetti for supper. Charlie has now nodded his head in a state of whatever at the chair rocking by itself as he is now reading his paper.
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As Charlie is sitting at the table and is reading to Annie the help wanted ads as Charlie is now reading on in mischief): "Hey, look at this!: WANTED: "Job as secretary, no bad habits, willing to learn!"
Annie has now looked at Charlie and has quietly laughed at the ad. Charlie is still is happily reading the different newspaper snippings as Annie is still in the process of making the spaghetti.
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he is now in a full blown state of mischief as he is reading another funny advertisment snipping): "FOR SALE: Light house, suitable for tall thin man, who likes seagulls."
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she looking at Charlie with a worried look on her face as she is putting salt into the noodles water as she is asking Charlie in a serious voice): "Say, anything about the missing cosmonaut?"
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As Charlie has a look of wonder on his face as he is saying to Annie seriously): "Ooooh, yeah!"
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is stirring the spaghetti sauce and has a mad look on her face as she is shouting madly at Charlie): "Well, what does it say?"
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (In a full blown state of mischief says): "It says he's missing!"
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is looking at Charlie with a wicked look and is saying in a sarcastic voice): "Thanks!"
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is standing there stirring the spaghetti sauce and is looking at Charlie with a bewildered look as she is asking Charlie in a questionable voice): "What does it say about the Science and Space Convention that they're having here next week?"
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As Charlie has now found the snipping related to it as he is sitting there reading to Annie seriously): "Oh, here it is, the F.B.I. announced today that in conjunction with the local authorities they will provide security coverage and protection to the visiting delagates during the coming conclave!"
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is still working on the spaghetti as she is looking at Charlie in a state of worry and is saying to Charlie in a worried voice): "Boy, this place is going to be crawling with spies, you wait and see."
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he is sitting there totally engulfed in his newspaper is saying to her nonchalantly): "Yeah!"
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is pointing a finger at him and has a look of devilment on her face and is saying to Charlie in a surprised voice): "Hey, come to think of it, I saw something very funny happen today!"
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he is looking at Annie with a quizzical look and a devil may care voice): "What?"
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is looking at Charlie with a sheepish look and using a surprised voice): "Do you remember that guy with the beard, and the accent, and the glasses?"
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As Charlie has now looked upwards for a second remembering the dude is saying to Annie seriously): "Ooooh, yeah!"
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As Annie is looking at Charlie with a quizzical look on her face and is saying in a scared voice): "Well, I saw him and Jim talking in the back of the store."
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As Charlie is looking at Annie with a grimace look and is saying nonchalantly): "Probably means nothing."
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is looking at Charlie with a mad look and is using a sarcastic voice): "Yeah, it's all pretty sneaky, and when I asked Jim about it, he said he didn't even know the guy, you heard him!"
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As Charlie has a perplexed look on his face and is saying to Annie in a re-assuring voice): "Well, I wouldn't worry about it, that Jim's a nice fellow."
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is standing there with a disgusted ook on her face and is using a disgusted voice): "Yeah, they're the worse kind."
Annie has now added the spaghetti noodles to the boiling water pot as we see Charlie still sitting at the table with a dismayed look on his face as he is still happily reading his newspaper.
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he is sitting there reading his newspaper with a nonchalant look and is saying to her nonchalantly): "Oh, we'll keep an eye on him."
We now see Charlie looking up from his newspaper with a really scared look on his face as he is seeing the chair rocking by itself as he has now put a hand to his chin in a state of wonderment.
It is now the next day where we see Magda, Annie, Mr. Holliston, and two college students standing out in front of the book store, waiting impatiently for Charlie to open the door. We now see Charlie who was late walking up stretching and yawning as he is now walking up to the door and is letting them in to complete another day of trade.
CHARLIE to ANNIE, MAGDA, and MR. HOLLISTON: (As Charlie has now opened the door and is waving his hand at them in the hello sign as he is saying to them in a happy voice): "Good morning."
ANNIE and MAGDA to CHARLIE: (As they are smiling happily at Charlie as they are saying in a happy voice): "Good morning."
CHARLIE to MR. HOLLISTON: (As Charlie is looking at him in a state of wonderment and is waving his hand at him and is using a happy voice): "Good morning."
MR. HOLLISTON to CHARLIE: (In a full blown state of happiness and is using a low and monotone voice): "Good morning, Charlie!"
He we go again, take four with 'Ding and Dong' the two idiot burglars as they are now coming once again face to face with Charlie as they have evil looks on their faces and are toting more dirt out in their luggage cases.
BURGLAR ONE and BURGLAR TWO to CHARLIE: (As he has an evil look on his face as he is saying to Charlie in a wicked voice): "Good morning."
CHARLIE to the TWO BURGLARS: (In a really happy voice and a happy look on his face): "Good morning."
We now see a different wall of the book store where we see three pictures:
1: "A really old wooden chair, with one leg missing, and holes in the cane bottom, and a cracked wooden box sitting on it and and a picnic hamper with half of the handle busted off."
2: "A modern art drawing of a man made out of four thin lines, he has on swim trunks, holding a surfing board, wearing a hat, as he is walking out of the changing room to go surfing."
3: "A very beautiful girl ice skater, dressed in a lace style skate dress, hair in a pony tail, as she is doing a double lay-out."
Plus sitting on a high shelf a stuffed Mina Bird.
We now seeing Charlie stopping dead in his tracks as he now recalls where he has seen those two dudes before. Charlie now see's a trail of water leading from their basement hide-out, as he is standing there scratching his head in bewilderment as he is examining the water trail.
We now see the very beautiful Oriental student, {NAME: 'YAN SHAN TUNG'}, wearing a letter jacket with her hair tied in a bun and she is smiling sweetly at Charlie. Charlie is now smiling back at her with a really lovely smile.
CHARLIE to the CHINESE FRENCH WOMAN: (As he is saying to her in a really sweet voice): "Oh, hi!"
We now see the Chinese French Woman talking to Charlie in fluent French as Charlie is looking at her with his hands on his waist and a look on his face as if to say, what in the world are you saying. As she is asking Charlie about some sort of book we are now seeing her French being translated in Chinese characters.
CHARLIE to the CHINESE FRENCH WOMAN: (As Charlie is standing there looking at her sweetly and is trying to be sophisticated says to her back in horrible French): "Oui, oui, mademisille." {Yeah, Yeah, Lady}.
The Chinese French Woman has now asked Charlie some more information about some research materials in French with Chinese sub-titles. Charlie is now looking at her with a look on his face as if to say I have no idea what you just said as he is now shrugging his shoulders at her. She has now shrugged her shoulders at Charlie as she is waving a hand in total disgust at Charlie not being able to understand her as she is exiting the book store in a total state of disgust.
MAGDA to ANNIE and CHARLIE: (As she is running out into the main sales area in a state of panic as she is shouting at Charlie and Annie in a state of panic): "Annie, Charlie, come here quick!"
We now see Charlie and Annie going with Magda in a state of panic as she is showing them a part of the store that is totally scattered with sheets of paper all over the counter and floor.
CHARLIE to MAGDA: (As Charlie has a look of panic on his face as with Annie as Charlie is now asking Magda in a panicking voice): "Oh, what's the matter, what happened?"
MAGDA to CHARLIE: (As she is standing there with her hands on her waist as she has a look of panic on her face as she is saying to Charlie in a panicking voice): "I don't know, but it certainly wasn't like this last night when we left."
ANNIE to MAGDA: (As Annie is now looking at the paper mess in a state of panic as she is saying to Magda in a hurtful voice): "Boy, somebody was looking for something, all right."
MR. HOLLISTON to CHARLIE: (As he is looking at Charlie with a mad look and is using a mad voice): "Charlie, you sere here last night, didn't you here anything?"
CHARLIE to MR. HOLLISTON: (As Charlie is standing there with a surprised look on his face as he is saying a scared voice): "Well, no, nothing unusual, wait, no I didn't."
We now see Annie standing there with her hand on her waist as she has a look of total disgust over Charlie as Magda is standing there in a total state of fear.
MAGDA to CHARLIE, ANNIE, and MR. HOLLISTON: (As she is looking at them with a look of fear on her face as she is saying in fearful voice): "I'm going to call the Police."
MR. HOLLISTON to MAGDA: (As he is standing there with a carrying look on his face as he is saying to Magda in a carrying voice): "Now Magda, there's probably nothing missing, why do you want alot of Policemen all over the place?"
We nw see Charlie and Annies glarring at Mr. Holliston with evil looks as Annie has her hands on her waist in madness.
MAGDA to MR. HOLLISTON: (As she is standing there looking at him with a look of hurt on her face as she is saying to him in a hurtful voice): "What if there's anything missing or not, somebody got in here last night and caused this mess and now I'm gonna call the Police."
We now see Magda exiting in a state of fear as she is going to telephone the Police as Mr. Holliston is now in a state of panic as he has a look of panic on his face as he is chasing after Magda in fear.
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As Annie is looking at Charlie with a mad look as she hits Charlie on his arm and is saying to Charlie in a disgusted voice): "You see, you see, I told you there was something fishey about that Jim, he didn't want Magda to call the cops. I'm telling you we gotta watch him every minute."
We are now back outside at Comrade Olga's convertible where we see both her and Comrade Seed sitting there with really evil looks ln their faces as Comrade Seed is now opening a box and is showing to Comrade Olga a turtle in which he planted a small microphone and transmitter under his shell.
COMRADE OLGA to COMRADE SEED: (As Comrade Seed is now showing her a box as she is asking him in a serious voice): "What's in there?"
COMRADE SEED to COMRADE OLGA: (As he is now opening the box and has a wicked look on his face as he is saying in an evil voice): "A turtle, I planted a small microphone and transmitter under it's shell, if Nudnick says what I think he's gonna say we won't need any pictures!"
COMRADE OLGA to COMRADE SEED: (As she is looking at him wickedly and is saying in an evil voice): "Good!"
COMRADE SEED to COMRADE OLGA: (As he is still holding his turtle box and has a look of bewilderment on his face as he is saying in a serious voice): "This special transmitter set, it's small, but very powerful, it'll pick-up everything he says."
COMRADE OLGA to COMRADE SEED: (As she is now taking the turtle from him as she has an evil look on her face and is saying in a wicked voice): "Leave it to me!"
We now see Comrade Seed watching Comrade Olga leaving her automobile with the loaded turtle. We are now back inside of the book store where we see Magda with a couple of Police Officers from the Updyke Police Force as they are now examining the break in.
UPDYKE CHIEF OF POLICE {NAME: RICHARD DEACON} to MAGDA: (As he is standing there looking at her with a mad look on his face as he is asking her in a questionable voice): "Unh, humnh, you're sure nothing was stollen?"
MAGDA to the UPDYKE CHIEF OF POLICE: (As she is standing there looking at him with a panicked look on her face as she is saying to him): "I don't think so, Charlie?"
CHARLIE to MAGDA: (As he is approaching Magda in a serious state as he is asking her in a carrying voice): "What is it, Magda?"
MAGDA to CHARLIE: (As she is looking at Charlie with a hurtful look as she is introducing Charlie to the Police Officer): "Charlie, this is the Chief Of Police!"
CHARLIE to the UPDYKE CHIEF OF POLICE: (As Charlie has a mischievous look on his face and a mischievous voice): "Aaaah, who did it?"
UPDYKE CHIEF OF POLICE to CHARLIE: (As he is looking at Charlie in a perplexed state): "Who did it?"
CHARLIE to the UPDYKE CHIEF OF POLICE: (As Charlie is looking at him with a dazed look and is using a sarcastic voice): "I asked you first!"
UPDYKE CHIEF OF POLICE to CHARLIE: (As he is standing there with a disdained look on his face as he is shouting madly): "We just got here?"
CHARLIE to the UPDYKE CHIEF OF POLICE: (As Charlie is now in a full blown state of mischief): "And, you didn't solve it yet? Boy you wouldn't last two minutes on T.V. How did you get this job, are you the Major's Brother-In-Law, or something?"
MAGDA to CHARLIE: (As she is looking at Charlie in a disgusted state): "Now Charlie, please?"
CHARLIE to the UPDYKE CHIEF OF POLICE: (As Charlie has a look of mischief on his face and is using a mischievous voice): "Oh, no offense meant Chief, just thought I could be of help, you know, I know all about this detectiving. I took a correspondence cours in detectiving, and everything was going swell, until one day one of the letters got mixed with a plumbing lesson and I wound up arresting a leakey faucet, haaa, haaa, haaa, haaa, haaa, haaa!"
We now see the Updyke Chief Of Police standing there in a full blown state of madness as he has his hands on his waist in madness while his partner was standing there with a look of madness on his face as Magda is slightly laughing at Charlie's joke.
CHARLIE to the UPDYKE CHIEF OF POLICE: (As Charlie is now using a mischievous tone of voice with a look of mischief says): "A leakey...... , I wound up...... , he got no sense of humour."
UPDYKE CHIEF OF POLICE to CHARLIE: (As he is looking at Charlie with a mad look and is using a mad voice): "This lady tells me you were in the store all night!"
CHARLIE to the UPDYKE CHIEF OF POLICE: (As Charlie has a scared look on his face is answering back in a scared voice): "I was."
UPDYKE CHIEF OF POLICE to CHARLIE: (As he is standing there looking at Charlie in a thorough state of disgust and is shouting at Charlie): "I understood, that no doors or windows were tampered with. I think it's an inside job." {He is looking at Charlie really mad suspecting Charle}.
UPDYKE CHIEF OF POLICE to MAGDA: (As he is looking at her with a carrying look and is using a carrying voice): "Nothing was stolen, but they're after something, we'll find out what is is, come on Bruce."
We now see the Updyke Chief Of Police and his partner Bruce exiting the store in a professional manner.
CHARLIE to MAGDA: (As Charlie is standing there holding hand-sized feather duster as he has a look of puzzlement on his face as he is saying to her in a mischievous voice): "Nice fella, did you notice the way he brightens up the place when he leaves it?"
Magda is now exiting from Charlie in a thorough state of disgust as we see Annie peaking around one of the book cases in a state of panic.
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As Annie is standing behind the book case as she is shouting at Charlie in a whisper, as she is using hand gestures for the come here sign): "P-s-s-s-t, Charlie, Charlie, come here."
Charlie is now approaching Annie as the two of them are now spying on Mr. Holliston and the Foreign Agent with dazed looks on their faces.
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As they are now backing up as not to be noticed about their spy-job as Annie has a look of bewilderment on her face and Charlie has a scared look on his face as Annie is saying to him): "you see, you see, what did I tell ya? Now we gotta find what they're up too. I'll go down this aisle on her right}, you wait a minute, then you follow me, right?, but be sure, and act natural."
We now see Annie going down the aisle to spy on Mr. Holliston and the Foreign Agent as Charlie has now slightly boogied up to the front of the store.
We now see Annie standing behind a book case as she is listening in on Mr. Holliston's conversation with the Foreign Agent.
MR. HOLLISTON to the FOREIGN AGENT: (As Mr. Holliston is saying to him in a low and quiet voice): "I'm sure things are coming to a head after the activities last night."
FOREIGN AGENT to MR. HOLLISTON: (As he is looking at Mr. Holliston with a serious look and is using a mischievous voice): "Humnh, it is possible that they are looking for the passage to the secret radio room, headquarters contacted me this morning, they want all of this settled up before the Science and Space Convention."
MR. HOLLISTON to the FOREIGN AGENT: (As he is standing there in a professional manner as he is using a low and quiet voice): "Professor, you'll have to stop using your radio, or they'll trace your hide-out!"
FOREIGN AGENT to MR. HOLLISTON: (As he is in a full blown serious state): "There is possibly two that they might try again tonight and I really hate that the local Police were brought into this."
MR. HOLLISTON to the FOREIGN AGENT: (In a full blown serious state): "This could be as important as the H-Bomb."
All the while that Mr. Holliston and the Professor were engaged in their secret conversation, we saw Annie peaking at them from her now location through a shelf of books. The Foreign Agent, {Professor}, has now slammed his book shut causing Annie to jump and hit her forehead against a book case.
Annie is still standing underneath the ladder peaking through a shelf of books spying on Mr. Holliston and the Foreign Agent {Profesor} as Charile is now approaching Annie with a very tall cart of books as he has now hit Annie with them.
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (With a mad look on his face and is shouting at Annie in a mad voice as Annie is now brushing dirt off her dress and has a mad look on her face): "What's going on here. I'm trying to keep this place clean. You're making it a mess!"
We now see our friends 'Mutt and Jeff', {the two burglars} approaching Charlie and Annie with more luggage cases with dirt as they have really wicked looks on their faces.
BURGLAR ONE to ANNIE and CHARLIE: (As he is shouting at them with an evil voice): "Please, do you mind?"
BURGLAR TWO to ANNIE and CHARLIE: (As he has now passed them with an evil look on his face as he tipped his hat at them says wickedly): "Thank-you!"
We now see 'Mutt and Jeff' walking passed Charlie and Annie trying to be as inconspicuous as possible as they tip their hats at them with devious looks on their faces as Annie and Charlie are watching them exiting with looks of wonderment and dismay on their faces. Annie has now shaken her head in dis-belief.
We are now in the main area of the book store where we see on dank and eerie naked light bulb hanging from the ceiling as we see 'Myrtle the Turtle' walking around trying to get some information about Charlie, {Yasha} as she has now crawled underneat a wooden box.
We are now back in Charlie's flat where we see Annie standing at the sink washing up some dishes as Charlie is sitting at the table reading the newspaper.
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is standing at the sink working on the dishes as she has now cocked her head thinking and a look of dismay on her face as she is calling out to him): "Charlie?"
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he still engulfed in the newspaper with a blank look on his face and only partly listening says): "Hunha?"
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is turning around and looking at Charlie madly and is shouting at him in a mad voice): "Are you listenin?"
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As his now looking up from his newspaper at a star as he is look at her in bewilderment and says in a scared voice): "Humh, oh. yeah, so what else did they say?"
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is standing at the sink with a worried look on her face and is using a worried voice): "Well, from what I could make out, there are some very important records and tapes hidden right here in the store someplace, and they don't care who they kill to get them. Then they said something about a secret passage and an H-bomb, what do you think Charlie?"
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he is sitting at the table holding his newspaper with his leg crossed and smoking a pipe says to Annie in a state of mischief): "I think we should of stayed at the Daredevil Grillé."
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is still wiping up the dishes with a look of wonderment on her face as she asks him in a hurtful voice): "What are we gonna tell Magda though? I think she kinda likes Jim!"
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he is still sitting at the table with the newspaper and his legs crossed as he is looking at Annie with a perplexed look and says in a carrying voice): "Yeah, I think so too, I saw them kissing the other night. And you don't kiss anybody you don't like, unless you like them!"
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is still with the dishes and has a serious look on her face and says to Charlie in a worried voice): "Yeah, she wouldn't believe anything we'd say about him unless we get some real proof!"
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he is still with his newspaper and has a look of carryingness on his face and is using a serious voice): "Yeah, I think you're right."
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is leaning on the sink and lets out a sigh of disgust and then she has a thinking look on her face and is using a thoughfulness voice): "Hey, then they said somehting about the other guy, that he didn't like the idea of the cops coming in. Charlie, give me a hand will ya? Give me a hand!"
Charlie is now sitting at the table in a state of mischief as he is now applauding Annie loudly and has a sheepish look on his face as she has turned around and looked at him disgustingly.
We are now in the lower level cellar where are now once again seeing 'Mutt and Jeff' in aciton. Burglar one is laying on the dirt half resting on his laurels while he is slowly taking spadefuls of dirt. Burglar two is busy digging away with his pick axe. Burglar two has now hit a support beam loudy with his pick axe.
We are now back inside of Charlie's flat where we see Annie washing some dishes while Charlie is wiping them as the stop dead in their tracks when they heard the thumping noise. They are standing there with petrified looks of fear on their faces.
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he is now leaning on the sink holding a dish and the dish rag asks Annie in a really scared voice): "What was that? Did you hear something?"
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (Annie says to Charlie in a terrified voice of panic): "Yeah, I wish I didn't. Why don't you go out and see what it is."
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he has now laughed in a state of fear and has a look of fear on his face as he says to her in a totally scared voice and the fact that his chicken): "Haaaa, haaaa, you go!"
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is still working on the dishes and has a really fearful look on her face as she is saying to Charile in a panicking voice): "But, you're a man!"
We are now hearing more of the shinanigans of 'Mutt and Jeff' as they are now hitting big time the support beams with the spade and pick axe. Annie and Charlie are standing there scared witless as Annie is looking at Charlie in a scared state as Charlie is standing there with his eyes bugging out of his head in total fear.
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he is saying to her in a really scared voice and due to the fact that he is a big fat chicken): "But, you're stronger!"
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is looking at Charlie with a really panicked look on her face as she is yelling at Charlie in a petrified voice): "Somebodys gotta go out there. What are you a man or a mouse?"
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he is standing there still wiping the dishes with his eye bugging out of his head says to her in a fearful voice): "I'm chicken!"
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As Annie is shaking soap suds off of her hands and is drying them on the dish rag and is glarring at Charlie madly and shouting madly): "Well, cluck, cluck. Come on we'll both go. Here, take my hand."
We now see 'Chicken' Charlie holding onto Annie's hand as they are now exiting Charlie's flat and are now going out into the book store to investigate the strange noises that they heard.
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is still holding Chickens hand and she is looking at Charlie with a scared look on her face as she is saying to him in a scared voice): "It, sounded like it came from the cellar."
{CHICKEN} CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he is still holding her hand and has a petrified look of fear on his face says to her in a scared and stammering voice): Yeah, why don't we look over there, {Charlie is now pointing at the main location of the store}, or back there, {he is pointing to his flat}."
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As Annie is looking at Mr. Chicken with a mad look on her face and is using a disgusted voice): "It came from down there!"
{CHICKEN} CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he is standing in the hallway quarters with a horribly scared look on his face and in a scared voice as he is freaking out): "There's more light up here!"
ANNIE to CHICKEN: (As she is shaking her hands in fear and is 'quaking out of her boots' in fear as she is saying to Mr. Chicken in a scared and stammering voice): "I'll, I'll, I'll, get some candles!"
{CHICKEN} CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he is standing there with a worried voice and is 'quaking out of his boots' says to her in a low and stammering voice): "Well, don't go to far!"
Annie has now gone back into Charlie's flat as Mr. Chicken is standing outside with his eyes bugging out of his head in fear and a petrified look of fear on his face.
ANNIE to CHICKEN: (As she has now returned with two candle sticks and candles in fear says to Charlie and scard voice as Charlie has now taken a book of match sticks from his vest pocket): "Here, light 'em!"
{CHICKEN} CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he has now ignited a match stick and is lighting the candles totally shaking in fear): "Well, stop shakin' the candles!"
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As Annie is holding the two candle sticks in fear says to Charlie in a scared and disgusted voice): "Come on, Charlie!, here! Okay, now there's nothing to be afraid of down there!"
{CHICKEN} CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he is looking at her really scared and says in a petrifed and stammering voice): "Well, then you, you, you go ahead, I'll wait here for you!"
ANNIE to CHICKEN: (As she now has him by his hand and is looking at him scared and says to him a scared and worrid voice): "Alone?"
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he is standing there looking at her in horrible fear and says in a horribly scared and stammering voice): "Yeah, yeah, well, I'll, I'll lead the way!"
You guessed it. We are now heading down to the basement quarters to investigate it and you're guess is correct, Annie is leading the way while {Chicken} Charlie is following behind scared witless with his hand on her shoulder. We now see Annie with an ugly look on her face as she is now pushing Chicken on up ahead of her as he has now fallen back and has pushed her in the lead.
Annie has now opened the 'creaking and groaning' old worn out wooden basement door as Charlie and Annie are now walking down the eerie, creaky and groaning stairwell side by side one another as they are holding their candle sticks with really scared looks on their faces.
We are now back on 'Mutt and Jeff', hard at their dirt play as they now heard Annie and Charlie coming down the stairwell.
BURGLAR ONE to BURGLAR TWO: (As they are busy playing in the dirt he says in a state of panic): 'S-S-S-S-S-S-H-H-H-H-H-H!"
We now see 'Mutt and Jeff' running to the wooden cover that is over their entrance way and is looking through it in a state of panic.
BURGLAR ONE to BURGLAR TWO: (As 'Mutt', {One} is looking through a crack in the door he sees Annie and Charlie as he says to his partner in crime): "Hold it, someone's comin' down!"
We are now down in the basment quarters, it is dark, cold, dreary, eerie. There are piles of old furniture, a busted rocking chair with one rocker missing and holes in the cane backing. An end table that has one leg missing. Several support beams are leaning. A busted ladder with a couple rungs missing. Plus it is wall to wall draped in spider webbing.
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As they have now entered this "beautiful room," as the two of them are standing there with petrified looks of fear on their faces as she says to him in a sarcastic but yet scared voice): "Looks like my mothers house in Jersey!"
Annie and Charlie are now slowing investigating the basement quarters as both of them are totally scared at their wits end with fear with their eyes bugging out of their heads from fear and panic. We are now hearing a strange pounding sound, {which are 'Mutt and Jerr'}, but they don't know that.
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is looking at Charlie thoroughly scared out of her gourd with a deep look of panic on her face as Charlie also has a deep look of panic on his face): "Do you believe in ghosts?"
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he is saying to her in a low and scared voice): "I don't trust 'em as far as I can see 'em!"
Annie has now given Charlie a look of dumbfoundedness at his response about ghosts.
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is standing there with a deep look of fear on her face and is using a shakey tone of voice says to Charlie in reference to the strange noises that they are hearing): "Haha, you're the one that doesn't believe in ghosts right? Okay, you go see what it is."
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he is standing there with a really scared look on his face as he is shaking like a leaf and is using a shakey voice): "All right, I believe in them, I believe in them!"
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is now braving the elements and is going to investigate the south-east section of the basement quarters as she says to Chicken Charlie in a scared and shakey voice): "I'll go look over here!"
We now see Charlie with a really scared look his face and shaking in fear walking slowly around the north-west part of the basement quarters looking to see if can locate the strange sound while Annie is in a full scared state is investigating the south-east section for the strange noise and Charlie is investigating his north-west part to see if they can locate the eerie noise.
Charlie has now set his candle stick down on one of the fallen support beams and is slowly and meticulously searching his portion of the basement quarters for the strange noise quaking in his boots with fear. Charlie has now backed into an old busted desk and has jumped out of his skin in fear.
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he is shaking petrified with fear as his eyes are once again popping out of his head in fear says in a shakey stammering voice): "Noth, noth, nothing down here!"
We a got a quick glimpse of 'Mutt and Jeff' as they have for the time being hushed their dirt play details as they are listening against the wall at Charlie and Annie investigating around and are waiting for the 'Green Light' to be able to go back and play.
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he is still in a full blown state of fear and panic as he has opened a closet door and has discovered a dress makers bust says): "Nothin' in here!"
We are now on Annie as she also is totally petrified with fear and panic slowly and meticulously searching her segment of the dreary and spooky basement quarters to locate the eerie noise.
Charlie has now opened the door of the the location of 'Mutt and Jeff' and has jumped back in panic and fear as he now has seen four very eerie eyeballs looking back at him.
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he is so shaken up by fear says to her in a really scared voice): "Nobody in here!"
Poor petrified Charlie has now knocked over a chair and has once again jumped out of his skin with fear as he has now raced over to the fallen support beam and has grabbed his candle stick. Charlie is now meticulously searching underneath the stairwell for the strange noise.
We now find out that "Myrtle the Turtle' has now made her way to the basement quarters and has housed herself underneath an old wooden box. Charlie has now set his candle stick on her box and it is now crawling slowly away.
CHARLIE: (As he is looking underneath the stairwell for the noise thinking that Annie is there says): "Bring, the light closer!"
We now see the tranmittred 'Myrtle the Turtle' walking back to Charlie with his candle stick.
CHARLIE: (In a full fledged state of panic as he is using hand gestures for panic and is shouting loudly from fear thinking that he is talking to Annie, in reality he is talking to "Myrtle the Turtle'): "Closer, closer. I can't see anything, there that's better!"
"Myrtle the Turtle' has now broughten Charlie his candle so close to him that he now has scorched his buns and is yelling, 'Uuuuuh, uuuuuh, uuuuuh, uuuuuh, uuuuuh, uuuuuh, uuuuuh, uuuuuh' out of fear and pain.
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is running over to Charlie in petrified fear after hearing Charlie scream says to him in a fearful voice): "What's the matter, what's the matter!?"
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he is totally out of his skin with fear is saying to her in a really shaken, panicking and stammering voice): "Hunh, hunh, hunh, hunh, hunh, hunh, look, look, look, under, look under."
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she has moved Charlie's candle and has picked up the wooden box and has discovered 'Myrtle the Turtle' as she is saying to the panicking Charlie in a calm voice): "Oh, what are you yellin' for? It's only a turtle!"
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As Charlie has a really scared look on his face and is saying in a shakey voice): "He pulled a knife on me!"
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she has a look of mischief on her face and is saying to Charlie in a calm voice): "Oh, he did not!"
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she now thinks that Charlie has now 'Dove Over The Deep End' as she is saying to him in a sarcastic voice): "What are you making such a fuss for?"
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he is panicked to the 'Enth Degree' and is saying to Annie in a scared and stammering voice): "Wha, wha, wha, da, da, da, box, box, was moving and I, I, I, saw, saw, the light, light comin......!"
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is standing there fully disgusted with Charlie as she is shouting at him of sheer disgust): "Come on Charlie look, it's a nice little turtle!"
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he is saying to her in a voice of hurt and has a really painful look on his face as he is walking away from her out of embarrassment and disgust): "Yeah, well, I hope the two of you will be very happy."
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he has turned back her way and is asking her in a questionable voice as he forgot from fear what they are up to anyways): "Hey, what are we looking for around here anyway?"
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is standing there with her candle stick in her left hand and 'Myrtle the Turtle' in her right hand says to Charlie in a perplexed look on her face): "Well, to be very truthful I really don't know!"
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he has a look of defeat on his face and is saying a slightly mad and defeated voice as he is looking around the basment quarters): "Well, neither do I. But if I find out I will tell ya!"
All the while that Charlie was being petrified to his wits end by 'Myrtle the Turtle' we saw 'Mutt and Jeff' in their secret hide-away plastering their hands over their mouths from cracking up.
We now see Charlie peeking throuhg a peep hole at the home of 'Mutt and Jeff', {our burglar friends} as he has now turned away and has a look of wonderment on his face and 'Jeff' {Two} is now covering up the hole with his paw partly not to be discovered and partly to have some fun with Charlie.
Charlie is now once again peeping in at 'Mutt and Jeff' trying to figure out who in the world they are as 'Jeff' {Two} has now administered to Charlie "The Long Lived and Loved Stooges Gag' THE EYE POKE.
Charlie has now taken down a filthy old rag that was haning from a rusty old nail and has shaken the dust off of it to wipe his face with it causing 'Jeff' to sneeze.
ANNIE: (As she is standing there examining 'Myrtle' and has a devlish look on her face says): "Gazhuntite!"
CHARLIE: (As he has a look of wonderment on his face and is saying in a perplexed voice as he is now looking in the peep hole says): "Thank-you!"
We now hear 'Jeff' {Burglar Two} sneezing once again.
ANNIE: (As she is still making friends with 'Myrtle all the while thinking she is talking to Charlie says once again in a voice of dismay): "Gazhuntite!"
Now we hear the real Charlie let out a big sneezed caused by the dusty old rag.
{JEFF} BURGLAR TWO to CHARLIE: (As he is now joining in the fun of exchanging pleasantries says to Charlie in a full blown state of mischief through the peep hole): "Gashuntite!"
CHARLIE: (Not knowing who he is talking to says in a very pleasant voice): "Thank-you!"
We are now back on Annie and Myrtle as Annie is standing there totally freaked out as she is thinking that Myrtle was doing the talking, saying the 'Thank-You's'.
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (With a look of panic on his face as he has now stuffed the dirty rag into the peep hole and is running away totally scared beyond death as he says to Annie in a petrified voice): "Come on, let's get out of here!"
We now see Annie, Charlie, and Myrtle running up the stairwell fo safety in full blown state of petrified fear.
It is now the next morning after Annie and Charlie's horrifying experience of 'Things That Go Bump In The Night' in the basment quarters. Mr. Holliston in now entering the book store as he is now approaching Magda who is standing at the sales counter.
MR. HOLLISTON to MAGDA: (As he has now walked into the book store with a happy look on his face and in a gleeful voice): "Good morning, Magda!"
MAGDA to MR. HOLLISTON: (As she is standing there giving him a really sweet smile and says to him in a really lovey dovey voice): "Good morning Jim. That was a lovey show we saw last nigh. Thank-you, again."
MR. HOLLISTON to MAGDA: (As he is leaning on the counter and is looking at Magda with a deep look of love and he is saying to her in a loving voice): "My pleasure, being anywhere with you is my pleasure!"
MAGDA to MR. HOLLISTON: (As she is behind the counter and is reading a letter with a look of worry on her face and is using a worried voice): "Oh no, that's dreadful!"
MR. HOLLISTON to MAGDA: (As he is still standing in front of the counter and is looking a Magda with a really carrying look and is supporting a carrying voice says): "What is it?"
MAGDA to MR. HOLLISTON: (As she has a look of panic on her face and is saying in a panicking voice in reference to the letter): "Well, that painter with the new book on Modern Art who was suppose to appear here today, can't make it. Oh, that's a shame. Practically the entire Art Department is exhibiting their work and they were looking forward to his lecture."
MR. HOLLISTON to MAGDA: (As he has now taken the letter from Magda is reading it with a perplexed look on his face as he is saying to her in a really hurtful voice): "Don't worry, I'll think of something!"
We now see Charlie who appears 'Cool As A Cucmber' after his horrifying experience from the basment quarters last night happily attending his dusting chores as he is dusting the eagle in flight. Charlie has now let out a humongous sneeze.
BURGLAR TWO {JEFF} to CHARLIE: (As he has now walked past Charlie carrying his luggage cases of dirt says): "Gazhuntite!"
CHARLIE to JEFF: (As he has now finished his sneeze says in a formal voice): "Thank-you!"
BURGLAR ONE {MUTT}: (As he is also walking out of the book store with his luggage cases of dirt and has an evil look on his face as he is saying to Charlie in a mischievous voice): "You're welcome!"
As Mr. Holliston is walking to the back of the book store we now see Comrade Olga standing in a side book aisle with her arms crossed and a very devious look on her face.
COMRADE OLGA to CHARLIE: (As she is using a really bewitching voice says): "Charlie!"
We now see Charlie approaching Comrade Olga as Mr. Holliston is standing there in the side lines looking at her with a look of fear.
CHARLIE to COMRADE OLGA: (As he is now trotting up to her with a happy strutt holding his hand feather duster as he is saying to her with a look of glee on his face and is using a gleeful voice): "Yeah!?"
COMRADE OLGA to CHARLIE: (As she is standing there with an evil glare on her face as she is looking at him to see if he isn't {Yasha} as she is using a sweet but evil voice): "That book you recommended me about Abstract Art. Oh, I just thought it was so dreamy. I really thought it was just wonderful."
CHARLIE to COMRADE OLGA: (As he is now looking at the floor slightly embarrassed and has a slightly emabarrased voice says): "Well, books are all right but if you ever really want to know alot about Modern Art and all this art stuff, just call me anytime!"
COMRADE OLGA to CHARLIE: (As she is now giving Charlie's cheek a gentle tweek and has a devious look on her face as she is saying to him in a really wicked voice): "I'll remember that. That's just dreamy, bye!"
Comrade Olga has now 'Left The Building' as Charlie has now taken a feather from his duster and has used it to wave good-bye at her as he has a goo-goo look on his face. Mr. Holliston is now approaching Charlie in a really worried manner.
CHARLIE to MR. HOLLISTON. (As Charlie now has a look of love on his face about Comrade Olga, {knowing nothing yet about her being a German Spy}, as he has now returned to his dusting chores and is using a happy but slightly stammering voice): "I, I, I, was just telling the lady there about all this art stuff. You know, anything, anything, anything you wanna know about it like 'Pablo', 'Pitsacado', 'Paul Gagoon,' and a, and a, who's that guy with a name like a chicken? Oh, Pabla, ooooh, ooooh, ooooh, aaaah, aaaah, aaaah, 'Jackson Pulet'."
MR. HOLLISTON to CHARLIE: (As he was slightly laughing at Charlie's translations of some of the famous painters says to him in a serious voice with a mischievous grin on his face): "By, the way, the Art Celebrity who was suppose to lecture here this afternoon can't make it. We don't want to disappoint all those students. Why don't you take over!?"
CHARLIE to MR. HOLLISTON: (As Charlie is standing there holding his feather duster with a look of awe on his face says to Mr. Holliston in a voice of glee): "Why sure, anybody tells ya I don't know anything about art and all that junk is making no mistake."
MR. HOLLISTON to CHARLIE: (As he is saying to Charlie in a serious voice and a serious look on his face says): "Okay!"
CHARLIE to MR. HOLLISTON: (As Charlie now has interupted him and has a look of glee on his face and is using a happy and low voice): "Boy, remember Louis Pasture? But he went right ahead and invented milk!"
MR. HOLLISTON to CHARLIE: (As he is looking at Charlie with a dazed look on his face and is using an affirmative tone of voice says): "Okay, then we'll depend on you."
We now see Mr. Holliston exiting from his conversation with Charlie with a dismayed look on his face as Charlie is now smiling at Mr. Holliston with a prideful look on his face.
CHARLIE to the STUFFED CROW: (As Charlie is now engaged in a conversation with the boid as he is looking at him with a wide eyed determined look as he is asking the crow in a serious voice): "What are you looking at?"
We are now outside at a telephone house where we see Comrade Seed and Comrade Olga with evil looks on their faces as she is standing behind Comrade Seed who has now done his 'Chipmunk' evil look as he is now in the process of dialing the telephone. {as once again the theme from 'Get Smart' is playing in the background}.
We are now on Mr. Big as he is sitting at his desk smoking a two foot long stogie and is now in the process of answering the telephone.
MR. BIG to COMRADE SEED: (As Mr. Big is using a serious voice): "Yes?"
COMRADE SEED to MR. BIG: (As Comrade Seed is using an apologetic voice): "I'm sorry, Mr. Big. but we haven't found anything yet!"
MR. BIG to COMRADE SEED: (As he is sitting at his desk still smoking his two foot long stogie with a really mad look on his face and is shouting at Comrade Seed in a disgusted voice): "Haven't found anything yet? Look you find a way to get him and every one of those nooks away from that book store, and I will look personally!"
COMRADE SEED to MR. BIG: (As he is standing in the telephone house with his 'Chipmunk' look on his face and is saying in a scared voice): "Tomorrow night, there is a party at one of the Fraternity Houses. I will see to it that Nudnick goes, and the store will be empty."
MR. BIG to COMRADE SEED: (As he is sitting there with an evil look on his face and is using a wicked voice says as he is blowing smoke through the telephone receiver): "Good, it takes a man to do a boys job!"
As Comrade Seed was in the process of hanging up the telephone receiver he and Comrade Olga gavie it look of bewilderment as they now see the smoke coming out of it.
IT IS NOW TIME FOR ART CLASS LESSONS COMPLIMENTS OF CHARLIE:
We now see art 'Aficionado'? Charlie standing dressed in a white painters coat with a chef style hat and the art class. {Two of the students are 'Comrade Olga' and 'The Fat Assasin Lady'}. Charlie is now pretending that he is a professional painter painting the portrait of a beautiful lady. His model is a very voluptuous 'savage' dressed in a really, supper skimpy black bikini, with gorgeous knee length blonde hair and is sitting there holding a giant-sized apple in her left hand. All of the students are standing there waiting in wonderment to see the results of Charlie's 'MESSTERPIECE.' Charlie is now walking over to the beautiful blonde scanty clothed bombshell as he is 'trying to act professional' as he has straightened up her chin and the apple. Charlie has now completed his 'MESSTERPIECE.' He is now presenting to the class.
CHARLIE to the ART STUDENTS: (As he is showing his work with a happy look on his face and a gleeful voice): "Voila!" {Charlie's picture is a solid black background with two huge white circles to represent a womans frontal anatomy}.
We now see the art students applauding Charlie's 'MESSTERPIECE' in approval shouts loudly------"Yeah!". The model of the picture has given it a look of disgust.
CHARLIE to the ART STUDENTS: (As he is using a professional voice and has a look of glee on his face as he is trying to be a 'PROFESSIONAL TEACHER OF THE FINER ARTS'): "Now, that is what we call simple art, I guess you're all simple enough to understand that. On the other hand Abstract Art should be a true picture of the inner sould and it's emotions. We can't confined by conventional attitudes and moves. What we seek is freedom of expression, you understand?"
Charlie is now looking at the art students with a quizzical look on his face to see if they grasped onto his philosophical-ness about Abstract Art.
ART STUDENTS to CHARLIE: (As they are standing there with looks of dumbfoundedness on their faces as they are saying to Charlie in bewildered voices): "Right, yeah, right!"
CHARLIE to the ART STUDENTS: (As Charlie now has a look of mischief on his face and is using a mischievous tone of voice): "Well, explain it to me."
Charlie and the class of art students are now laughing with on another about his previous statement.
CHARLIE to the ART STUDENTS: (As he is looking at them with a happy look on his face and is using a happy voice says): "All right, now I will look at your exhibits."
We now see Charlie in the process of un-covering one of the exhibits as he is for the moment being slightly distracted as he now has a really gleeful look on his face as the beautiful blonde model, {for his painting} has now walked up to the head of the class.
CHARLIE to the ART STUDENTS: (As the students are now standing there in a serious but slightly mad manner): "Oh, well let's see what this little tid-bit is right here. Hey, beautiful."
1: "AFTERNOON OF A FAWN:" (Best to my ability translation}: "A black marble sculpture of five arms and hands bent in all directions like the shape of and old fashioned wheel spoke on an old automobile wheel as the top two hands and holding each other and the other three are bent at the wrists as two are pointing downwards and the third one is pointing upwards."
CHARLIE to the ART STUDENTS: (As Charlie and the students have now applauded the first artwork as Charlie has a gleeful look on his face): "Let's see what we have here, friends?"
CHARLIE IS NOW REVELING THE SECOND ARTWORK:
2: "MORNING AFTER THE AFTERNOON OF A FAWN:" {Again bare with me, the best of ability in description}: "In the upper left corner of the canvas is a picture of a demented looking court gesture laying sideways. Upper right corner a picture of demented looking baker mixing a cake. The top centre of the picture looks like a rack with a bunch of bakers utensils. Dead centre looks like a ladies white pocketbook and a rat trap. Bottom Right looks like some sausages and the bottom left some playing dice."
CHARLIE to the ART STUDENTS: (As he has a look of glee on his face and is using a happy voice as he is now un-covering another artwork): "This must be a piece of statuary."
CHARLIE IS NOW REVELING THE THIRD ARTWORK:
3: "SPLITTING HEADACHE:" "This is a statue of a man dressed in a suit and there is only half of the head revealed as we see hanging from the inside of the head a 500 count jar of aspirin tablets."
CHARLIE to the ART STUDENTS: (With a look of mischief on his face and is using a mischievous voice in reference to the artwork): "This guy could use half an aspirin."
CHARLIE IS NOW REVELING THE FOURTH ARTWORK:
CHARLIE to the ART STUDENTS: (As he has a mischievous look on his face and is using a mischievous voice): "And, over here?"
CHARLIE to the FAT ASSASIN LADY: (As he is using a very kind and friendly voice as he is giving her a very nice smile as he is getting ready to show her artwork): "Oh, how do you do, is this yours?"
FAT ASSASIN LADY to CHARLIE: (As she is standing there proudly by her artwork and has a happy smile on her face and says to Charlie in a giggly voice): "Hunh, hum!"
CHARLIE to the FAT ASSASIN LADY: (As he is looking at her with a very kind look on his face and in a friendly voice): "Oh, very nice."
CHARLIE IS NOW REVELING THE FAT ASSASIN LADY'S EXHIBIT NUMBER FIVE:
5: "YOU AND YOU SUICIDE ATTEMPTS, LOOK AT THESE GAS BILLS:" {Again, best of my ability}: "It is an art canvas that is splattered with an array of different colours of paints, several months of home delivery gas bills glued to it and the focal pointe of it is a gas billings metre."
CHARLIE to the ART STUDENTS: (As he is walking up to another art exhibit and has now un-covered it says with a mischievous look and a mischievous voice): "Oh, something for the athlete."
CHARLIE IS NOW REVELING ARTWORK NUMBER SIX:
6: "TEMPER-TEMPER:" "It is a collection of five golfing rods thoroughly bent out of shape and glued together."
CHARLIE to the ART STUDENTS: (As he has now given that display a look of dismay and says politely): "Good."
CHARLIE to COMRADE OLGA: (As he has noticed her has a happy look on his face and is saying gleefully): "Oh, Olga, you got something here?"
COMRADE OLGA to CHARLIE: (As she is standing there in a cockie disposition says to Charlie in a cockie voice laced with mischief): "Course, I'm an art student too."
CHARLIE IS NOW REVELING HER ARTWORK NUMBER SEVEN:
7: "SEVENTY DOLLARS FOR A MANICURE - YOU MUST BE NUTS:" {Best of my ability}: "It is a statue of a lady at a Beauty Parlour sitting there getting her nails done and has a shocked look on her face now that she has received the payment bill."
CHARLIE to COMRADE OLGA: (As he is looking at her with a happy look on his face and is using a gleeful voice): "Very cleaver."
COMRADE OLGA to CHARLIE: (As she is standing there in total pride about her artwork says to Charlie in a kind voice): "You're sweet. Listen, I hope you can make it to the 'Beatnik Party' tomorrow night at the Frat House, cuz it should be a ball."
CHARLIE to COMRADE OLGA: (As he is now looking around at the other art students in glee says to her in a happy voice): "Oh sure, we'll all be there, hunh?"
We now see the art students standing there nodding their heads in agreement as they are saying in unison: "Yeah, sure!"
COMRADE OLGA to CHARLIE: (As she is standing there giving Charlie a look like a whipped puppy says to him in a loving voice): "And, I'll be looking forward to dancing with you."
Comrade Olga has now given Charlie a quick, light slug on his cheek as she has now given the Fat Assasin Lady a quick, evil grin. She is now exiting the art class. Charlie has now wiggled his finger in good-bye to Comrade Olga with a big, happy grin on his face. The Fat Assasin Lady has now waved her fingers at Charlie gleefully as Charlie has now turned his back on her and has a disgusted look on his face.
CHARLIE to THE ART STUDENTS: (As he is standing there with a look of disgust on his face and says in a serious voice): "Class, dissmissed!"
We now see Charlie and the students exiting.
THIS ENDS OUR ART STUDIES WITH CHARLIE {AND MAY IS SAY, I GIVE HIM AN A GRADE}:
We are now back in Charlie's flat and it is evening as we see Annie and Charlie sitting at the table chowing down on popping corn as the are now watching a stupid western movie on the television set.
ANNIE to CHARLIE; (As she taps Charlie on his hand with a smile on her face says to Charlie in a happy voice): "Humhn, my favourite T.V. commercial."
T.V. COMMERCIAL: "Friends, tonight's great comedy was brought to you tonight by 'Heather Acres Cemetery'. A home away from home. Music pipped in twenty-four hours a day."
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As they are chowing down their popping corn he has a look of mischief on his face and says in a happy voice): "They make it sound so good, if you're alive, it makes you feel like you're missing something."
T. V. ANNOUNCER: (In a dull monotone style of a voice): "And, now it's time for your favourite western, "SHOOTIN' SAM" here he comes shooting his way into your hearts. 'Shootin' Sam and his Horse Percy'."
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he is now totally excited about this feature says to her in a gleeful voice): "Boy, I love those cowboy movies, they, they make a person think."
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she has a pure devilsh look on her face as she says to Charlie in a mischievous voice): "And, for you, that's a novelty."
We are now outside of the book store where we see Comrade Seed walking up in a really wicked manner. As he has now ducked for cover in an alley way next to the store. He has now looking in every direction to make sure that the coast is cleas as he is now taking his pass key and is entering the book store.
Comrade Seed has now entered the book store. He has snuck around looking for clues if Charlie is the missing cosmonaut Yasha Nudnick. Comrade Seed has now ducked for cover behind the main sales counter. He has now opened one of the side counter doors and is rifling through some papers looking for clues. He has now gone through the second side drawer and rifled through some more papers, no clues yet. The cash register drawer was empty and opened and he looked under the money box and has accidentally closed it and is now pressing the 'NO SALES' button to open it back up again. A bell has now sounded on the cash register and he has now flinched out of fear as he is looking around the store to see if anyone is coming.
We are now on a painting of Napoleon where the eyes have been removed to be used as a spy picture as we now see someone looking through the picture. We now see one of the book shelves revolve as it was set up as a secret passageway and we see entering through the book shelf a Foreign Agent {NAME: NICK ADAMS}. He has now closed the book shelf and has now dropped a book on the floor.
Comrade Seed has now come upon the Foreign Agent as the Foreign Agent has not noticed Comrade Seed who has now ducked for cover behind a book shelf. The Foreign Agent has now snuck behind another book shelf.
We are now back in Charlie's flat as he and Annie are still watching the wonderful 'Western Flick', "Shootin' Sam and his Horse Percy'.
CHARLIE to the MOVIE: (As Charlie is now totally wrapped up in the flick says in a worried voice): "Come on fast. Shoot low Sam, they're riding a Shetland Pony."
All the while that Charlie was sitting there making his editorial comments to the flick Annie was sitting there totally bored out of her gourd.
We are now back in the book store where we see the Foreign Agent being shot at by Comrade Seed with a .38 magum snub nosed gat. The Foreign Agent has now shot back at Comrade Seed with a .44 magnum gat.
We are now back in Charlie's flat where we see poor Annie about to fall asleep out of boredom while Charlie is deely envolved with the flick as he is using his finger to represent gats and is jumping up and down in his chair like he is riding a horse.
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As Charlie has now snapped his fingers in madness as he has a mad look on his face and a mad voice as the television in now on the fritz): "Oh, darn it, there goes the picture!"
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she has a bored look on her face and is using a bored voice as she is turning her fingers like turning the "ON AND OFF' knob on the television.
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he has a look of glee on his face and is using a gleeful voice): "Oh, yeah!"
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she has a serious look on her face and is using gestures to represent turning the television knob): "Go, like this!"
Charlie is now in a state of mischief as he is making gestures like turning on and the television knob.
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she has a look of madness on her face and is using a mad voice as she has now slapped Charlie on his arm): "The set, stupid"
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he has look of dumbness on his face and is using a dumb sounding voice as he is getting up and trying to fix the television set): "Oh, oh!"
Charlie is now fiddling with the television knob and banging on the top of the television set oblivious to the 'SHOOT OUT AT OKAY CORRALL' that is taking place in the book store, betwixt Comrade Seed and the Foreign Agent. {I only have on thing to say here, how in the world were they able to fill their cylinders with cartridges and clips so fast. They were six round cylinders and a eight round clip on both gats and they have over rode that big time. Plus they are poor shots, by now at pointe blank ranger like they were they should have gotten one another by now}.
We are now back in Charlie's flat where we see both Annie and Charlie with looks of wonderment on their faces as they are hearing gat shots and the television is busted. The 'SHOOT OUT AT OKAY CORRALL' is now in full swing as Charlie and Annie are not catching onto it yet.
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is getting a small clue about the shoot out that is taking place as she has a look of worry on her face and is using a worried voice): "Turn that thing clear off."
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As Charlie is standing there glarring at dead television set says to Annie in a mad voice): "Sure, sure."
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is sitting there in a dazed state as she is saying in a questionable voice): "I don't think you are, sound doesn't seem to go off!"
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As Charlie is standing there in a dazed state as he has a look of bewilderment on his face says to Annie as he is pulling the plug on the television set out from the wall): "Look, I'll show you. I'll pull the plug out. You see there it is, it's a......"
We now see Charlie totally petrified out of his mind as he is standing there with his eyes bugging out of his head in fear as he is holding the television plug in his hand and the shooting is still in progress. We now see Annie walking up to Charlie in a horrible state of fear as she is now holding onto Charlie for protection as they are wondering what in the world is going on.
Finally the 'SHOOT OUT AT OKAY CORRALL' has ended. The two bad marksmen have finished their bought as Comrade Seed has finally shot the Foreign Agent and has winged him in his left shoulder as the Foreign Agent has now gone back through the revolving book case for cover as Comrade Seed is standing in front of it with an evil and wicked grin of happiness about his victory.
Charlie and Annie have now finally realized that the shooting was taking place in the book store as they are quietly going out in pure petrification.
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As the two of them have really freaked out looks on their fiaces as they are sneaking out into the book store): "The night light is out."
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he is holding her hand and has a scared look on his face as he says in a really scared voice): "Yeah, yeah, good, maybe no one will see us."
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is pointing a finger at him as they are sneaking out into the book store in fear): "Listen, yo go down that aisle and I'll go down this aisle and if anybody is here we'll catch him, okay?"
All the while that Annie was dishing out instructions Charlie was saying, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, in total fear.
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she has turned around and has given Charlie a mean look as she is shoving him away and says in a mad voice): "Will you go down that aisle?"
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he is looking at her with fear as he is saying to her in a low and fearful voice): "All right, all right!"
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is prowling around the store and is now really scared as Charlie has now gone says to him in a scared voice): "Charlie give me your hand. Come on, will ya quit stalling, give me your hand!"
We now see the gloved hand of Comrade Seed now holding onto Annie's hand.
ANNIE to CHARLIE?: (As she is holding onto a hand as she thinks it't Charlie's not knowing it is the gloved hand of Comrade Seed and is talking to whom she think's is Charlie but in reality is Comrade Seed): "Yeah, that's better. Boy sometimes I wonder if you got a brain in your head. Now look, the first thing we gotta do is find out what happened to the light. We gotta take a good look around somebody may still be here!"
We now hear Charlie in the distance saying, "Annie, Annie!"
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is realizing that she is not holding Charlie's hand is standing there with a horrible look of fear on her face as she is saying in a stammering voice): "Wo, wo, wo, would you say that again?"
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he is shouting to her in a state of fear): "Annie, come on back I don't wanny be in here alone!"
We now see Annie slowly looking to her left as she is standing there with her mouth agait as her eyes a bugging out of her head in horrible fear as she has now discovered that she is holding hands with a spy instead of Charlie.
ANNIE: (As she is standing freaked out of her wits end as she is screaming in a really scared and stammering voice): "A va, a va, a va, a av, ma ma!"
Charlie has now found the light switch and has turned it on as he is standing there with a puzzled look on his face.
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he has now raised his hands in dismay as he has a look of madness on his face and is saying in a mad tone of voice): "Well, you see somebody was fooling around with the light switch."
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is standing there looking at Charlie with a really fearful look on her face as she is saying to Charlie in a stammering and really freaked out voice): "Yeah, yeah, but there was this hand, this hand with the glove, and the glove was holding my hand. I thought it was you!"
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As Charlie was using hand gestures to support mischief and a mischievous voice and a look of mischief on his face states): "This is no time for romance. Come on let's look and see what's goin' on around here!"
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is putting her hands on Chalie's arms and is looking at him with a worried look on her face and asks him in a worried voice): "Do we have too?"
We now see Charlie looking away from Annie with a really disgusted look on his face as he is waving her arms and is looking at him in total fright.
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is looking at him with a hurtful and scared look on her face as she is saying in a scared and slightly disgusted voice): "All right, all right!"
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he now is looking at her in a really mad state as he is shouting at her in a disgusted voice): "Come on!"
We now see Charlie and Annie investigating the store as Charlie is leading the way with a scared and determined look on his face as Annie is following behind scared beyond no end holding onto the back of Charlie's suit vest.
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is standing there looking at Charlie in a state of disgust and with a mad look on her face): "I don't know what we're doin' in this crazy store anyways!"
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he is standing there with one arm on a support beam and the other one with his hand on his waist as he is looking at Annie with a disgusted look on his face as he says to her in a mad voice): "How can you say a thing like that. I think it was nice of Magda to give us a job."
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is standing there looking at Charlie with a disgusted look on her face and says in a sarcastic voice): "Yeah, some swell job, like reharsin' to get murdered!"
Annie and Charlie are now starring at a switch that Charlie has pushed with looks of question on their faces.
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is looking at the push box with a dazed look as with Charlie asks Charlie in a quizzical voice): "What's that?"
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As has now read the button as he is looking at her with a look of wonderment on his face as he says in a sarcastic voice): It's a button, says don't touch!"
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is looking at Charlie with a disgusted look on her face as she is shouting at Charlie madly): "Well, don't touch it!"
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As Charlie is now standing there looking at the button in a state of curiosity as he says to her in a curious voice): "What do you mean, don't touch it!?"
We now see curious Charlie pushing the button as it has now opened up a shoot that sent Annie flying down to the basement quarters for the first time.
We now see Charlie standing there with a perplexed look on his face as he is rubbing his ears from the buzz it gave wondering what the button did as we see Annie approaching Charlie thoroughly disgusted and staggering in pain with a pail over head. Annie is now staggering over to Charlie dazed out with the pail on her head.
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is still has the pail on her head and is saying to Charli in a muffled mad voice): "Unh, unh, unh, hunh, hunh, hunh!"
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he is looking at the button with a dazed look on his face as he is shouting at her in a mad voice): "Speak up, will ya Annie? I can't understand you half the time."
We now see Annie standing back on the secret shoot as Charlie is now playing with the button still courious to know what it does as he is once again sending Annie to the basment quarters.
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he is starring at the button in a full blown state of curiosity as he says to Annie as he is pushing it for the second time): "Gee, this button must be for something?"
Annie is now once again coming up from the basment quarters totally gazzed out with the pail on her head for the second as she in moaning from pain and dazement.
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As Charlie has now noticed the pail on her head and is looking at her with mischievous as he is saying to her mischievously): "Hey, Annie, is that the outfit you're gonna wear to the 'Beatnik Party', I'm takin' you too?"
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is holding the pail up off of her head and is saying to Charlie with a gazzed look on her face and in a gazzed vocie): "Oh sure, sure. Look, I wanna show you something. You stand over here, stand right there. All right don't move!"
Charlie is now standing where Annie has told him to stand which she thinks is over the secret shoot but he is in a spot next to the shoot as he is looking at her with a look of dismay on his face as Annie still has the pail over her head as she is now pushing the button and thinks she is ejecting Charlie down to the basement quarters. In reality she has miss centred Charlie and has sent herself flying to the basement quarters for the third time. As we hear the sounds of bells and horms going off and Charlie has now shrugged his shoulders in a state of whatever as he is now walking slowly away in wonderment.
We are now on the third take of Annie staggering up from the basement quarter totally gazzed right out as she is moaning in pain, 'unhn, unhn, unhn, hunha, hunha, hunha, still wearing her pail hat.
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is now thoroughly disgusted with the whole matter as she is tossing the pail to the floor totally disgusted is shouting to Charlie madly): "All right, all right, all right. Enough's, enough, enough!"
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As Charlie is standing there looking at her with a mad look on his face and is shouting at her in a disgusted voice): "Very funny. Come on quit kiddin' around, we got work to do!"
We now see Annie and Charlie walking through the book store at a slow and scared state as Charlie and Annie are now looking in all directions to see if they can find any suspicious evidence of what is going on.
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he is standing there with a look of brilliance on his face as he has now snapped his fingers and says to her in a brilliant sounding voice): "Hey, I got an idea!?"
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As Annie is standing there looking at Charlie with a sarcastic look on her face as she is saying in a sarcastic voice): "Beginners luck!"
We now see Charlie leaning on a book shelf which happens to be the secret revloving one as he is now falling into a hidden un-known place as Annie is standing there with her mouth agait and a look of scaredness on her face as she is watching Charlie falling into the secret passageway.
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is screaming at the top of her lungs in a state of horrified panic as she has now noticed him missing): "C-H-A-R-L-I-E!"
We now hear Carrousel Horse Music playing as we now see Annie playing revolving doors with the swinging book case.
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he has now made a quick stop in the main area of the book store then he is now back in the revolving book shelf with a horrified look of panic on his face as he is shouting from fear): "A-N-N-I-E?"
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is now has made a quick stop in the main area of the store and then is now back revolving through the book shelf): "C-H-A-R-L-I-E!"
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he has now made a quick pass through the main area of the book store in a state of fear and panic shouts): "A-N-N-I-E, where are you?"
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is now getting off of her carrousel horse as she is standing there in front of the revolving book case as she is waving her arms and has a look of panic on her face and is using a panicking voice): "Char, Charlie you, you, stand still!"
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As Charlie has now caught up with Annie as he has a scared look on his face and is using a panicking voice is shouting at her): "Will you? Hey, come on, we gotta find out what's goin' on in there."
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is standing there holding her hands together as she is looking at Charlie in a really petrified state of fear and is using a scared and stammering voice): "I'd, I'd, I'd, rather not!"
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he is looking at her with a dazed look and is using a mad voice as he has his hands on his waist in madness): "Will I tell you something wrong?"
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is standing there with a dismayed look on her face and is saying to him in a freaked out voice): "Yes."
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As Charlie is now taking hold of her hand as they are now walking around the store in total petrified state): "Come on!"
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she has now noticed the 'Dead Piece Of Meat' Foreign Agent as she is standing there with her mouth agait, her eyes bugging out of her head and is using a scared and stammering voice as she is pointing at him): "Aaaaah, aaaaah, aaaaah, aaaaah, aaaaah, aaaaah, a-va, a-va, a-va, a-va, a-va, a-va!"
We now see Charlie and Annie running away screaming, haaaaah, haaaaah, haaaaah, haaaaah, haaaaah, haaaaah, haaaaah, haaaaah, haaaaah' in horrible fear as they have now noticed the dead Foreign Agent.
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As they are now running away in a horrible state of fear and panic as she is screaming): "Charlie, call!"
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he is running out in a state of freaked outness as he is shouting at the top of his lungs): "H-E-Y!"
We now got a quick glimpse of a spy detection radio that has now picked up on Annie and Charlie and what they were saying.
It is now the following morning after Charlie and Annie's horrible bout with finding the dead 'Foreign Agent,' in the store as we see Charlie once again putting books away as he is yawning from a lack of sleep.
Here we go again another round with our two friends, 'Mutt and Jeff', {our burglar friends} as they are now on round six of their dirt carrying out project as they are now passing Charlie.
{JEFF} BURGLAR TWO to CHARLIE: (As he is standing there holding his luggage cases of dirt and is looking at Charlie with a mischievous look on his face states): "Say, aaaah, that was quiet a night we had last night wasn't it?"
CHARLIE to 'JEFF': (As Charlie is standing there in front of his book cart and is yawning and stretching from a lack of sleep says to 'Jeff' in a sleepy voice): "Yeah, sure was!"
We now see Charlie standing there holding a book as he has now slightly woken up and has a look of wonder on his face about how in the world that, that guy 'Jeff' knew what was going on last night as the two burglars are now exiting the store.
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is now approaching Charlie with a look of dismay on her face and is saying to him in a serious and scared voice): "Hey, Charlie, The Chief Of Police is here and he wants to see ya!"
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As Charlie is standing there holding his book and is in a full blown state of mischief says): "You mean, old skin head?"
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is standing there looking at Charlie with a concerned look on her face as she is pointing a finger at Charlie in madness and is using a carrying voice): "Yeah, and you better be careful of what you say, because we're in enough trouble as it is!"
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As Charlie is standing there looking at her with a worried look on his face and saying to her in a mad and questionable voice): "Why, we didn't do nothin'!"
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is standing there waving her hands in madness as she has a look of worry on her face and is saying to him in a worried voice): "Yeah, but he doesn't seem to be too sure we didn't. Now watch what you say, will ya, don't forget, we're witnesses in a murder case. Come on, the Chief is waiting."
We now see Annie taking hold of Charlie's hand as they are now walking up to the front of the store in worried states as they are now approaching the Chief Of Police.
We now see a gathering of students enjoying a lecture by a resident from the country of India where we see on a table as sign that reads as follows:
Read: COWBOYS IN INDIA
By: RAMMOO JAWAHARLHARL
GET YOUR COPY TODAY
FREE AUTOGRAPHING BY AUTHOR
RAMMOO to FEMALE STUDENT {ONE}: (As he is handing her an autographed copy of his book 'COWBOYS IN INDIA' with a serious look on his face and is saying in a really polite voice): "Thank-you, very much!"
FEMALE STUDENT {TWO} to RAMMOO: (As she is looking at him with a serious look and is saying to him in a quizzical voice): "I'm so anxious to read about your life as a cowboy, Mr. Rammoo."
FEMALE STUDENT {THREE) to MR. RAMMOO: (As she is standing there with a serious look on he face and is asking him in a questionable voice): "I never knew they had cattle ranches in India?"
MR. RAMMOO to THE STUDENTS: (As he is standing there with a look seriousness on his face and is using a serious voice): "Well, we do not have cattle ranches in India. We do not raise cattle, we raise elephants, we have elephant ranches and this is very difficult at round-up time, because we do not have horses either."
THIRE FEMALE STUDENT to MR. RAMMOO: (As she is standing there with a quizzical look on her and is asking in a questionable voice): "Well, what do you ride?"
MR. RAMMOO to THIRD FEMALE STUDENT: (As he has a devilsh look on his face and is using a mischievous voice): "We ride cobras."
THIRD FEMALE STUDENT to MR. RAMMOO: (As she is slightly lauging and is using a laughing voice): "Haaaa, haaaa, haaaa, haaaa, how doe you ride a cobra?"
MR. RAMMOO to THIRD FEMALE STUDENT: (As he has a serious look on his face and is responding in a mischievous voice): "We keep the stirrups very short."
MALE STUDENT to MR. RAMMOO: (As he is supporting a serious look and using a questionable voice): "Aaaaah, Mr. Rammoo, why do you have ranches in India? As I understand it, Indians are now allowed to eat meat!"
MR. RAMMOO to MALE STUDENT: (As he is responding in a serious manner): "That is not true. The only animals we're not allowed to eat are pigs!"
MALE STUDENT to MR. RAMMOO: (As he is asking him in a questionable state): "And, why is that?"
MR. RAMMOO to MALE STUDENT: (As Mr. Rammoo has a look of mischief on his face and using a mischievous voice): "They are not Kosher."
MALE STUDENT to MR. RAMMOO: (As he is asking him in a serious and questionable voice): "Do you carry a gun?"
MR. RAMMOO to MALE STUDENT: (As he has a serious look on his face and is saying in a mischievous voice): "Only, when I am armed. I am known as the fastest drawer in the East. Would you like to see a demonstration of my quick draw?"
STUDENTS to MR. RAMMOO: (As they are now standing there with looks of glee on their faces and are giving him a big round of applause saying): "Ooooh, ooooh, ooooh, ooooh, aaaah, aaaah, aaaah, aaaah, yes, yes, yes, yes!"
MR. RAMMOO to THE STUDENTS: (As he is now looking at his wrist watch and them stomps his foot says serious): "I show you, go!"
Mr. Rammoo is now un-buttoning the thirty buttons on his suit jacket and is removing a gat from his right trousers pocket.
We are now back up in the front main area of the store where we see Magda standing behind the main sales counter with a worried look on her face as the Updyke Chief Of Police is standing there with a serious look on his face and Charlie and Annie are standing there with worried looks on their faces.
UPDYKE CHIEF OF POLICE to CHARLIE: (As he is asking Charlie in a serious and questionable voice): "I know you gave your report to the Officers last night, but I want to go over it again with you. Now tell me what happened here last night?"
ANNIE to the UPDYKE CHIEF OF POLICE: (As she is cutting in and has a scared look on her face and is explaining in a serious voice): "Aaaaah, well like I told you, we searched all over the store. And then Charlie found the leaver for the trap door!"
CHARLIE to the UPDYKE CHIEF OF POLICE: (As Charlie is waving his hand in a come on way and is saying to him is a scared voice): "Yeah, come on, I'll show ya."
UPDYKE CHIEF OF POLICE to CHARLIE: (As we see see and Charlie going to the leaver for the trap door as he is saying to Charlie in a serious voice): "Do that!"
We now see Annie, Charlie, and the Police Chief walking over to the leaver and the trap door.
We are now back on the book lecture class where Mr. Rammoo has now finished un buttoning his jacket and has removed from his pocket a long nosed .22 six shot hand gat and is saying. "Boomb.!" We now see the students standing there laughing as he is standing there with a mischievous smirk on his face as he is now in the process of buttoning up his jacket.
We are now at the scene of the secret button and the trap door. As Charlie and Annie are standing there with looks of dismay on their faces as the Chief Of Police is standing there making notes on his pad with a quizzical look on his face.
UPDYKE CHIEF OF POLICE to CHARLIE: (As he is looking around the the store with a look of dismay on his face he happens to be standing on the spot of the trap door says to Charlie and Annie in a questionable voice): "I don't see any trap door, show me!"
CHARLIE to the UPDYKE CHIEF OF POLICE: (As Charlie is standing there still holding his book with a serious look on his face and is now pushing the button says to him in a serious voice): "All right, I'll show you."
Charlie is now pushing the button as he is now sending the Chief Of Police flying down into the basement quarters, as we once again here bells and whistles sounding off.
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As the two of them are standing there looking at the trap door with looks of wonderment and she is saying in a mischievous voice): "Well, I guess you showed him!"
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he is standing there with a look of mischief as he is nodding his head in agreement and is using a mischievous voice): Yeah, I guess I did. Hey, wonder if he got a bucket on his head?"
Annie has now given Charlie a look of perplexness. We now see the Chief Of Police coming up the basment quarters staggering in pain and hurt as he is rubbing dirt off his uniform and is removing his cap and rubbing his head in pain.
ANNIE to the UPDYKE CHIEF OF POLICE: (As she is standing there with a look of mischief on her face and mischief in her voice): "Haaaa, there you are Chief, it's nothing serious!"
UPDYKE CHIEF OF POLICE to ANNIE: (With a mad look on his face and is shouting at her madly in a stammering voice): "Nothing, nothing, nothing, nothing, serious!"
CHARLIE to THE UPDYKE CHIEF OF POLICE: (As Charlie is now in a full blown state of mischief says): "She, just said that!"
UPDYKE CHIEF OF POLICE to CHARLIE: (As he is pointing a finger at Charlie in a serious state of madness as he is madly shouting at Charlie): You're gonna go to jail buster. That's how serious it is."
CHARLIE to the UPDYKE CHIEF OF POLICE: (As Charlie has a look of worry and is asking him in a worried voice): "Oh, yeah, on what charge?"
UPDYKE CHIEF OF POLICE to CHARLIE: (As he has a really mad look on his face as he is shouting to Charlie madly as he is counting on his fingers as he is naming off the different charges): 1: "Obstructing Justice." 2: "Creating A Disturbance." 3: "Interfering With An Officer Of The Law With Intent To Do Bodily Harm!" "And, and, and, and, and, I'll think of a few more!"
CHARLIE to the UPDYKE CHIEF OF POLICE: (As Charlie is standing there looking at him with a hurtful look as he is saying to the 'Bald Headed Chief Of Police,' in a mischievous voice): "Yeah, go ahead and tear your hair out!"
As Charlie was standing there having his tit-for-tat with the Chief Of Police we saw Annie standing there with a mad look on her face. Mr. Holliston and Magda are now approaching the three of them.
MR. HOLLISTON to the UPDYKE CHIEF OF POLICE: (As he is now coming up to the Police Chief with a serious look and using a serious voice in Charlie's defense): "Just wait a minute Chief. Perhaps I can clarify what's been going on around here!"
MR. HOLLISTON to MAGDA: (As he has a serious looking and using a serious voice): "Is there a quit spot where we can all talk?"
MAGDA to MR. HOLLISTON: (As she has a look of dismay on her face and a serious voice): "Yes, Charlie's room."
CHARLIE to EVERYBODY: (In a full blown state of mischief): "Well, all right, but it's a mess!"
We now see Charlie, Annie, Magda, Mr. Holliston and the Chief Of Police going into Charlie's room to rap.
We are now once again on the students at the book lecture as Mr. Rammoo has now completed buttoning his jacket as the students are looking at him with dazed looks on their faces.
MR. RAMMOO to the STUDENTS: (As he has now stomped his foot and is looking at his wrist watch and says in reference to his shooting): "Beat my old record by two minutes, twenty-three seconds!"
We now see the students applauding him in agreement to his accomplishments.
THIRD FEMALE STUDENT to MR. RAMMOO: (As she is standing there in seriousness and is asking him about the red mark on his face about the religious significance about it): "Mr. Rammoo, if I may ask you a personal question. What does that little red mark represent?"
MR. RAMMOO to the THIRD FEMALE STUDENT: (As he is looking at her in a dazed state and is saying in a questionable voice): "What little red mark?"
THIRD FEMALE STUDENT to MR. RAMMOO: (With a puzzled look on her face and in a questionable voice): "The little red mark on your forehead?"
MR. RAMMOO to the THIRD FEMALE STUDENT: (As he is now touching his forehead as he is saying to her and the other students): "Oh, my goodness, I'm bleeding."
MR. HOLLISTON to the UPDYKE CHIEF OF POLICE: (As he is standing in Charlie's flat and is showing him his badge is saying in a serious voice): "These are my credentials, Chief. You can see I work for our Government."
Right here we now see Magda, Charlie, and Annie standing there looking at Mr. Holliston and the Police Chief with worried looks on their faces.
UPDYKE CHIEF OF POLICE to MR. HOLLISTON: (With a worried look on his face and a serious voice says): "Well, things seem to be in order, now what's going on around here?"
MR. HOLLISTON to the UPDYKE CHIEF OF POLICE: (As he has a worried look on his face as he is explaining to the Chief Of Police in a worried voice): "Well, to make it brief, Secret Agents from Klabiashsa think that Charlie here is the missing cosmonaut Yasha Nudnick."
CHARLIE to MR. HOLLISTON: (As Charlie has a bewildered look on his face as he is pointing at himself and says in a questionable voice): "Me?"
MR. HOLLISTON to CHARLIE: (As he is looking at Charlie with a carrying voice and is saying in a carrying voice): "Yes, and by a strange coincidence you look exactly like Nudnick."
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As Annie is standing there with her mouth agait and a hurtful look on her face as she is looking at a couple of photoshots of Nudnick and is saying to Charlie in a surprised voice): "Hey, Charlie, you really do look like him."
MR. HOLLISTON to the UPDYKE CHIEF OF POLICE: (As he is explaining everything in a professional manner): "There's a rumour that Nudnick might appear at the Space Convention, so seeing Charlie here made them feel they were on the right track. Now, the late Professor Lerowski, one of my men has been guarding you through the secrets passageways, but he was detected and murdered last night."
Right here the Chief Of Police was trying to get in a word as he has been interupted by Annie.
ANNIE to MR. HOLLISTON: (As she is still holding the photoshots with a worried look and using a worried voice): "Yeah, we saw, all killed and everything!"
CHARLIE to MR. HOLLISTON: (As Charlie is now in a full blown state of mischief says in reference to Professor Lerowski): Yeah, he didn't seem too happy about it."
MR. HOLLISTON to CHARLIE: (As he is explaining to Charlie along with everyone else in a serious state): "Well, those Agents from Klabiasha want those tapes and records at all cost. They think you might expose them at the Convention, so time is running short."
CHARLIE to MR. HOLLISTON: (As Charlie is standing there worried and using a questionable voice): "But, I'm not Yasha Nudnick!"
MR. HOLLISTON to CHARLIE: (As he looking at Charlie with a carrying look and using a carrying voice): "Well, our Government Agents know that, we've known it all along. But the K. E. B. {'Klabiasha Espionage Bureau'}, think's you are, so Charlie just carry on as usual."
Take two on the Updyke Chief Of Police trying to speak as he is not getting a word in edgewise as he is being cut-off by Charlie.
CHARLIE to MR. HOLLISTON: (As Charlie has a look of dismay on his face and is using a worried and questionable voice): "But, why?"
MR. HOLLISTON to CHARLIE: (With a carrying look and is using a carrying and explanative and carrying voice): "Well, through you, we can get their Mr. Big!"
ANNIE to MR. HOLLISTON: (With a worried look and is using a concerned and questionable voice): "Well, who is Mr. Big?"
MR. HOLLISTON to ANNIE: (As he is using his explanational voice and has a carrying look states): "He's head of their Big Spy Ring, he'll stop at nothing to get what he wants, even if has to torture, or murder you!"
ANNIE to MR. HOLLISTON: (As she has a sad look on her face and sad voice): "Ooooooh!"
CHARLIE to MR. HOLLISTON: (As Charlie is now totally petrified beyond his wits end and is saying in a stammering and worried voice): "Huff, huff, huff, huff, huff, huff, torture, or mur, mur, mur, mur, murder me?"
MR. HOLLISTON to CHARLIE: (With a carrying look on his face and a carrying voice says): "Yes, don't worry, we'll get him!"
CHARLIE to MR. HOLLISTON: (As Charlie is now freaked out beyond the 'ENTH DEGREE' and is saying in a scared voice): "G-O-O-D!"
MR. HOLLISTON to CHARLIE: (As he is looking at Charlie is dismay and is using a sarcastic voice): "Aaaaah, Charlie, in case we goof up somewhere along the line, take this pill and put it under your tongue. But, don't worry, Charlie, we'll get him!"
CHARLIE to MR. HOLLISTON: (As Charlie is now freaked out totally and is saying in a worried voice): "G-O-O-D!"
MR. HOLLISTON to CHARLIE: (Has a worried look on his face and is using a questionable voice asks Charlie): "Then, you'll help us?"
MR. HOLLISTON to CHARLIE: (As Charlie is now mad and scared and is giving Mr. Holliston back his pill and is exiting in a state of fear as Mr. Holliston is saying to him): "Now, waith a minute Charlie, if you should leave now, and the Secret Agents should pick you up it could be mighty un-pleasant. We'll have someone protecting you at all times!"
UPDYKE CHIEF OF POLICE to CHARLIE: (As he is standing there in a prideful state says): "Aaaaah, you're in good hands. My men and I will be looking after you!"
CHARLIE to the UPDYKE POLICE CHIEF: (As Charlie is looking at him with a scared look and his eyes popping out of his head and says in a scared voice): "G-O-O-D!"
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is looking at Charlie mischievously and taps Charlie on his shoulder whispers to Charlie in a mischievous voice): "Ask him!"
CHARLIE to the UPDYKEY CHIEF OF POLICE: (As Charlie has a mischievous look on his face and is using a stammering, mischievous voice): "Oh, aaaah, aaaah, aaaah, aaaah, Chief, can, can, can, we ask you a personal question?"
UPDYKE CHIEF OF POLICE to CHARLIE: (As he has a sheepish look on his face and is saying in a mischeivous voice): "Humh-haaa; humh-haaa."
CHARLIE to the UPDYKE CHIEF OF POLICE: (As he and Annie are standing there with sheepish smirks on their faces as Charlie is asking in a mischievous voice): "Well, Annie and me think we know you from someplace. Haven't we seen you before?"
UPDYKE CHIEF OF POLICE to ANNIE and CHARLIE: (As he is now removing his cap and has a slightly embarrassed look on his face and is using an embarrassed voice); "Uhnh, did you see this picture from the beginning?"
We now see Charlie and Annie standing there with their eyes bugging out of their heads, their mouths agait, and nodding their heads in agreement and have looks of bewilderment on their faces as they are now recognizing the Chief Of Police as their Ex-boss from the 'Daredevil Grillé.
We now see Mr. Big siting at his desk smoking on a humongous-sized cigar as he is watching a 'TOM AND JERRY' cartoon on the television while he is on the telephone.
COMRADE SEED to MR. BIG: (As he is sitting across the table from him is saying to Mr. Big with an apologetic and worried voice): "But, Mr. Big!"
MR. BIG to COMRADE SEED: (As he is shouting at him in a thoroughly disgusted voice): "Listen, you blundering Blubberhead, on account of your bumbling, I've gotta do it myself. Now, I'm gonna recover that stuff. Just make sure you get him out of that store tonight!"
COMRADE SEED to MR. (As Comrade Seed is saying to him via the telephone in a really scared tone of voice): "But, Mr. Big!"
MR. BIG to COMRADE SEED: (As Mr. Big is sitting there with his eyes closed in a state of disgust and using a disgusted voice): "Out, out, and do your assignment."
We now see Comrade Seed give Mr. Big his ugly chipmunk look in disgust as Mr. Big is look at him in a wicked looks as Comrade Seed is now exiting the Spy Headquarters. Mr. Big is now back enjoying his giant cigar and his 'TOM AND JERRY' cartoon.
We now see Comrade Seed standing in front of the book store as he has a wicked look on his face and has taken a final drag off of his cigarette. Comrade Seed in now approaching Comrade Olga.
COMRADE SEED to COMRADE OLGA: (As he is looking at her with an evil look and is asking her in a wicked voice): "Anything change?"
COMRADE OLGA to COMRADE SEED: (As she is standing there with a really devilsh look on her face and says in an evil voice): "Neyt!"
COMRADE SEED to COMRADE OLGA: (As he is looking at her in a really evil way and is shouting at her in a demented voice): "Just go in there and make sure that our cosmonaut is going to that party tonight!"
Comrade Seed has now given Comrade Olga his chipmunk glare as Comrade Olga is now in an evil state as she is now swaggering into the book store swinging her hips in a sultery manne as she is now slithering up to Charlie in a very seductive manner.
COMRADE OLGA to CHARLIE: (As she is standing there in a very suductive manner as she is saying to Charlie in a sultery voice): "Hello, doll face."
CHARLIE to COMRADE OLGA: (As he is looking at her with a loving and googling look on his face as he is saying to her in a sweet and loving voice): "Oooooh, hello, pussy-cat!"
COMRADE OLGA to CHARLIE: (As she has a really evil looking smile on her face as she is standing there really suductively as she is saying in a sultrey voice): "I was just chequing, I want to make sure you're coming to the party tonight!"
CHARLIE to COMRADE OLGA: (As he is looking at her with a sheepish look as he is saying to her in a really flirtatious voice): "Oh, sure, I'll be there with bells on. If it's cold, I'll wear somethin' warmer."
COMRADE OLGA to CHARLIE: (As she is standing there with an evil and sultery look on her face as she is saying to Charlie in a wicked voice): "You be sure you save me a couple of dances? You know things have bee awfully dull lately. And you can make life much more interesting. I'll see you tonight, ta-ta."
CHARLIE to COMRADE OLGA: (As he is standing there getting totally mesmerized out by her evil and seductive ways says to her): "And, don't forget, poo-poo-pe-do!"
Comrade Olga has now tapped the totally mesmerized in love Charlie on his cheek in a sultery, seductive, and evil state. She is now exiting the book store in a sultery manner as Charlie is watching her with goo-goo eyes.
We now see Annie approaching Charlie as she is trying to also be sultery and seductive as she has a devilsh smirk on her face as Charlie is looking at her with a bewildered smirk on his face.
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is standing there acting cool and seductive as she has a loving smirk on her face as she is saying to Charlie in a low and sultery voice as she is standing there with her hands over her head and her hip swung sideways): "Hello, doll face."
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he is standing there with a dumbfounded look on his face says to her in a mad voice): "Hello, Orangatan."
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is standing there with her arms crossed, a mischievous look on her face says to him in a mischievous voice): "Hey, you did a bit of all right, weren't you rock. Who's the ooooh chick in the black underwear?"
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As Charlie is standing there with a gleeful look on his face as he is saying in a happy voice): "That's Olga, she just came in to cheque to see if I am coming to the Big Beatnik Party tonight. Hey, how do I make myself look like a Beatnik?"
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she has a mischievous look and says in a mischievous voice): "Well, you put on a dirty shirt, and muss up you hair, and if you don't shave or take a bath for a week, you can go just as you are."
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As Charlie has a look of dismay on his face and is using a low and sarcastic voice): "Glad, I asked ya!"
We are now back on the picture of Napoleon where we see one of the spies peeking through the eyes to get more os a low down on Charlie, {Yasha} and the lay-out of the book store. We now see Magda at the main sales counter as she is looking at some sales receipts as Mr. Holliston is now approaching her.
MR. HOLLISTON to MAGDA: (As he is looking at her with a sweet look on his face and is asking her in a carrying voice): "Are you about ready to go home?"
MAGDA to MR. HOLLISTON: (As she is looking at him with a sweet look and is using a lovey tone of voice): "Yes Jim, I'm all caught up for now!"
MR. HOLLISTON to MAGDA: (As he has a worried look on his face and says in a carrying voice): "May I walk you home? I have to come back and keep an eye on the store until a man releaves me at ten o'clock. We could have dinner then, if you can wait that long?"
MAGDA to MR. HOLLISTON: (As she is standing there with a sweet and loving smile and is saying in a lovey, dovey voice): "I think I could. That would be very nice."
MR. HOLLISTON to MAGDA: (As he is looking at her with a look of dismay and his is using a worried voice): "You know, so much has been going on around here, I haven't had a moment to tell you how I really feel about you!"
MAGDA to MR. HOLLISTON: (As she has a deep look of love on her face and is using a loving voice): "Maybe you could start telling me on the way home."
We now see Mr. Holliston exiting out of the store with his arm around Magda's shoulder in a state of love as the spy is still looking through Napoleon's eyes getting some more clues about what is going to happen in the store tonight.
We are now at the Beatnik Party where we see a bunch of college students dressed in 1960's Hippie attire, with long bead, worn our shirts, very short mini-skirts, hippie head bands as they are gyrating around doing a dance called "THE MONKEY" to the beat of the "BEETLES."
We now see Comrade Seed and Comrade Olga entering the Beatnik Party as he is dressed in a regular business suit and she has on a micro-mini black lace dress and black lace fish net stockings as she has a gold metalic wig on her head. We now see Charlie, {Yasha} entering the Party through the back entrance way looking over the party with a look of glee on his face.
COMRADE OLGA to COMRADE SEED: (As she is standing there with a wicked look on her face as she is saying in a low and evil voice): "Look, there he is."
COMRADE SEED to COMRADE OLGA: (As she has a vicious look on her face and a viscious voice): "Yeah, now get with him and don't let him out of your sight."
I'm gonna contact Mr. Big. I'll meet you in a few minutes. We now see Comrade Seed exiting out of the Party to get in touch with Mr. Big. While the seductive and sultery Comrade Olga is slithering her way over to Charlie, {Yasha}.
COMRADE OLGA to CHARLIE, {YASHA}: (As she has a sultery and evil look on her face and is using a sedutive voice): "Oh, there you are."
CHARLIE to COMRADE OLGA: (As she has now rubbed his hand over his head and has a sweet and mischievous voice and a look of love): "Yeah, here I are."
COMRADE OLGA to CHARLIE: (As she has an evil and worried look and is using a worried voice): "I was beginning to be afraid you weren't gonna show up."
CHARLIE to COMRADE OLGA: (As he has a bewildered look and is using a carrying voice): "With you here?"
COMRADE OLGA to CHARLIE: (As she is still using her low and sultery ways says to Charlie): "You like dancing?"
CHARLIE to COMRADE OLGA: (As Charlie is looking at her with goo-goo eyes and saying in a lovey dovey voice): "Do I like dancing. I come from a family of dancers. My great-granddad died dancing."
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she was standing in the background observing Charlie and Olga with her arms crossed and in a thorough state of disgust says in a sarcastic voice): "Sure, the end of a rope!"
COMRADE OLGA to CHARLIE: (As she is acting sickey, sirupie, phoney to Charlie as she is asking him in a low and wicked voice): "Would you like some punch, lover?"
CHARLIE to COMRADE OLGA: (As Charlie is looking at her with a sweet and loving look as he is saying to her in a loving voice): "I sure would, kitten!"
COMRADE OLGA to CHARLIE: (As she is being phoney lovey dovey to Charle, {Yasha} as she is saying to him in a sultery voice): "Come on, I'll show you where it is."
We now see Annie standing there with her arms crossed as she has her head cocked and a demented look on her face as she is watching Charlie and Olga walking away together giving each other phoney goo-goo eyes as he is smiling sweetly at her.
ANNIE to GOOD LOOKING YOUNG {MALE} COLLEGE STUDENT: (As she is looking at him with a really sweet look and says to him in a slightly flirtatious voice): Well, henh, henh, henh, henh!"
GOOD LOOKING YOUNG {MALE} COLLEGE STUDENT to ANNIE: (As he is smiling sweetly at her and is saying in a carrying tone of voice): "Hey, you look like a swinger."
ANNIE to the GOOD LOOKING YOUNG {MALE} COLLEGE STUDENT: (As she has a happy smile on her face and is saying gleefully): "Yeah, henha, henha, henha, henha, henha, henha!"
GOOD LOOKING YOUNG {MALE} COLLEGE STUDENT to ANNIE: (As he is looking at her in a really lovey way as he is saying to her in a flirtatious voice): "Hey, aaaaah, I dig you, man!"
ANNIE to the GOOD LOOKING YOUNG {MALE} COLLEGE STUDENT: (As she has a mad look on her face and says in a mean tone of voice not knowing the 'Hippie Slang' terms shouts to him): "M-A-N?"
We now see the evil, seductive Comrade Olga using all of evil spells to toatally mesmerize Charlie, {Yasha}, as she thinks, into loving her and giving her the secret documents that she thinks he has as she is ladeling the love sick Charlie, {Yasha} a cup of punch. Comrade Olga has now blown Charlie a kiss, as they have now clinked their cups together in a toast of so called friendship as they are now taking a drink. Charlie has now had his punch cup knocked out of his hand while Comrade Olga had hers spilled down the front of her dress by some gyrating college students.
Charlie is now fishing in the punch bowl as he now sees a mezzarinie cherry as he now has a horrible look of pain on his face as he has now caought himself a rodent trap instead of a mezzarinie cherry. Comrade Olga is now looking at Charlie, {Yasha} with a hurtful look on her face.
CHARLIE to COMRADE OLGA: (As she is standing there with a really horrible look of pain on his face as he is removing the rodent trap from his fingers says in a painful voice): "Boy, they don't trust anybody around here."
We now see Annie happily dancing with the the Good Looking Young {Male} College Student as they are now doing "THE TWIST." We now see the Updyke Chief of Police entering the Party, wearing a pair of skin tight polyester trousers, a tight turtle neck sweater, a Mexican Style Jacket, a long black wig, and a Sombreo Hat.
UPDYKE CHIEF OF POLICE to HIS PARTNER: (As he is looking at his partner with a serious look on his face and is saying tohim in a serious voice): "Now, you stay here. Without my hat nobody will recognize me. I'm going to mingle."
We now see Comrade Seed standing outside of the Party as he has one hand in his coat pocket and the other resting on decorative brick wall as he has an evil and wicked look on his face as he is waiting for his partner in crme, Comrade Olga.
COMRADE SEED to MR. BIG: (As he has an evil look and is using a wicked voice as they are using walkie-talkies): "We have him!"
MR. BIG, {OOPS, JAMES BOND} to COMRADE SEED: (As he is responding back in an evil voice): "Good show!"
COMRADE SEED to MR. BIG?: (As he is standing there with an evil look and using a demented voice): "As you requested, I am calling for further instructions."
MR. BIG?, {JAMES BOND} to COMRADE SEED: (As they are still communicating on their walkie-talkies is asking him): "What's that?"
COMRADE SEED to MR. BIG, {JAMES BOND}: (As he is standing there with an evil look of pride on his face as he is saying in a devilsh voice): "Comrade Olga is with him now."
MR. BIG, {JAMES BOND} to COMRADE SEED: (As he has a questionable voice): "Comrade Olga?"
COMRADE SEED to MR. BIG, {JAMES BOND}: (As he has a proud look on his face and using a prideful voice): "Yes!"
MR. BIG, {JAMES BOND} to COMRADE SEED: (As he is not totally dumbfounded asks him): "Yeah, who is this?"
COMRADE SEED to the PERSON ON WALKIE-TALKIE: (Is asking him in a very questionable voice): "Who is this?"
PERSON ON WALKIE-TALKIE to COMRADE SEED: (As he is responding in a mad voice): "BOND, JAMES BOND!"
COMRADE SEED to JAMES BOND: (As he has an apologetic look on his face and an apologetic voice): "Oh, I'm sorry Mr. Bond, I must of tuned in on the wrong channel."
All the while that Comrade Seed thought he was talking with Mr. Big, but in reality it was JAMES BOND.
We are now in spy headquarters where we see the Fat Assasin Lady standing there behind Mr. Big with an evil smirk on her face as Mr. Big is now telling Comrade Seed off.
MR. BIG to COMRADE SEED: (As he has an evil look on his face and is shouting at Comrade Seed in a wicked voice): "You idiot, you bumbling idiot, tune me in, to the salt mines."
We now see Comrade Seed standing there with a really hurtful look on his face as his walkie-talkie is now temporarily on the fritz.
COMRADE SEED to MR. BIG: (As he is standing there with a hurtful look on his face is saying to him in an apologetic voice): "Mr. Big, oh, Mr, . Big!"
MR. BIG to COMRADE SEED: (As Mr. Big is shouting at him in a really wicked voice): "Go ahead, you imbecile!"
COMRADE SEED to MR. BIG: (With a hurtful look on his face and is using an apologetic voice): "I'm calling for further instructions."
MR. BIG to COMRADE SEED: (As he now has a happy look on his face and using a calmer voice): "You were right, we have found nothing in the book store. Someone tried to stop us, but he's no longer a problem. Now listen carefully, tomorrow the Science and Space Convention starts, we can wait no longer, bring Yasha here!"
COMRADE SEED to MR. BIG: (As Comrade Seed has a really worried look on his face and using a serious voice): "Yes, Comrade."
MR. BIG to COMRADE SEED: (As he has a somewhat happy look and using a calm voice): "I'm sending a few men to help you. They should be there, right about now."
We now hear an automobile coming to a screeching hault as Comrade Seed is standing there with a really scared look on his face as these are the men that Mr. Big has sent to help out Comrade Seed.
COMRADE SEED to MR. BIG: (With a look of mischief on his face and a mischievous voice): "They have arrived, over and out!"
We are now back inside of the Beatnik Party where we see Charlie dancing happily with wicked Comrade Olga. We are now outside of the Beatnik Party where we see Comrade Seed standing in the side lines giving his helpers the come here sign as the helpers are now also standing in the side lines with evil looks on their faces.
Comrade Seed has now gotten Comrade Olga's eye as he is waving his hand wickedly for her to come outside as he has now given her the chipmunk look. He has now waved his finger over his throat as the cut off signal as she is giving him back an evil look saying she doesn't know what to do.
COMRADE OLGA to CHARLIE, {YASHA}: (As she has now thought of a way to get outside as she is looking at him with a sultery look and is asking him in an evil voice): "I'm awfully warm, could we go outside for a walk?"
CHARLIE, {YASHA} to COMRADE OLGA: (As he is giving her a sweet smile and using a mischievous voice): "You kiddin', I'm just gettin' started, come on!"
COMRADE OLGA to CHARLIE, {YASHA}: (As she has a phoney, hurtful look on her face as she is using a phoney, crying voice): "Please? Just a teentsie little......"
CHARLIE to COMRADE OLGA: (With a happy look on his face as he is really enjoying the party): "Little later, come on now, heee, heee, heee, heee, heee, heee!"
COMRADE OLGA to CHARLIE, {YASHA}: (As she is looking at him with a begging look and using a pleading voice): "Just a teentsie one?"
CHARLIE to COMRADE OLGA: (With a mad look and a mad voice as he is dancing with her starting on out): "Well, all right!"
UPDYKE CHIEF OF POLICE to CHARLIE: (As he has now approached Charlie in madness and shouting madly): "Hold it buster, where do you think you're going?"
COMRADE OLGA to the UPDYKE POLICE OFFICER: (As she has a bewildered look on her face and using a worried voice): "Oh, we were just going outside for a breath of fresh air."
COMRADE OLGA to CHARLIE, {YASHA}: (As she is looking at him wickedly and using a wicked voice): "Come on, lover."
UPDYKE CHIEF OF POLICE to COMRADE OLGA: (As he has an evil look and a mean voice): "Lover, can't go anywhere I can't keep an eye on him. I'll go out and look first!"
We now see the Updyke Chief Of Police, all in the line of duty, going outside to see if it is safe for Charlie to be able to step out with the wicked, evil, and seductive Comrade Olga. He is now being brutally hit in the head by Comrade Seed. We now see the evil and wicked Comrade Seed waving his finger at Comrade Olga in the come here movement.
COMRADE OLGA to CHARLIE, {YASHA}: (As she is looking at him wickedly and using an evil voice): "it's okay, come on sweetie, let's go outside."
Just as the evil Comrade Olga was trying to lure Charlie outside to be captured by Comrade Seed and his thugs he is now being approached by Mr. Holliston.
MR. HOLLISTON to CHARLIE: (As he is looking at Charlie with a worried look and using a carrying voice): "Charlie, have either of you see Magda?"
COMRADE OLGA to MR. HOLLISTON: (As she is glarring evily at him and is shouting at him in a wicked voice): "N-O!"
CHARLIE to MR. HOLLISTON: (As Charlie has a worried look on his face and is asking in a worried voice): "Why, is something wrong?"
MR. HOLLISTON to CHARLIE: (With a worried look and a concerned voice): "Why, she was suppose to meet me for dinner, but she's not in her apartment."
CHARLIE to MR. HOLLISTON: (With a worried look says to him in a scared voice): "Humh, I got no idea where she could be."
MR. HOLLISTON to CHARLIE: (As he has a mad look and a mad voice): "Where's the Chief, he's not suppose to leave you alone for a minute!"
CHARLIE to MR. HOLLISTON: (As Charlie is saying to him in a worried voice and concerned look): "Well, he stepped outside a few seconds ago and that was the last I saw of him!"
MR. HOLLISTON to CHARLIE: (As he is now getting vibes on Charlie's current surrounding is saying to him in a worried voice): "Charlie, I don't like the looks of this. Get back to the book store, quick, a becareful."
CHARLIE to MR. HOLLISTON: (With a worried look and saying to him in an obedient voice): "All right!"
We now see Charlie going back to the book store as Mr. Holliston has now smelt a rat and has gone outside and grabbed a hold of Comrade Seed and one of the thugs and klonked their coconuts together.
We now see Annie sitting on a bench with the Good Looking Young {Male} College Student as she has a really down in the dumps look on her face as he is sitting there with his arms across her shoulders and is looking at her with a loving look.
GOOD LOOKING YOUNG {MALE} COLLEGE STUDENT to ANNIE: (As he is gazzing into her eyes with love and is saying to her in a loving voice): "You know, I could really go for a mature, beautiful woman like you."
ANNIE to the GOOD LOOKING YOUNG {MALE} COLLEGE STUDENT: (With a mean look and sarcastic voice): "Is that a compliment?"
GOOD LOOKING YOUNG {MALE} COLLEGE STUDENT to ANNIE: (As he is fully in love with her and she has a worried look says): "Sure, those Co-eds are nothing but a bunch of silly kids. Come closer baby!"
ANNIE: (As she is resisting a tad at first and then says with a dazed look): "Why, am I fighting this?"
We now see Annie in a full blown lip lock with him. We now see Charlie prowling around in un-forbidden turf at the dance taking a chance of being captured by the 'Klabiasha Espionage Bureau' instead of being home {supposedly} safe in the book store as he is looking for Annie.
Annie is now at 'Base Ten' with the Good Looking Student as Charlie has now appeared on the scene.
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he has a worried look and a worried voice shouting): "Annie, Annie, Annie, I'm glad I found you!"
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is looking at him dementedly and says to him in a mean voice as she is still at 'Base Ten'): "Now that you found me, lose me!"
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he is looking with a carrying look and is bugging her in a state of worry and her protection): "No, no, Annie, come on, we gotta go. I'll explain it on the way over."
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (She gave him a mad looking and waving her hand at him for him to boogeying as she in still enjoying 'Base Ten'): "Unhm, unhm, unhm, unhm, unhm, unhm, unhm, unhm!"
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he is still persistantly bugging her to help protect her is shouting and shaking her in pure un-adulterated panic): "Come on, stop foolin' around."
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is really enjoying her 'Necking Party' says to Charlie in a evil voice): "Who's foolin' around?"
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As Charlie has a look of petrified panic and is using a panicking and stammering voice): "I gotta get outta here, they're, rhey're, they're, after me, I gotta go."
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (Looking wickedly at Charlie and says to him wickedly about the 'Necking Party'): "Well, somebody's after me and I gotta stay!"
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he is still pestering her out of fear and panic is shaking her in fear and using a carrying voice): "No, no, no, look, look, look, I'll, I'll, show, show, ya, ya, wait a, wait a, wait a minute. I don't wanna break up this thing, but we gotta get out of here."
We now see Charlie diving into the middle of the 'Necking Party' as he is separating the two of them and is grabbing Annie by her arm in horrified panic.
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is now thoroughly disgusted with Charlie as she is shouting to him): "Oh, Charlie!"
ANNIE to the GOOD LOOKING YOUNG {MALE} COLLEGE STUDENT: (As she is looking at him apologetically and saying in a carrying voice): "Don't make a move honey, I wanna remember you just like this."
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he now has her hand and is running with her in tota panic says): "Come on!"
We now see the Good Looking Studnet watching Charlie and Annie like he thinks that they are a pair of raving lunatics.
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As he is trying to sneak them to the book store without being caught as she is shouting at Charlie in a high whisper): "All right, all right, all right, what are we doing here?"
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he is looking at her evily and using a worried voice): "It's those dirty Klabiashes, they're trying to kill me, they think I got the records and tapes like Jim said."
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (Looking at him evily and using a demented voice): "Well then, you've got nothing to worry about, whey they kill ya, then tehy'll find out they're wrong, you're not their missing cosmonaut."
We now see Charlie smiling with glee at what Annie has now said without realizing what she had actually said.
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he has slapped his hand together in glee as he is now saying in a gleeful voice): "Hey, haaa, haaa, haaa, haaa, haaa, haaa, boy what a joke on them, haaa, haaa, haaa, haaa!"
We now see Charlie crying as he has now come to reality and has sunken into his coconut what Annie has now actually stated.
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is now looking at Charlie with a carrying look as she is using a re-assuring voice): "Aaaaah, come on now, cut that out what'll we do now?"
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (With a sad look on his face and using a crying and stammering voice): "Well, may be, be, we, we, bet, bet, bet, better go back to the book store, Jim said maybe somebody there can help us."
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (With a happy look and a happy voice): "All right, good, then let's go!"
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As he is still crying in fear and using a hurtful voice): "I can't!"
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (Looking at him a dazed look and using a questionable voice): "Why, not?"
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (With a look of mischief and a mischievous voice): "You're standing on my foot!"
We now se Annie looking at Charlie with a full blown look of disgust and madness on her face.
We are now back in the book store as we see Annie and Charlie walking in, in a state of fear as they are now coming upon their 'Second Dead Piece Of Meat, founded in the book store, compliments of the "Klabiasha Espionage Bureau'. We now see Comrade Seed standing by the door disguised as a dummie as he is now pointing a .44 magnum gat at both Charlie and Anne who are petrified beyond no end.
COMRADE SEED to CHARLIE and ANNIE: (As he is standing there with a really evil look on his face as he is pointing the .44 gat at them and asks wickedly): "Is that who you were looking for?"
We now see Annie and Charlie turning around as they are now looking at Comrade Seed in really petrified looks of fear as their eyes are bugging out of their heads painfully.
ANNIE to COMRADE SEED: (As she has a really petrified look on her face as she is asking him in a scared and stammering voice): "Wha, wha, wha, wha, what happened to him?"
COMRADE SEED to ANNIE and CHARLIE: (As he is now looking at them with that ugly chipmunk look as he is using an evil voice): "Oh, he just wouldn't do something I asked him too."
We now see Annie and Charlie looking at one another in horrible looks of panic as their eyes are popping out of their heads in fear.
ANNIE and CHARLIE to COMRADE SEED: (As they have really scared looks on their faces and are asking him in unison in full blown panic): "Is there something you'd like us to do for you?"
COMRADE SEED to ANNIE and CHARLIE: (As he is responding them in a mad look and questionable voice): "Yeah, there's a friend of mine that would like to meet you, go ahead!"
We now see Annie walking by the dead man, identity unknown, as she has a scared look on her face as Charlie is holding onto her arm as he is looking behind himself at Comrade Seed totally petrified out of his skin as they are walking in the direction that Comrade Seed wants them to got as Comrade Seed is now evily following behind them still pointing his gat at them.
We are now entering into a side room of the store where we see Magda hog tied on a chair as the Fat Assasin Lady is standing there with her back to us as Mr. Big was being hidden by the Fat Assasin Lady.
CHARLIE to MAGDA: (As he is now noticing her totally freaked out of his gourd as he says to her in a surprised and worried voice): Magda!?"
COMRADE SEED to MR. BIG: (As he has his evil chipmunk look on his face as he is saying in a wicked voice): "Well, here they are Mr. Big!"
We now see the Fat Assasin Lady stepping aside as we are now seeing Mr. Big, {who in reality is a midget}.
MR. BIG to COMRADE SEED: (As he is now marching up to Annie and Charlie at a gleeful trot holding a stogie and with a wicked look): "Good!"
CHARLIE to MR. BIG: (As Charlie is pointing a finger at him and is laughing hysterically says): "Mr. Big, haaa, haaa, haaa, haaa, haaa, haaa, haaa!"
MR. BIG to CHARLIE: (As he still thinks Charlie is Yasha and shouts to him wickedly as he has now given Charlie, {Yasha} a good swift kick in his shins): 'T-R-A-D-E-R!"
CHARLIE to MR. BIG: (As Charlie has a look of pain and using a painful voice): "Ooowh, ooowh, ooowh, ooowh, ooowh, ooowh, ooowh, ooowh, wha, wha, wha, wha, what are you do, do, do, do, doing with, with, with, with, with Magda?"
MR. BIG to CHARLIE: (As he still thinks Charlie is {Yasha Nudnick} is saying to Charlie with an evil look and shouting at him wickedly): "She was just our little insurance policy, in case we couldn't get you the easy way!"
CHARLIE to MR. BIG: (As Charlie is pointing a finger at him and has a mischievous look on his face is saying in a really scared voice): "Look who's sellin' a 'Little' insurance policy!"
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is looking at Charlie mischievously and saying to Charlie in a mischievous voice): "I wonder if there's a clause for shrinkage?"
COMRADE SEED to CHARLIE and ANNIE: (As he is using his ugly chipmunk look and is pointing his gat at them and is saying to them in a really wicked voice): "Shut-up, well, Mr. Big?"
CHARLIE to MR. BIG: (As he is once again pointing a finger at him and is laughing hysterically as he is saying questionably): "Mr. Big?"
It is now round two where we see Mr. Big walking up to Charlie, {Yasha} and giving him another swift, hard kick in the shins as Charlie is yelling painfully, 'oooowh, oooowh, oooowh, oooowh, oooowh, oooowh, oooowh, oooowh!
MR. BIG to CHARLIE, {YASHA NUDNICK}: (As he has now finished kicking him in the shins for the second time and is yelling in an evil voice): "Shut-up, Nudnick!"
We now see Charlie, {Yasha Nudnic} and Annie standing there with evil glares on their faces.
MR. BIG to CHARLIE, {YASHA NUDNICK}: (As he is holding a stogie, evil look and a wicked voice): "We, searched every inch of this room and we can't find a trace of your records or your tapes!"
CHARLIE to MR. BIG: (As Charlie has a scared look and saying to him in a worried voice): "But, I'm not Yasha Nudnick, I'm Charlie Yuckapuck!"
COMRADE SEED to MR. BIG: (As Comrade Seed is standing by Mr. Big still holding his gat on Charlie and Annie and is using an evil voice): "It's too late, he's been brain washed."
ANNIE to MR. BIG and COMRADE SEED: (As she has a hurt look and begging on her face and saying in a pleading voice as she is rubbing Charlie's shoulders): "Oh, please don't hurt him, he doesn't know nothin', he's always been brain washed!"
MR. BIG to CHARLIE and ANNIE: (As he shouting at Annie and Charlie really dementedly): "Shut-up and take off your clothes!"
ANNIE to MR. BIG: (As she is standing there with her mouth agait, her eyes bugging out of her head and yelling loudly): "W-H-A-T?"
MR. BIG to ANNIE and CHARLIE: (As he is really freaking out in madness says to Annie, "No, not you!" to CHARLIE: "You must have the stuff on you now get out of those clothes!"
CHARLIE, {YASHA} to MR. BIG: (As Charlie is panicking out as he stammering from fear): "Wha, wha, wha, what, in, in, in, in front of these ladies?"
COMRADE SEED to CHARLIE, {YASHA}: (As he is using an evil voice and a wicked look): "Come on, before I slice them off you and when I slice, I ain't neat!"
We now see Charlie being quick on his feet as he has now remembered the button to the secret shoot to the basement quarters as he is now frantically giving it a push. Charlie has now sent Mr. Big flying to the basment quarters, as we once again hear bells and whistles going off. Annie has now picked up a vase of flowers and is hitting Comrade Seed in the coconut with them, sending Comrade Seed to the ground flat on his face.
CHARLIE to the FAT ASSASIN LADY: (As Charlie now has Comrade Seeds .44 mag. gat and is waving it at her in madness and is yelling in madness): "All right, Fat Lady, get up here."
CHARLIE to ANNIE: (As Charlie is holding the gat with a mischievous look and is saying to Annie in a mischievous voice): "Boy, I ain't been watchin' "SHOOTIN' SAM" for nothing!"
We now see Annie looking at Charlie with a really proud look as she is patting Charlie's shoulders in pride.
UPDYKE CHIEF OF POLICE to the TELEPHONE: (As he has a serious look on his face and is using a serious voice): "Unha-haaa; unha-haaa, yeah, that's right!"
MR. HOLLISTON to MAGDA, CHARLIE, and ANNIE: (As he is standing there with a serious voice and carrying look): "That's the reason we couldn't come in any sooner, with a knife and gun on Charlie and Annie there was nothing we could do, but wait for a break!"
UPDYKE CHIEF OF POLICE to MR. HOLLISTON: (As he is now hanging up the telephone and is saying to Mr. Holliston in a carrying state): "Yeah, the wagon will be here any minute!"
CHARLIE to MR. HOLLISTON: (As Charlie has a happy look and saying gleefully): "Good!"
MR. HOLLISTON to CHARLIE: (As he is waving his hand to quiet Charlie and is saying carryingly): "S-S-S-S-S-S-H-H-H-H-H-H!"
MR. HOLLISTON to the UPDYKE CHIEF OF POLICE: (As Mr. Holliston is now removing his gat from the side of his trousers is saying in a serious voice): "Chief, I think we've got a couple more customers for ya!"
We now see our two burglar friends walking up a side aisle way with evil but yet happy looks on their faces as they are once again toting their 'Sand Pails', not knowing what is in store for them in approximately twenty-feet.
BURGLAR ONE to BURGLAR TWO: (As he has a look of glee on his face as he is saying to his partner in crime in a state of pride): "Well, that's it, tomorrow night's the night, Mike!"
BURGLAR TWO to BURGLAR ONE: (As he is saying to his partner in crime in pride): "Yeah, we're almost through!"
MR. HOLLISTON to the TWO BURGLARS: (As the burglars are standing there with looks of panic as Mr. Holliston is pointing his gat at them and is saying in a mean voice): "You're through now, fellas!"
We now see our two burglar friends dropping their 'Sand Pails' in total fear.
MAGDA to MR. HOLLISTON: (As she is looking at Jim and the two burglars with a bewildered look and questionable voice): "Jim, who are these men?"
MR. HOLLISTON to MAGDA: (With his gat pointing at the burglars, a mad look and a mad voice): "They have been digging a tunnel from your cellar to the bank next door. We've known about it all along, but didn't want anymore Police activity until we settled this Cosmonaut matter."
All the while that Mr. Holliston was having his little tit-for-tat with our burglar friends we saw Charlie, Annie, and Magda watching the whole matter with look of fear.
UPDYKE CHIEF OF POLICE to the TWO BURGLARS: (With a look of madness and a mean voice): "Come on gentlemen, we have room for you at the Station House."
FEATURE ENDING {PART ONE}:
This feature is now drawing to a close as we see the members of the Klabiasha Espionage Bureau in handcuffs along with the two burglars as they are now going to the hoosegow and booked for ther proper charges.
UPDYKE CHIEF OF POLICE to HIS GANG OF CRIMINALS: (As he has a mean look on his face and using a mean voice as he hearding them to the Patrol Automobile like hearding cattle): "Come on, moce along!"
We now see Charlie out of total curiosity approaching the luggage cases to see what is inside of them. Charlie has now noticed a giant sack and is looking inside in curiosity as he is spilling it out and discovering fifty pounds of sand and debris.
CHARLIE to ANNIE, MAGDA, and MR. HOLLISTON: (As Charlie has a look of mischief on his face and a mischievous voice): "Boy, I've seen dirty laundry."
ANNIE to MR. HOLLISTON: (With a happy look on her face and using a happy voice): "Say, Jim, they tell me that when you Government Me finish up a capper, you always, kinda, tie up the lose ends. What happened to the real Cosmonaut, the real Yasha Nudnick?"
MR. HOLLISTON to ANNIE: (As he is leaning on the side of the sales counter with his hands folded in a serious state): "I should be getting a call any moment."
We now hear the ringing of the telephone as we see Magda, Annie, and Mr. Holliston all standing there with puzzled looks on their face as we are now receiving a telephone about the real Yasha Nudnick.
ANNIE to MAGDA: (As she is standing there with a mischievous look and using a mischievous voice with her arms crossed): "Well, I guess, it's any moment."
MR. HOLLISTON to YASHA NUDNICK: (With a serious voice and a serious look): "Cheque!"
MR. HOLLISTON to MAGDA and ANNIE: (As he has now hung up the telephone and is saying in a serious state): "At 11:02, Yasha Nudnick, the Klabiashaian Cosmonaut, left his capsule and defected to our country. After 98 Orbital flights, he surrendered himself and the tapes and records of his Cosmic Flight in outer space to our Government!"
As Mr. Holliston was explaining the results of Yasha Nudnick to Annie and Magda we now see Charlie walking forward with a look of dismay on his face as he is taking a slip of paper from his pocket four inches all around as he is now reading off of it.
END OF FEATURE {PART TWO}:
"Folks, folks, many of your friends will be coming to see this thrilling and absorbing motion, PIC, {right here he is flipping the paper over to finish reading}. TURE, don't spoil it for them by devolging the exciting and shocking ending!"
ANNIE to CHARLIE: (As she is looking at him mischeivously and in a mischief voice): "You, gotta be kiddin'?"
ANNIE: (As she is sighing a sigh of relief says): "OH, THIS IS THE END!"
As it is fadding out we see Charlie and Annie standing there grinning mischievously.
Published by MGM Limited Edition Collection / 20th Century Fox Home Entertainment (2011)
Released on:
- DVD
No goofs or technical blunders have been logged for this episode.
Stooge Mayhem is not available for this episode.
No quotes have been logged for this episode.
No Stooge routines have been logged for this episode.
No trivia have been logged for this episode.
Posted 2009-04-23 21:49:26 by Carrie The Canary
Reviewer's Rating: (2)
Posted 2009-04-17 10:43:50 by Moron4392
Edited 2009-04-17 11:14:51 by Dunrobin
Reviewer's Rating: (6)
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